I would value your opinion of my new army song?

#2
Oh dear...:skull: Incoming!
 

Joker62

ADC
Book Reviewer
#3
Haven't you posted this on enough forums already??
 
#5
Did you record it inside a 45 Gallon drum with a bag of marbles in your mouth?

Love the guitar playing, it sounds like you laid it on the floor and dragged a horses hooves over it.

Other than that sickly and too much footage of crying Americans, not enough women in swimsuits and no moving guitar solos.
 
#6
Did you record it inside a 45 Gallon drum with a bag of marbles in your mouth?

Love the guitar playing, it sounds like you laid it on the floor and dragged a horses hooves over it.

Other than that sickly and too much footage of crying Americans, not enough women in swimsuits that dont fit and no moving guitar solos.
Fixed that for you PG
 
#8
I've written a ballad in support of the war effort called "Allah Takes It Up The Arse, Doo-Dah, Doo-Dah". You can buy the rights if you want.
 
#9
My Daddy built me a cellar - I liked the original by Fred West but josef fritzl did a cover-up too. I mean cover version...
 

Biped

LE
Book Reviewer
#10
Hell, it made me cry that song did, and the ARRSE response; some wee came came out too. Now I've got to think of some specially sad things to stop the tears.
 
#11
Think of all the lawyers who haven't been shot yet - it's a travesty, I tell you...
 
#12
He learnt about the NAAFI bar in a similar fashion to me, I see.

Timshel's non-'orrible, considerate response (again): Deep, and a good message.

NAAFI Bar response: It's making a worse sound than that dog I strangled last night (But don't worry, I still got into the Army!) Oh, and now I think about it... There are too many crying yanks. Why do yanks cry so much?
 
#13
Their brains have been turned to sago by Jehovah's Witnesses.
 
#14
I haven't heard this little ditty yet. I can't wait, the reviews are incredible.
I suspect Louis Walsh is rubbing himself through his shiny trousers,weeping gently and gazing wistfully into the sky.
Have you thought about making a turbo garage version for the young 'uns? Seems to me you've got a huge career in front of you, post some more stuff. Fuck NME, this is were you'll get the truth.

As Rhianna once said 'Please Don't Stop the Music'! You, my son, are fucking special!
 
#15
Apologies if this offends but I thought it was seriously bad. The guitar was out of tune (there isn't a single guitar string in tune) and I thought the lyrics were mind numbingly depressing.

In fact I had to stop listening to it as I had the sudden urge to go out and hang myself from the garage beam. Not that I would in reality of course.

If this was the X-Factor or BGT then it would be resounding 'NO' better luck next time.
 
#16
Nice photos. The song will appeal to the ladies. Speaking as an old man I did not know if I would live long enough/stay awake long enough to hear all of the song.

One shouldn't cry, it obscures the sight picture.

Seriously though, good words, because most poetry is normally rubbish. It was just a bit quiet IMHO.
 
#17
Your composition is flat; a plodding, aimless affair. Now I quite like folk music which is often plodding and aimless but there is a sense of heritage or lineage in that style which this song doesn't have so it's just boring.
Your lyrics are not insightful, poetic or artful. I think it's trite and overly sentimental and could have been written by any teenager with a limited vocabulary and a bleeding heart.
I do like your voice however.
The images were painfully sappy bar one or two emotive ones.
All in all, I dont like it very much.
 
#18
Don't listen to 'em McCartney, they don't know good music. Get yourself on a talent show. Play your music, don't you ever change d'ya hear!

I can see it now (smokey, wobbly scene change)

'Tonight Matthew, I'm going to Bono'

Look at the respect that blokes got. 'H' and that other bloke from Steps are looking for a new band member (it was in the Big Issue) give them a call.

Live the dream!
 

Cutaway

LE
Kit Reviewer
#19
No, it's, "Tonight Matthew, I'm gong to be a tone deaf Capstan Full Strength smoker with Parkinson's, who's trying to break a rubber band round a shoebox."
 
#20
Some pretty harsh and scathing reviews so far. The guy has at least made an effort. An effort similar to a Downs Syndrome kid trying to force an earth worm down his uretha - painful and embarrasing to watch but ultimately funny and entertaining.

C- Must try harder
 

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