I hate my neighbour....

#41
Squiffy
I,m sitting at this moment in my mortgage free detached bungalow next to some wonderful neighbours, and my heart aches for you :lol:
 
#42
WRAPJOBAGAIN said:
in my old house new next door neighbors moved in and a lot of banging.
OK i can live with that as they have just moved in.

but 8 weeks later still a lot of banging getting very pished off by now.
so i go round rings the bell bloke opens the door.
and i say whats with all the banging fella its been going on now for 8 weeks.

him sorry mate it wont happen again.

me OK fella by the way iam not your mate.

gos back to my house about 30 minutes later more banging.
right that's it i say to the other half out the door i go rings the door bell again.

he opens the door and without sayin a word i put my fist right in his grid.
and he hits the deck.
me back to my house and not herd a thing from him since.
Of course you did. I'd have punched you into a coma you d!cksplash.
 
#44
squiffy_parsons said:
ordinaryforces said:
Squiffy
I,m sitting at this moment in my mortgage free detached bungalow next to some wonderful neighbours, and my heart aches for you :lol:
Thanks :wink:
Squiffmeister, you are slipping in your old age.

You missed "dickhead" off the end and neglected to ask why they live in a bungalow. Are they too fat to get up the stairs?

At least WheelchairWarrior has an excuse.
 
#45
Serves you all right for living on Chavvy Estates. Mind you, it permeates through the entire strata of society. Can you believe it, why only last year I had cause to despatch Farquahar, our butler and odd job man, to the adjoining estate, to take issue with the damned Ghillies, shouting and beating the Grouse out. Frightened the horses, I tell you.

Beats me why poor people should be allowed to live in houses at all. Contact your local Navy recruitment office to round em up and ship em all off to Orrstralia.
 
#46
marco_poloroid said:
Serves you all right for living on Chavvy Estates. Mind you, it permeates through the entire strata of society. Can you believe it, why only last year I had cause to despatch Farquahar, our butler and odd job man, to the adjoining estate, to take issue with the damned Ghillies, shouting and beating the Grouse out. Frightened the horses, I tell you.

Beats me why poor people should be allowed to live in houses at all. Contact your local Navy recruitment office to round em up and ship em all off to Orrstralia.
That's really funny. No really.
 
#47
The_Snail said:
marco_poloroid said:
Serves you all right for living on Chavvy Estates. Mind you, it permeates through the entire strata of society. Can you believe it, why only last year I had cause to despatch Farquahar, our butler and odd job man, to the adjoining estate, to take issue with the damned Ghillies, shouting and beating the Grouse out. Frightened the horses, I tell you.

Beats me why poor people should be allowed to live in houses at all. Contact your local Navy recruitment office to round em up and ship em all off to Orrstralia.
That's really funny. No really.
Why, who was joking?
 
#48
Neighbors fine
but once lived on a private road place was fine apart from the local Nazi who ran the residents committee cause nobody else could be bothered :roll:
said mother a shitty letter about no trade vans or cars because she parked a health service livered car in her parking bay while her district nurse car was being repaired.
whinging in the stab bar later on the way back form exercise Milan platoon stopped off for tea :twisted: land rovers squaddies all over the place making the place untidy.
neighbours came out to see little Hitler fuming.
called an extraordinary general meeting where he got put firmly in his place by some mad old Indian army officer. :D
 
#49
marco_poloroid said:
Serves you all right for living on Chavvy Estates. Mind you, it permeates through the entire strata of society. Can you believe it, why only last year I had cause to despatch Farquahar, our butler and odd job man, to the adjoining estate, to take issue with the damned Ghillies, shouting and beating the Grouse out. Frightened the horses, I tell you.

Beats me why poor people should be allowed to live in houses at all. Contact your local Navy recruitment office to round em up and ship em all off to Orrstralia.
Who said we all live on estates? I, for one, live in a countryside village community but still have sponging neighbours.

By the way, you're a cunt.
 
#50
My neighbours are a pair of cantankerous old ba$tards. They have 4 shitzu dogs that run at the gate scaring the $hit out of everyone that walks past. Their fat ar$ed daughter drives round from the next street and complained that I was stopping her from parking outside her parents because I was parked outside my own home. She also brings her 2 highland terriers and together the 6 mutts howl like banshees. Sunday mornings were the worst, all 6 six dogs are left in the house whilst the soap dodging, work shy tossers fcuk off to a car boot sale. Knowing how greedy the dogs are, I lay in wait in the back garden and as each dog came near the fence, I gave it a massive dose of laxative chocolate, which they wolfed down. Neighbours fcuked off out, returned 4 hours later to find nature (and the laxatives) had worked. The house was covered from top to bottom in sloppy dog shite, result!! :D :D :D
 
#52
When I was a mature student in London my first flat was a shitehole in Penge.
Penge is a spectacular dump, even for someone who reckons they've seen a thing or two after 6 years in para reg. We're talking mid-nineties now, maybe the place has improved(Although, I doubt it).

My neighbours were of African/Caribbean descent and thought it a great wheeze to 'Reggae the street up', starting at about midnight to around 5 in the morning.

"No problem", says I. I will go round and show them the error of their ways and the problem will be solved.

I go round about 6 in the morning, bang on the door a couple of times and am greeted by one bloke wielding a machete, and the other holding a revolver about 10 inches from my face.

Buggered off sharpish, out of 'hardman mode' even sharpisher, back to reality, welcome to South London.
 
#54
Howler said:
When I was a mature student in London my first flat was a shitehole in Penge.
Penge is a spectacular dump, even for someone who reckons they've seen a thing or two after 6 years in para reg. We're talking mid-nineties now, maybe the place has improved(Although, I doubt it).

My neighbours were of African/Caribbean descent and thought it a great wheeze to 'Reggae the street up', starting at about midnight to around 5 in the morning.

"No problem", says I. I will go round and show them the error of their ways and the problem will be solved.

I go round about 6 in the morning, bang on the door a couple of times and am greeted by one bloke wielding a machete, and the other holding a revolver about 10 inches from my face.

Buggered off sharpish, out of 'hardman mode' even sharpisher, back to reality, welcome to South London.
I take it you're talking about Maple Road? In the early 80s they used to have blues parties in all the flats. Roll up the carpets, turn the water off, charge people £1 entry and £1 for a drink of water. That's how they afford the machetes :lol:
 
#55
One of the most polite, neighbourly places I've lived in was Kennesaw in Georgia, just north of Atlanta (in general, a crime-ridden dump): I used to see an aged friend most mornings ambling towards his Civil War memorabilia shop by the Railroad Museum with a couple of 1911s in open carry. Very unusual and peaceable little town, though.

"If gun ownership is so dangerous and such a cause of social ills, then surely the most dangerous place in America must be Kennesaw, Georgia (a suburb of Atlanta), where since 1982 a law has required every household to have a firearm and ammunition. (Conscientious objectors are excluded.)

Right? Wrong!

There has not been a single reported crime of domestic violence in Kennesaw since the law was passed. There have been no injuries to children involving guns since the law was passed.

Furthermore, violence has actually dropped since 1982. Burglaries per thousand inhabitants fell from 11 to less than 3. There have been only 2 murders with knives (1984 and 1987), and 1 with a firearm (1997). All this despite the fact that the population in Kennesaw grew from around 5,000 in 1980 to 13,000 by 1996 (latest available estimate).

Could it be that gun ownership might have positive, not negative effects? That the whole premise behind gun banning is totally wrong? Just ask the people living in Kennesaw."
 
#58
FatBoyGeorge said:
Off topic but who's going to burgle your house or jack your car if they can be almost certain you're carrying a firearm?
Junkies and pykies. Junkies because their need out-ways the risk and pykies because they have no education and thus do not realize that the the price of copper is less than the price of paralysis.
 
#59
devilish said:
FatBoyGeorge said:
Off topic but who's going to burgle your house or jack your car if they can be almost certain you're carrying a firearm?
Junkies and pykies. Junkies because their need out-ways the risk and pykies because they have no education and thus do not realize that the the price of copper is less than the price of paralysis.
A case for ethnic cleansing if ever I heard one.
 
#60
in which case, you end up with less scumbags on the street because they're either dead... or dead.
 

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