I have been on the receiving end

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous Jokes' started by The_Remover, Sep 13, 2010.

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  1. Ways to Turn Men Down

    HE: Can I buy you a drink?
    SHE: Actually I'd rather have the money.

    HE: I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours
    SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours..

    HE: Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
    SHE: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

    HE: How did you get to be so beautiful?
    SHE: I must've been given your share.

    HE: Will you go out with me this Saturday?
    SHE: Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.

    HE: Your face must turn a few heads.
    SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs.

    HE: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out.
    SHE: Okay, will you get out?

    HE: I think I could make you very happy.
    SHE: Why? Are you leaving?

    HE: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
    SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

    HE: Can I have your name?
    SHE: Why? Don't you already have one?

    HE: Shall we go see a movie?
    SHE: I've already seen it.

    HE: Where have you been all my life?
    SHE: Hiding from you.

    HE: Haven't I seen you some place before?
    SHE: Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.

    HE: Is this seat empty?
    SHE: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

    HE: So, what do you do for a living?
    SHE: I'm a female impersonator.

    HE: Hey baby, what's your sign?
    SHE: Do not enter.

    HE: Your body is like a temple.
    SHE: Sorry, there are no services today .

    HE: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
    SHE: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing

    HE: Where have you been all my life?
    SHE: Where I'll be the rest of your life - in your wildest dreams .