I need some advice on getting in touch with someone.

#1
edit:

I have the information I needed, and see no point in leaving my original post up. Thank you, thank you, thank you to those who helped, and to those who sent kind, thoughtful PMs.

I'm going to walk away from the computer now because otherwise those ********* who are trying to upset me further might succeed. For what it's worth, chaps, I hope nobody you're close to ever loses a pregnancy. But if they do (and if you even have any self-awareness at all) I hope you'll think back to this thread, and feel a bit f*cking ashamed of yourselves.
 
#5
COMS/Recce....if you can't be useful or helpful then don't bother.....give the girl a break

Hedy - unfortunately some guys do that...being away on tour, coming back, it can all be a massive readjustment and takes time. Sometimes things can all be too much. So sadly you've had to find out right at the point when you need to let him know something important. To send a letter to him you will need:

his army number, his rank, his initial and surname
as much of his Regiment detail as you know (eg: B Coy 4 SCOTS)
the baracks he is in
a BFPO number if he is in NI or overseas (or as much of the address as you know)

That should reach him....but please don't expect a reply

Hope that helps

Look after you - take time to heal





edited to add some important stuff
 
#6
If you know the Barracks he is in then your plan with the letter should work OK.

You could also try sending a message on Faceache to one of his good mates as a last resort.

Good luck and sorry about your dilemma. Many blokes on here will have been on the other end of this story, I have.
 
#7
They can be an uncaring bunch sometimes here. Your more likely to get useful advice from arrse's sister sight for families.
 
#8
hedychium_coronarium said:
Thank you for your constructive advice, chaps. I should have known better, right?
If you've been with him that long, then you'll know his unit and sub unit address, so just write to him (recorded delivery so you know he received it). Failing that, have a word with one of his mates and ask him to pass on a simple message that only he would understand.
 
#10
Do you have a recent photograph?
 

Fugly

ADC
DirtyBAT
#12
hedychium_coronarium said:
I don't want to message his mother on facebook because I've never met her; it's rather tasteless; and it would just make things so much worse for him.
Assuming this isn't a wind up.......... :roll:

If you don't have his up to date unit address, but still have this method of getting the info to him, then use it. It might be "tasteless" but at least the bloke will know.
 
#13
Fugly said:
Assuming this isn't a wind up.......... :roll:
Careful Fugly, you'll have blueygirl berating you. :roll:
 
#14
Of course it's a wind up, 2½ years in and she doesn't know any of his family or mates nor his unit address, not likely.

In case it isn't a wind up, get down to Netto, buy two bottles of cheap vodka, drink and repeat daily.

Why not become a lesbian?

(If you do this can you post some pictures)
 
#15
I kind of can't believe I'm responding to that ... but I'm pissed off now, so:


Don't be bloody ridiculous; of course I know his bloody mates; it's him who doesn't know mine, because I've always preferred to keep him at arms' length. If you were in his position, would you want some bird telling your mates (who, if you're anything like him, you won't even have told about the situation anyway) that she'd just miscarried your child and would they please pass the message on to you? No. Thought not.

I'm eighteen months older than him; late twenties; had more experience with relationships//with relationships ending. We started seeing each other just after I broke up with the love of my life; it was down to me that it was just an arrangement in the first place. Meeting one another's families has never been on the cards. The whole thing suited me because it saved having to get involved with anyone else and possibly get hurt. Ok?

I'm disappointed that he's not as much of a man as I thought he was. But I'm not going to waste too many tears on him. I've just lost a baby I never thought I'd have. There are more important things than caring about some man-child squaddie. I just need him to know what's happened.
 

Fugly

ADC
DirtyBAT
#16
He's not going to give a toss about your "previous relationship" history right now, and neither do we. Please spare us. If you have a method of telling him that he isn't going to be expecting a letter from the CSA, then use it. Even if it does mean sending his mum a message. It's not like you'll have anything to do with him or his family afterwards anyway.

Cut loose.

Option B) Fuck off, Wedge!
 
#19
hedychium_coronarium said:
I kind of can't believe I'm responding to that ... but I'm pissed off now, so:

*Snip*

If you were in his position, would you want some bird telling your mates (who, if you're anything like him, you won't even have told about the situation anyway) that she'd just miscarried your child and would they please pass the message on to you? No. Thought not.

*Snip*
If that was aimed at my suggestion, then please point out where I said that would be the message to convey to him. :roll:

What I said was:
...Failing that, have a word with one of his mates and ask him to pass on a simple message that only he would understand.
If this is a wind up, then it's a crap one.
 
#20
I have spent 5 minutes scowering the internet, and I can't believe that no-one makes a "Congratualtions, it's a stillborn" card?!!?! WTF?!!
 
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