I think Ive found my own pub walt.

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by cmt...hopefully, Apr 16, 2007.

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  1. I'm working in a little pub in South West London. I've got 8 weeks till phase 1, so I'm just biding my time, counting off the days...

    Chatting to my regulars, one mentioned that he had been in the army. He says he was in the REME, back in the 70s. Apparently he was medically discharged after 3 years due to a back injury.

    Oh wait, he also claims he was made the trade equivalent of an RSM, what he called a Quartermaster Sergeant, whilst in hospital. I said that 3 years sounded a bit quick, and he claimed that there when the slot was open, there was no-one to fill it, so it had to be him.

    He also claims to have been given the choice of jail or the forces, because he was too old for borstal, and too young for prison...He also claimed to work with THEM, but he can't talk about it, because it's still classified.

    Have I stumbled across a brilliant pub walt?

    Any suggestions from anyone to help me out him/make him sweat?
  2. ask him his regimental number. that usually gets them sweating.

    if he was reme then ask him what "arte et marte" means. chances are he will get it, but no excuse at all if he doesnt.

    sounds like a walt. he ticks all the right boxes
  3. Just address him as Sir from now on as he is one major walt :)
  4. yeah, keep feeding him walt sweeties, might bring out some more war stories..
  5. Write them all down in the back room or after shift. That way you can spot for glaring mistakes on his part.

    Although so far so good.

    RSM/QM Sgt in 3 years!!!! Flyer. Likewise I think the QM Sgt is actually a Cavalry rank from before 1914!!! Still used by the Irish and Canadians I think.
  6. Ask him about the nemisis file :D .A barking mad book about the sas
    secretly killing people in Northern Ireland .
    Turned out to be drunken ramblings of a ex reme walt ,but,not before he had to have a chat with the ruc who had been digging where he claimed the bodies were buried .Dont think they offred him coffee :D
  7. Poor deluded man! Tell him if he's gonna Walt it to do it properly, at least claim he invented the SAS or something. Couldn't he have come up with something better than 'Royal Engineers Minus Education'. :D
  8. ask him if he likes to wear a dress and be called judy. i think that's what some REME "sergeant majors" do :)
  9. old_fat_and_hairy

    old_fat_and_hairy LE Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    I reckon the bloke is telling the truth. His career echoes my own, although his is not as glorious. I came in as a sgt, having been an air cadet. The army obviously recognised my talents, so instead of basic training, I was sent on the underwater sniper course, which only took me 3 days, before skipping selection and going straight to command a troop in THEM! Having won several 'police actions', almost single-handed, I became an instructor at Sandhurst, as a WO11, all this, bearing in mind I had only been in service for 16 months.
    They kept asking me to take a comission, and go straight to Lt Col, but I turned it down. Hated to be parted from my mates. Eventually, after 2 years and being promoted to RSM of the entire army, I left because MI5 wanted me to head up the new action wing, but I can't really talk about that. Just have to watch the film they made about me, with some bloke named Craig playing me.
    Despite having been wounde over 14 times, I am now competing in the next olympics, while still secretly telling Alan Sugar what to do. But now that I am nearly 20, not sure what to do with rest of my life.
    So, your R.E.M.E guy is dead kosher, mate!
  10. Cherish and nurture your Walt. Coax him for more of his dangerous exploits. Eventually, when you destroy him the pleasure is ....is....too much for words

    My walt moved away. How I miss that wee bootneck Sergeant Major who was trained by the Para's AND the Foreign Legion *sniff*
  11. Good post. Under no circumstances out this Walt before you have the full life history :!: Start by getting dates from him (as in timings NOT see you after work - its not illegal but it shouldn't be encouraged) and make a note of them - then go back to said dates several weeks later. I'll bet they change :twisted: Do keep people informed.
  12. I have a slightly different problem with what I suspect may be a walt here.

    The guy who looks after the airconditioning in our office claims to be an ex DDR LtCol. Now he looks the part and talks the talk as far as we here can tell, there are a couple of ex conscripts of the BRD Army in the office, but some how I am not completely convinced.

    How the hell can I tell whether this guy is a excommie walt or not?
  13. Why bullsh1t about being in the REME? What does he have to gain - if you're going to blag it you'd at least make it interesting!

    I believe him - buy the man a beer!
  14. 1. He may have done his basic training at Poperinghe Barracks Arborfield. Ask him if he remembers the spider burning down in '71. I believe the remains were there for some time afterwards.
    2. If he was an AQMS (= WO2) call him sir. A genuine AQMS will inform you politely that he prefers to be addressed as "Q" (something about working for a living?).

    Happy hunting. :D
  15. Ask him about his time at the DDR Heeresoffizierschule and his Party Membership - see what he says.