If you think your wife/girlfriend is bad.....

#1
Absolutely brilliant

http://www.mil-millington.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/things.html

Pissed myself at this one:

See if you can spot the difference between these two statements:
(a) "Those trousers make your backside look fat."
(b) "You're a repellently obese old hag upon whom I am compelled to heap insults and derision - depressingly far removed from the, 'stupid, squeaky, pocket-sized English women,' who make up my vast catalogue of former lovers and to whom I might as well return right now as I hate everything about you."
Maybe the acoustics were really bad in the dining room, or something.
 
#3
True, and excellent read and quite funny.

But. This bloke has written 28,617 words, on a single page, about argueing with his girlfriend. Thats a fcuking novel!!! They should probably just call it a day.

Boney

Edited to say, just seen that the page is by Mil Millington, who is a novelist. Figures.
 

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