Remember there are two types of Officer, those that piss in the sink and those that lie.Conversation at the dinner table - RA Regt Officers' Mess
LE Major: They've put a new sink in my room. For the first time I've got a sink no one has ever pissed in.
Devex: Until tonight!
LE Major: (indignant) Are you suggesting I still piss in my sink?
Lt Col at his usual head of the table seat: Well, I still piss in mine so why not?
You opened the conversation with "Hello, son," little knowing. ..I attended a RTC, the driver involved was a young squaddie, I asked for his driving licence to get some details for the paperwork. I asked where he was based and he replied Fallingbostel. I told him Fally was my last posting before leaving - then I noticed his date of birth - I was there before you were born! Then my training kicked in - I called him a ******* sprog and told him I'd spent longer in the NAAFI queue!
Twenty something years ago I was doing exactly that outside a barracks block in Yorkshire of a January morning. The unit scrounger asked me for a rollup and I started to roll it for him, when a big old dewdrop from my nose fell right onto the tobacco I was rolling out. Instantly my training kicked in as I carried on rolling and handed it to him without a moment's hesitation, then watched calmly as he started to have trouble with it about halfway through.I had a doctors appointment at 0800 hrs this morning but then I fell back on my training and showed up at 0430 hrs to stand outside the surgery smoking roll ups and whinging about how cold it was.