I was out in Oxford and this crusty student started on me...

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by cmt...hopefully, Mar 14, 2007.

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  1. There I was in some club in Oxford for a mate's birthday, standard procedure. I was chatting up some girl (a bit too short for my liking), telling her how I was joining the army, and how I had just done selection blahblahblah...she wasn't very interested.

    Anyway, this crusty student with dreadlocks overhears this, taps me on the shoulder and starts into some tirade about babykillers and Iraq and all that. Naturally, I just said I was out with my mates, just wanted to have a good time and not talk about any of that kind of thing. Next thing I know he's pushing me around, shouting abuse and my instincts kicked in and I, regrettably, ended up hitting him. 3 seconds pass before bouncers have thrown me and this kid out of the club.

    How do all you squaddies out there prevent fcuk ups like this?

    Whenever I go out with my future army buddies am I constantly going to be having my night ruined by ill-informed Gorgeous George Galloway fans?

    Is this just the way it is?

  2. Theres something wrong there.

    He pushed you, shouted abuse, and was being a general cunt. Its assault on his part. if he was insisting on being a cunt, then there wasn't a lot else you could have done. I'd certainly have whacked him.
  3. unfortunately mate. yeah... to start off with i was well proud and was telling everything with tits that i was in the army, more often than not it got me into trouble. nowadays i rely on them to work it out for themselves

    walk away mate. easiest solution. if he finds you again then pan him. you were left with no other choice he obviously wanted a ruck.

    believe it or not the humble squaddies story of self control up untill the last wont work when interrogated by the politzei. there are enough meatheads causing trouble downtown with civvies for us to have used up the "it wasnt my fault guv" card

    in a unit fighting is frowned upon... so dont get caught... good luck
  4. Thick skins
    Dont tell everyone your a squaddie (would you tell peeps you were an optician, baker, bin man etc) you will look enough like one no need to spout off about it
    Students in Oxford hate everyone who is not a student its not typical of everywhere
  5. Never did find out what happened to the girl though.

    It's just really fcuking irritating. I had to call up one of my mates who was inside the club and tell him I'd been kicked out.

    It's not like I was standing on a table screaming 'I'll cry when I'm done killing!' I was just chatting a girl up, ad libbing after she worked ou that I wasn't studying bio-chemistry.

    What I want to know is what's going out as a squaddie like? Endless fun, or just fights with mouthy students?
  6. Walt alert.
  7. Fcuk off mate, I'm not walting, I'm not pretending to be in the army, I'm trying to find out what it's like to BE one before I'm in.
  8. :frustrated: Walt Alert. :frustrated:

    *calls for the rest of the pack*
  9. I thought walting was pretending to be in the army when you weren't, like all those Airsoft types? Nah guys, come on, I'm not pretending to be a soldier, because I'm not one.

    I only passed selection a month ago, and I'm having to wait until June before I start.

    A bit rubbish but there you go.

    Whatever, just let the walt-burning begin...
  10. Ask the hippy kunt; 'What's the difference between a truck full of dead babies and a truck full of ball bearings? - Answer - You can't unload the ball-bearings with a pitchfork!'

    Alternatively remember you need to rely on controlled aggression - don't let the kunts wind you up. Rise above it and then shag the random bird then the hippies' missus. :thumright:

    CC_TA (From Oxford)

    Hope you punched the kunt a gooden though!!!
  11. She probably had dreadlocks too...not my thing, probably hairy downstairs as well.

    I'll try the irony next time.
  12. Rise above it mate and good luck as a CMT! (Try Reading on the lash - always good for a giggle!)

  13. going out as a squaddie: good laugh, when you live and work with a good bunch of mates you end up with some cracking stories of beer fuelled shagging and embarrassment. mostly both.

    as a civvie i used to think some of my best nights out were the ones where we had loads of people go out (about 5-10 of us) in germany we used to go out as a troop of 30 lads and get up to all sorts. we always had a duty photographer for the "sunday night debrief" of the nights out we had that week. people asleep on the bar covered in marker pen naked, one of the NIGs passed out, one of your mates getting off with a horror. plus some other stuff but the previous was every week and it never got less funny. just check some of the threads on here of the good times people has had. im pretty sure the social life is the only thing keeping me in the army these days.
  14. work on a good cover story and your halfway there. the more obscure the better. chances are in a squaddie town youd get outted immediately but its good for shits and giggles.

    theres a seperate thread on here on arrse users fave cover stories.

    being in the army can be a shit magnet, most civvies see you as a threat for being out in a large group or laying on the patter with thier missus and succeeding.

    good luck fella.
  15. Fcuk that. You were right. But you should have judo chopped his neck then told the bird its an unnarmed combat move you learnt on selection off dinger the jap slapper!