Ideas for skits???

Discussion in 'Officers' started by Blair_witch, Oct 7, 2007.

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  1. Hoping to pool the collective experience here. Looking for ideas for skits to amuse the Bde Comd and assembled masses. I have been warned nothing sexual or diversity offensive. Which really rules out most things. Especially the one about the Ukranian gynacologist and the Welsh Rabbi.
    If anyone can help please pour it out. Many thanx
  2. :lol: OLD BENNY HILL VIDEOS :lol:
  3. I did a cracking Cilla Black and a Blind Date skit with the lads on a Company smoker - won a crate for me efforts too. Surprised our Duty Officer who thought he would get away with embarrasing himself when we grabbed him out of the audience to be the 'picker', screened him off before the lads (in drag) came out. Good time had . . .
  4. The attempted assasination of Hitler. I am sure your boss will take offense which will make all worthwhile. Place a briefcase bomb next to him and watch it explode and the expession on his face.
  5. Did a skit once where I played the OC discussing why people had missed Coy PT-brought out all their foibles and faults. Went down well. Also a poetic monologue about the characters and their cock ups can be good if you have a decent poet in your midst.
  6. Music? I've always thought that G&S 'Modern Major General' from Pirates of Penzance would work rather well.
  7. Saw a great "through the keyhole" at one of the gunner units I was serving at. The lads doing it even had a video of a room in the mess (doctored accordingly) which was passed off as some young subby's. Think hot and cold running toilet, map of africa etc, toys under the bed. It went down a storm but the target audience was a little less highbrow!
  8. One of the best i saw followed a Bde drumhead service where the padre had used Gideon vs Hittites (?) as theme for his sermon about (ahem, airborne) military fortitude & initiative...

    .... that evening one of the skits was "Gideon's O-Gp". Hilarious.

    Lots of potential ""O" Gps" from history....
  9. Some good stuff to work on folks, many thanks but keep em coming. Got a few things im planning but tell your friends, I could do with some help on this. Many thanx again
  10. My old TA Bn did a mock Court Martial - "March in the guilty b@stard!" sort of thing. Various key personnel were impersonated and had their foibles (good word, make a note of it Darling) and idiosyncrasies investigated.
  11. The Bootnecks on my Staff College did the Singing Arrses. White sheet with holes cut in it and bums poked through (owners of bums lie on tables behind the sheet) as "Bum-heads" - arrse-cracks for mouths, faces painted on, mouths operated by lying on one hand and opening the "mouth" manually.

    Dress each arrse up as an anonoying SO1 (complete with faces and characteristics drawn on in make-up/lumicolour), write script to offense-level allowed and finish with a rendition of "Fat Bottomed Girls" by Queen.

    Interesting takes can be supplied by having little cardboard bodies under each Arrse and other blokes with their arms sticking thru arm-holes to be the arms of the bums (as it were!). CAUTION: if the "arms" try to force-feed Maltesers/Twix/King-size Mars Bars to the "bum-heads", it can get ugly.

    It made me laugh, but then a drink was involved.

    That was the day I learned that just because I think something's funny, doesn't mean it is.

    Ill get my coat...

  12. Does the Welsh Rabbi worship in a Synagoch-goch-goch?
  13. Did a school assembly type skit once, act as the headmaster and dish the dirt on the assembled as a school bollocking. Pick the level you want to embarrass and go for it.
  14. I've seen a couple of variations on the Rowan Atkinson 'schoolmaster calling the class register' theme. The originals should be on YouTube.