I only forward these things !

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous Jokes' started by rationpack, Sep 3, 2011.

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  1. There was a Scottish painter named Hamish Macgregor who was very interested in making a penny where it could, so he regularly thinned down his paint to make it go just a wee bit further.

    As it happened, he got away with this for some time, but eventually the Wee Frees decided to do a restoration job on the outside of one of their largest buildings.
    Hamish put in a bid, and, because his price was so low, he got the job.
    So he set about erecting the scaffolding and setting up the planks, and buying the paint and, yes, I am sorry to say, thinning it down with water...

    Well, Hamish was up on the scaffolding, painting away, the job nearly completed, when suddenly there was a horrendous clap of thunder, the sky opened, and the rain poured down washing the thinned paint from all over the church and knocking Hamish clear off the scaffold to land on the lawn among the gravestones, surrounded by telltale puddles of the thinned and useless paint.

    Hamish was no fool. He knew this was a judgment from the Almighty,
    so he got down on his knees and cried:
    "Oh, God, Oh God, forgive me; what should I do?"
    And from the thunder, a mighty voice spoke

    "Repaint! Repaint! And thin no more!"
    • Like Like x 3
  2. Shoot yourself.
  3. Oh come on,it`s not that bad. Try thinking Andy Stewart. "There was a painter , a Scottish painter, who wandered far away and painted far away etc"
  4. HHH

    HHH LE

    Repent, Repent, and post no more.
  5. Shoot "rationpack" then shoot yourself.
  6. I read the first line. Lost the plot. Boring load of bollocks.
  7. You are supposed to use your imagination and think of something which might amuse people who were bored by the preceeding bollocks. Balls in your court, Oscar.
  8. Well I skipped the middle bit and got to 'Repaint repaint and don't thin no more.'

    Yeah right ............

  9. I don't get it.
  10. Oh...I get it now.