I want to join the Army, but my family is against it. What should I do?

I told my mother the other day, she thinks I'm insane and is totally against it. She's worried that war will break out and I'll be killed or have my legs blown off. My sister and grandmother, who are the only other people in the family who I'm close with, don't know yet but I guarantee that they'll act the same way. I know that I'm over 18 and don't need their permission, but I'd rather have their blessing (and not their nagging, LOL). Plus I don't want them worried. I've always wanted to join the Army and I know that I'll regret it if I don't. There's no other job I can think of that I'd like to do at the moment, plus I left school with no qualifications. Life is pretty boring right now and I think that I need to follow my dreams. Any ideas on how to bring them round?
 
What trade/arm were you thinking of for starters?
 
If you have had this as a dream for a long time and you don't have a go at achieving it, you run the risk of it eating away at you. In 20 years time, do you want to be looking back and still thinking "What might have been"?
 
Give it one more attempt at getting their blessing, then just go for it.

Don't live your life based on other peoples anxieties.
You're no more at risk in green than you are doing any job
 
Worse thing in life as you get older are what ifs. Personally I would say go for it and follow your dream, there is a chance you will hate it, but there is that chance you will love it and have a full and fulfilling career, but at least you can sit back later in life and say, I tried.
 
I told my mother the other day, she thinks I'm insane and is totally against it. She's worried that war will break out and I'll be killed or have my legs blown off. My sister and grandmother, who are the only other people in the family who I'm close with, don't know yet but I guarantee that they'll act the same way. I know that I'm over 18 and don't need their permission, but I'd rather have their blessing (and not their nagging, LOL). Plus I don't want them worried. I've always wanted to join the Army and I know that I'll regret it if I don't. There's no other job I can think of that I'd like to do at the moment, plus I left school with no qualifications. Life is pretty boring right now and I think that I need to follow my dreams. Any ideas on how to bring them round?
If you are over 18, do it, join what you want and enjoy it. It is a very different army to what I and many here joined over 34 years ago, but still a great life and good fun.

Go on, you know you want to.
 
I told my mother the other day, she thinks I'm insane and is totally against it. She's worried that war will break out and I'll be killed or have my legs blown off. My sister and grandmother, who are the only other people in the family who I'm close with, don't know yet but I guarantee that they'll act the same way. I know that I'm over 18 and don't need their permission, but I'd rather have their blessing (and not their nagging, LOL). Plus I don't want them worried. I've always wanted to join the Army and I know that I'll regret it if I don't. There's no other job I can think of that I'd like to do at the moment, plus I left school with no qualifications. Life is pretty boring right now and I think that I need to follow my dreams. Any ideas on how to bring them round?
My family, my doctor and my friends were against it.
I did it anyway.
It's your life, not theirs.
 
All Wot they said, just do it, life's too short for regrets, and if you don't at some point in the future you will look back and say, "what if! " On your pass out parade, your family will be so proud, AND YOU WILL BE WALKING 10 FEET TALL. if it doesn't suit you, at least you can say you tried,. When you do sign up, FFS get a trade, it will stand you in good stead when you finally come out. Good luck with what ever you do,... be lucky! :salut:
 
My family, my doctor and my friends were against it.
I did it anyway.
It's your life, not theirs.

My parents were happy I was moving out. I was the last of three.

I even made then go the Police Station to have a Plod witness the parental consent form. I was 15½

My mum didn't even see me to the train platform to wave me off to Basic. Dropped me off in the Car Park
 

CRmeansCeilingReached

ADC
Moderator
I told my mother the other day, she thinks I'm insane and is totally against it. She's worried that war will break out and I'll be killed or have my legs blown off. My sister and grandmother, who are the only other people in the family who I'm close with, don't know yet but I guarantee that they'll act the same way. I know that I'm over 18 and don't need their permission, but I'd rather have their blessing (and not their nagging, LOL). Plus I don't want them worried. I've always wanted to join the Army and I know that I'll regret it if I don't. There's no other job I can think of that I'd like to do at the moment, plus I left school with no qualifications. Life is pretty boring right now and I think that I need to follow my dreams. Any ideas on how to bring them round?

If you want genuine advice (in addition to "go for it"):
  • Stop thinking of joining "the Army" and start taking a careful look at the trades available to you.
  • Start planning now for your life after the Army (however many years away that may be). Some Army roles set you up for "life part 2" better than others.
  • You mention lack of quals on leaving school. Some trades will provide opportunities to gain excellent qualifications, which you can develop further during your career.
And in terms of presentation to the family:
  • Present it to your mum etc as a second chance to gain qualifications, experience (and mates you'll never forget). Emphasise the education and trade opportunities.
  • Play down your chances of getting through training: "I'll probably fail / quit anyway." Don't present it as a fait accompli - you just want to give it a try, and you might hate it and be back home in a few weeks.
  • Don't present it as a permanent career (even if that's your plan). Say you're just thinking of doing 4 years max. (once you're in, they'll find it easier to accept you changing your long-term plans a couple of years down the line.)
  • Emphasise that it's been your dream and it would be nice to have the support of your family, even if they don't understand the attraction.
  • If you've got any positive role model family / friends who have served, that might help.
  • When they see you ironing your own kit, disciplined, self-confident etc they will understand the positive benefits of joining the British Army. (My brother had one CSE and zero career prospects. He joined the Army and was transformed when he came back on leave. Ended up with some decent engineering qualifications and was better-qualified to get work on leaving the mob.)
You're hardly the first to enter the Army with limited quals. I dropped out of school with GCSEs to join the Army... and left 26 years later, with a Masters degree and shitloads of brilliant experiences.

And yeah, just go for it. :)
 
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I told my mother the other day, she thinks I'm insane and is totally against it. She's worried that war will break out and I'll be killed or have my legs blown off. My sister and grandmother, who are the only other people in the family who I'm close with, don't know yet but I guarantee that they'll act the same way. I know that I'm over 18 and don't need their permission, but I'd rather have their blessing (and not their nagging, LOL). Plus I don't want them worried. I've always wanted to join the Army and I know that I'll regret it if I don't. There's no other job I can think of that I'd like to do at the moment, plus I left school with no qualifications. Life is pretty boring right now and I think that I need to follow my dreams. Any ideas on how to bring them round?
Try dragging them to a few engagement events.

Often naivety of what the armed forces actually do feeds the "legs blown off" speech. @AsterixTG asked you about choice of trade, this makes a difference too. But, even of you go infantry, a visit to changing of the guard, or trooping of the colour strikes the potential "proud mum" moment.

Look out for open days - AR centre, perhaps, and let them talk to serving bods. After all more SP's have worked in the front line of the NHS in the last two years than have fired a shot in anger. If you go to a technical corps then emphasise the free training, nay paid training. . Even driving is a good step into the civilian world @jagman2 posted, only today, that HGV rates are now hitting £58,000 per annum

.Eventually the message will sink in

Of course, whilst all this in hand, start your application - it can take a long time.

ETA: @CRmeansCeilingReached typed quicker than I, and said it better.
 
I told my mother the other day, she thinks I'm insane and is totally against it. She's worried that war will break out and I'll be killed or have my legs blown off. My sister and grandmother, who are the only other people in the family who I'm close with, don't know yet but I guarantee that they'll act the same way. I know that I'm over 18 and don't need their permission, but I'd rather have their blessing (and not their nagging, LOL). Plus I don't want them worried. I've always wanted to join the Army and I know that I'll regret it if I don't. There's no other job I can think of that I'd like to do at the moment, plus I left school with no qualifications. Life is pretty boring right now and I think that I need to follow my dreams. Any ideas on how to bring them round?
Are you living your life for yourself, or your family?
 

Pagan-Image

War Hero
What trade/arm were you thinking of for starters?
Seriously think about this, just because you don't have any current qualifications doesn't mean you wont get some. There will be a life after the military.

As stated try and talk to your family again, most civilians think ARMY and only imagine what they have seen on the News. Yes it is a risk, but no greater risk than being run over (in fact its less of a risk). If you have any old and bold, or veteran groups in the area, speak to them to get a better feel for the life, they will be able to give you better information to give to your family.

Points to note

- Pension (You will realise how important this is as you get older)
- Dental (In civvie street this cost a fortune)
- Driving licence (Most trades)
- Friendships
- Opportunity

You will also see and experience times that are not so much fun, but generally this is overshadowed by the positives.

Edited to add...

I joined age 24 after being expelled from school, flunking college and working in a Rover dealership for 7 years.

After 15 years in the Army, I now have two engineering degrees (as you can tell definitely not in English), I have a very well paid senior job in a FTSE 100 company which involves advising governments on anti-counterfeiting technologies for secure documents and systems.

I have a house, a family and everything I wanted in life...

Not everyone ends up on a street corner.
 
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W21A

LE
Book Reviewer
Do it.
Quote by older brother. "You'll go to Northern Ireland and get your head blown off."

Well I'm still here and had a lot of fun.

ETA

“Every man thinks meanly of himself for not having been a soldier, or not having been at sea.”​

 

OldTimer

War Hero
Above mentions pension , I am nearly 80 and after 22 yers in the Army pension I get is more than the state pension and makes a hell of a difference to our standard of living . Go for it
 

Daxx

MIA
Book Reviewer
War may break out and an occupational hazard in the military is death, but you are more likely to die in a road traffic collision driving to the chippy.

Pick a trade and join up. If unsure, join the Army Reserve first which you can do alongside a 'normal' civvy job.
 
War may break out and an occupational hazard in the military is death, but you are more likely to die in a road traffic collision driving to the chippy.

Pick a trade and join up. If unsure, join the Army Reserve first which you can do alongside a 'normal' civvy job.
In my Army career, more people I knew died in RTAs going to/coming back from leave (2), than died in training or on Ops (0).
 
Shave your head into a green mohican. Get some piercings. Walk around in a studded leather jacket, PVC drainpipes, studded belts, wristbands etc. And have a right stroppy attitude.
My folks couldn't wait to get rid of me. My appearance, my actions, atrocities, and my mannerisms brought great shame upon them. If there hadn't been any train warrants, my dad would have driven me there himself.
 

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