So I was walking down a dark alley minding my own business when I was accosted by some thugs. Happily, I managed to dispatch of them in short order. But not before I got clobbered on the head with a beer bottle which necessitated an overnight stay at the local emergency room. The next Monday I walked into my place of employment and had to recount the tale to my admiring audience when some jackass asked the inconvenient question: "Isn't that right behind that gay bar?" Needless to say it is. The scene of my now alleged mugging is also in the gay district. I wasn't there for any "queer" reasons but the cut down the alley would have ensured I made the bus on time. Now, seems to me, everybody thinks I was up (or down) to no good. What to do?