I WANT TO BE A TEENAGER AGAIN!!!

#1
I have been in a bit of a odd mood for the last week or so. I have not been able to put my finger on why or what is causing this until I started to sort out my iTunes today. I've been listening to Nirvana, nine inch nails, Metallica, Black Sabbath, Blue Oyster Cult, Bloodhound Gang, Lead Zeppelin and all the other music I listened to when I was a teenager in the 1990's getting drunk, smoking and chasing girls in short skirts and loose knickers.
Now 6 months ago I moved in with the wifelet and my booze and fag intake has dropped through the fecking floor. Six Months ago I would guzzle about 15 - 20 pints a week and smoke when ever I want to. If I went out with the lads on a weekends I would get drunk..... well sh!t faced would be a better description, but nothing a dirty kebab on the way home and a fry up in the morning could not sort out. Now when I'm out I have to behave myself because of the other half. Waking up naked in a fireplace next to a pool of beer and vomit is not deemed "Romantic" in this day and age.
In short I'm turning 30 this year, I'm scared and I want to be a teenager again, the 1990's rocked!!!! the 00's are a bit pants.

I've tried combating my lust for beer by baking a batch of blueberry muffins and hoovering the flat but it's no good, I'm off to the pub to drink and smoke.




P.S Please don't tell the missus that I'm smoking or she will give me a bolloking :D
 
#2
Jeez LVH, baking blueberry muffins!!! You need help. Run, don't turn round for goodness sake, just keep running. Don't bother removing your pinnie!!

I've got a significant birthday coming up this year and I feel exactly the same. Life is stagnant, no I'd go as far to say boring. But I draw the line at baking muffins to feel better!
 

Biped

LE
Book Reviewer
#4
Don't get me started! There's still time to make change. I missed the boat and it's too late for me. I have a 'chores list', drink wine, not lager and (may the great spaghetti monster in the sky save me) . . . I listen to Radio Two and laugh at Wogan.

Edited to add: When I'm alone in my car and feeling particularly naughty, I may be found listening to Massive Attack or Prodigy at full tilt.
 
#5
I wish I had the confidence I have now, coupled with my body at age 20.
God I feel miserable now LVH. What have you started?
 
#6
You could do what I did.

I had an 19 yr old girlfriend until recently, she used to blast out loads of goth sh!te, mushroom head, cradle of filth, system of a down, and a few other assorted whiney american bands.

She was thick as f**k as well, didn't even know who the primeminister was and used to use long words in the wrong context to sound intelligent, she was also one of those stupid people who blame dyslexia for just being thick.

Her days off work she used to stay in bed till 12:00hrs so nothing ever got done.

I'm looking for a nice MILF now who'll do my dinner for me and taxi me around.
 
#8
FatBoyGeorge said:
Fuck me, I was having a good day. I've had cold feet since de-mobbing and still looking for change although a new daughter has saved me for a while. But not all is lost, I've been high as a kite on hayfever drugs all day.
:clap:

Thanks FBG, I haven't got hayfever, but I'm going via the chemist on the way home now!
 

Biped

LE
Book Reviewer
#9
Welcome, welcome, come in, you must be the new guys and gals.

Everyone, we have some new members in the grumpy old bast@rds self-help group I'd like you to meet, let's give them a big hello!

Hello . . . Hello . . . Hi . . . Pleased to meet you, I'm Kevin . . . and I'm Sharon.
 
#11
Mr_Deputy said:
what DID you do? None of that makes sense unless you tell us how old you are - Mark.
Take it you respected your bit of Goth then?
Funny thing about 'dating' (shagging) MILFs is the way they like to choose dark pubs/bars/restaurants or sit in the darker parts of those establishments to hide the age!
Mid-twenties, she didn't dress like I goth at all so it was false advertising.
 
#12
Wishful_Thinking said:
FatBoyGeorge said:
Fuck me, I was having a good day. I've had cold feet since de-mobbing and still looking for change although a new daughter has saved me for a while. But not all is lost, I've been high as a kite on hayfever drugs all day.
:clap:

Thanks FBG, I haven't got hayfever, but I'm going via the chemist on the way home now!
Whishful, you want Piriton Alergy Tablets. Just make sure your near something soft to land on though.
 
#16
Im still 22 in my head. Comes as a surprise sometimes when I see this decripit 42 year old body in a mirror.
On the positive side,Im sleepinng with a 21 yr old lass,sings in an acid folk band so its not all bad :D
In fact,shes just phoned up,Im off to the Frog in manc tonight :D
 
#17
Airfix said:
30 this year? You fcuking child!

Airfix, 40-something and missing the years before girl power...
Ahem46 but still living the life of an older teenager 8O
 
#19
Bollox - i'm 30 this year too.................

Thank fcuk i've not started baking the blueberry muffins yet!!!!!!
 
#20
Fcuk all that. I wouldn't relive my teenage years for any amount of money. I was high all the time, confused and attracted to guys I thought I could "fix." A complete idiot, in short. (As opposed to a partial idiot now.)

And I DEFINITELY wouldn't want to be a teenager in the Age of the ASBO.
 

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