I#m fucked

#1
Edited for being too drunk to type
 
#4
if you love your wife then you won't cheat full stop.........ah unless your a typical squaddie then your buggered huh
 
#5
Barry_Trotter said:
I am in the extremley unfortunate position of attacheched to a scychotic biatch of the German persuasion. From reading dead reaplies on the TROLL site, I am now in need of really helpfull advise. (Please take note that helpfu8ll advice would not come frome RTFQ( too obvious), TL FH( too blacckadder) TMDN, I want to salvage my marriage and not go to Kai tai#s and lady boys. This might sound so square but i do love my wife.!!!


tandby for fi for larddie arse sf fire for being a wimp :oops: :roll:
Are you one of Anya's relations - or one of her mates from the dyslexia class
 
#6
You don't want it, but tough. Here's my opinion.

I don't do marriage, but don't slag yourself off for loving your wife, it makes you the bigger man.

If you've got major problems, use this site to get them off your chest if you want (seeing them on a screen in front of you helps you work out what your thinking) maybe not on this forum (but all the clever ones are here :wink: ).

Once you've done that TALK TO YER WIFE. talking to us won't save fcuk all ultimately.

Use a mediator if you both have got to the stage where it's difficult /impossible to talk to each other without screaming. It sounds naff but they're like a ref in boxing, otherwise you may as well mill. RELATE seem to work for some people.

Don't give up.
 
#7
Ok so you have a Psychotic German wife with some problems!!! Explain the problems in a manner we can understand then maybe if you are luck someone will give you some sound advice.!!!

D.D.
 
#8
I do talk to my wife but she dosn't understand me. :(



I SPEAK NENGLISH 8O 8O

sHE SPEAKS GERMAN;;; :oops: :oops: :oops:
 
#10
Barry_Trotter said:
I do talk to my wife but she dosn't understand me. :(



I SPEAK NENGLISH 8O 8O

sHE SPEAKS GERMAN;;; :oops: :oops: :oops:
You could learn German
She could learn English
You could SHOUT!!!!
You could keep her incoherent with violent love making
You could kill her and get that new patio you've always wanted

Don't,whatever you do mention the war!!!!
 
#11
You must have been able to talk about stuff in the early days. Find out what used to be your common ground (footie, lesbianism, travel) and try to get talking about ANYTHING. Like I say, talk to a mediator, they explain things that neither of you can express because you're too angry/hurt/p1ssed to do yourself
 
#12
..........speaking different languages sounds like a good idea - if you can't understand each other how can you annoy/hut/piss each other off? :?
Just shag a lot :D
 
#14
You have my sympathy, my mother is German so I know from long experience that what we would assume to be psychotic behaviour, is in fact perfectly normal for your average frau.
From what I recall of my childhood, my fathers usual seduction technique involved Wagner and lederhosen, but I'm assuming that your leibling is younger than my mother, in which case you may want to substitute "Das Skorpions" for Wagner.
Other props that may help to create the correct ambience to woo a Valkerie are, plenty of Estrella, pork products, and a DVD of "Das Boot" :D

Best of British luck to you!
 
#16
Barry_Trotter said:
I do talk to my wife but she dosn't understand me. :(



I SPEAK NENGLISH 8O 8O

sHE SPEAKS GERMAN;;; :oops: :oops: :oops:
So how did you fall for each other/get married then? 8O Was it done as a rush job to get out of the block? or did you just lie with your head under the glass coffee table , she dropped her leiderhosen to lay a buffet leg on it, and you took it from there? :wink: :lol:
 
#18
yeh, i admit it, I can understand a little of boxhead sprache, that's how I got into my current situation. :? But that doesn't explain why i have a 3 RD reicht version of windows XP on MY computer and I have to goose step all over my keybourd(tasataur) to be european correct. :lol: :lol: :lol:
 
#19
sorry barry, I dont quite understand what your point is?

Are you asking us to teach you German so you can argue with your wife...or are you just trying to make arrse bitches feel sorry for you and give you one?
 
#20
Best advice I can give, mate, is........




Whatever you do, DON'T take my advice on relationships :oops:
 

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