I wanna be a homosexual.

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Machristo, Jul 10, 2007.

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  1. Is a great punk song by Screeching Weasels. My question though is thus: Is there an underlying psychological complex that results in my liking this song, and my not liking (quite as much) Sloppy Seconds' song, I Don't Wanna Be a Homosexual? Or am I just talking (rather than thinking about) b0ll0cks?
  2. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

  3. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    I am a confirmed follower of Lesbos.
  4. And I have Been on the Conversion course :wink:
  5. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Lesbians arent gay. They're art.

    OK Machristo. Do you use product?

    Know the name of your hairdresser?

    Can you knock up a quiche without a recipe?

    Have opinions on curtains?

    Whats your take on Barbara Striesland?

    Who had better uniforms - the Waffen SS or Montgomery?
  6. Given the title of the thread, all you have to do is take it up the bum - non?

    Or are there higher criteria for the more discerning Queer?
  7. Tresemme shampoo, Garnier Fructis conditioner, three different types of hair gel (old shool gel, wax and fibre putty) although not all at once, my barber is Brian, although I sometimes let Lisa (my best mates next door neighbour) loose on it. I can't do quiche, but I do make a gorgeous two cheese, spinach and pesto lasagne. As for curtains, no particular opinions. Babs- wtf mate?!? and finally uniforms? The Schutzstaffel, obviously.

    So, how did I do? Gay. straight or require further testing?
  8. I think the only definitive test would be to leave you alone in a room with a marrow, a tube of KY and the complete series of Sex & the City.

    If you come out 'intact' and able to walk correctly (not like John Wayne) then I think it's safe to say you're a Hetero tiger.

    Failing that, only one question needs to be asked.....
    "Do you push back?"

  9. Nop, T-O-W all the way, i pull back, with my heels dug in. :D which brings me to an interesting point actually, off to the arty forum I go....
  10. I thought you were only a gayer if you closed the door?! :?
  11. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    I heard it was only if you are the reciever?
  12. I once knew a very misled lad who opined that you were only gay if you took it up the ricker or put in your mouth, and that it was perfectly hetero to accept a BJ from another man or shove your c0ck up his sh1tter provided you never touched his schlong. I believe he is now to be found as the only straight in The P2, which I am reliably informed is an establishment for the less moralistic members of our sex.
  13. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    I got a couple of mates 'got on the wrong bus' in places like Thailand. When asked their response, and expecting "I threw it out the window", they both replied along the lines of "Too late. By that time I was in love".

    Mates. MATES. I said mates, not me, all right?
  14. Yoo hoo, hello sailor!

    I hate to break this to you son, but you're gayer than the Brighton & Hove Transexual Judy Garland Appreciation Society.