I need work over Christmas

Oyibo

LE
7 in-laws inbound to my sanctuary of peace over Christmas and New Year to turn it into a crucible of bitching, bickering, backstabbing, and blubbering.

Does anyone have any gainful employment over Christmas that I can take as an excuse to get away form the morale vacuum that will descend upon my house?
 

BratMedic

LE
Book Reviewer
Have you ever thought about Panto? Widow Wanky might be an option.
 
7 in-laws inbound to my sanctuary of peace over Christmas and New Year to turn it into a crucible of bitching, bickering, backstabbing, and blubbering.

Does anyone have any gainful employment over Christmas that I can take as an excuse to get away form the morale vacuum that will descend upon my house?
I think we should meet up to discuss potential work possibilities: there's a useful 'office' in Paquis, just behind the Noga Hilton.
 
Sit outside a bank with a bit of cardboard with the message "Hopeless, please help me fund a bed for the night. (All credit/debit cards accepted)." :cool:
 

Wordsmith

LE
Book Reviewer
Go to your local department store.

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If you have a convincing 'ho ho ho', you'll get the job.

(You'll need a high tolerance for screaming kids).

Wordsmith :smile:
 
Have you ever thought about Panto? Widow Wanky might be an option.
The local panto in Geneva is already into final stages of rehearsal: performances early Dec.
Interesting factoid: When he was at CERN, a chap called Tim Berners-Lee was renowned for his performances as Dame in the Geneva panto.
 

Oyibo

LE
I think we should meet up to discuss potential work possibilities: there's a useful 'office' in Paquis, just behind the Noga Hilton.
The way this Christmas is panning out I'd consider anything short of the lead role in a snuff movie. I can be at the casting couch in Paquis at short notice.
 
The way this Christmas is panning out I'd consider anything short of the lead role in a snuff movie. I can be at the casting couch in Paquis at short notice.
Apart from that, surely there's need for Chalet Dollies close to your place?
 

Sammer

War Hero
You’re not really selling yourself there. What skills can bring? Languages? Are you available 24/7? For $10/hour you can escort retired Europeans around Lima for a couple of weeks.
 
1)Explain you have found God and believe in the lying wee Bronze Age tart on a donkey. You believe He may set an example of retribution for the commerciality.
That will set the tone.

Now, as follows:
2) Grate Exlax on chocolate everything.
3) Under cook the turkey.
4) Disable TV media, and bring Xmas Carol hymn sheets out for "entertainment".
5) Inform the local Mormons you seek a minister for the day...can they assist?
6)Take the fuse out the Xmas lights. In fact, isolate from the fuse-box all the principal rooms.

(By 2/3pm, they will have evacuated their bowels & guts, be freezing to death, and paying triple-rate cabs home probably with bin bags tied around their waist.)

7) Settle down when they are gone, and pop the M&S Xmas meal for two in the oven...which has miraculously switched on again.;)

They will not likely ever come back...and with good fortune one or two may kark it in the New Year if you do your job right.
 
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7 in-laws inbound to my sanctuary of peace over Christmas and New Year to turn it into a crucible of bitching, bickering, backstabbing, and blubbering.

Does anyone have any gainful employment over Christmas that I can take as an excuse to get away form the morale vacuum that will descend upon my house?
Too bad that's not a moral vacuum, lots of Arrsers would've been willing to keep you company
 

Oyibo

LE
You’re not really selling yourself there. What skills can bring? Languages? Are you available 24/7? For $10/hour you can escort retired Europeans around Lima for a couple of weeks.
English and French, and a smidge of Portugese and Russian. I'll f*cking learn Spanish in 7 days to get out of this one.
 
7 in-laws inbound to my sanctuary of peace over Christmas and New Year to turn it into a crucible of bitching, bickering, backstabbing, and blubbering.

Does anyone have any gainful employment over Christmas that I can take as an excuse to get away form the morale vacuum that will descend upon my house?
You better put your tree up now, and make sure your outdoor lights are up to par.

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Only 5 more weeks until Christmas Eve!
 

Oyibo

LE
Apart from that, surely there's need for Chalet Dollies close to your place?
On the lines of the very successful 'Snow Bunnies', I was thinking perhaps:
  • Snow stud;
  • Piste pimp;
  • Gondola gigolo;
  • etc.
I suspect business could be slow!
 

Auld-Yin

ADC
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
Reviews Editor
I am due to have a lovely Christmas. My daughter and her hubby are going on holiday over Christmas and my son will be working so I will be left alone to enjoy the "Peace" that every TV Sleb wishes everyone for Xmas!

Bliss!!!! :santa:
 
I am due to have a lovely Christmas. My daughter and her hubby are going on holiday over Christmas and my son will be working so I will be left alone to enjoy the "Peace" that every TV Sleb wishes everyone for Xmas!

Bliss!!!! :santa:
That's what SWMBO & I had in store.
Now it seems....we may be flown out to Copenhagen FOC courtesy of son...to "meet" possible future Viking-sort relos.
Not much we can do really....:(
 
I am due to have a lovely Christmas. My daughter and her hubby are going on holiday over Christmas and my son will be working so I will be left alone to enjoy the "Peace" that every TV Sleb wishes everyone for Xmas!

Bliss!!!! :santa:
I hope my kids will be up by 0600. Off to the parents at 0930 ish then home by 1430. Then we must watch A Christmas Story at least once.
 

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