I didnt know which thread to post this in

I didnt know which thread to post this in, so I made my own.

I d just like to start off, (sniff) to thank those of you who have become my virtual, and indeed, realish mates who I would love to have shared a German taxi-fare, or Burd with. I ve been on here for a few years now, and can honestly say that I have seldom laughed so much since leaving HMF, there is nothing better in life when your cheeks hurt and tears run down them with pure laughter (apart from some sexual deviant games with whores aside) and by fuck, I have had some laughs on here.

I am addicted to three things in life, and am cutting down. 1) Nicotine, 2)Alcohol, 3) Arrse (4, Wanking), I ve decided to start the cull with number 3, Nos. 2, 1, and finally 4 will follow.

It is to this end, that I would like to say "Goodbye" to all of those who I regard as my Virtual mates, in no apparent order: Aleegee1698 (the funniest fucker ever), Steven Seagull, Recce19, Jarrod, The Snail, Sinner, Zero, Tiny-lewis, Camberwell Carrot, Desperate Dan, Eric Shawn, HCV, 5A, TID, Lanceprivatejones, Goatrutar, Mark the convict, Sunjock, Alec Webster, Mark Powell/Knight, Bucksfelize, Forestaro*, Dave Reeve etc, you all helped an old cunt rediscover how to cry laughing.

There are obviously some on here that I dislike, but I wont name names, you know who you are, dont you, WEREWOLF, you fucking Never-served Know-it-all, SFUB, I d kick you to death at the drop of an airborne hat, Tropper, er, yeh, just Tropper, and any aspiring, ex-alcoholic wannabe Mods who read loadsa books.

The best thing to come out of all of this is the work done behind the scenes by PG and Co for Hols4heroes to which I have willingly contributed, keep up the good work.

So, theres only one way outta this: Nigger, Coon, Paki, Wog, Choggi, Wallah, Darkie, Islamic Ray-gun etc.

Mods, can you please keep this account open for the next 24 hrs so I can at least see my likes?

Love y all, n keep safe

Nugger n The Gee
Could you have not just karked it in a freak wanking accident and left us a note to be opened in the event of your untimely death inside a North Face kit bag?
When you do go can Buzz have your likes, cos he's a right old meanie sometimes...
I have recieved to date 433 likes in the last few months or so and yet I have only ever given out one in return and that was probably as I was drunk and feeling charitable.

Peer approval is for bummers.
Bye then! What's your new sign-on name then?
Thanks for that, this is an interesting read which I should heed and adopt for my close family:

[h=1]Being listened to lifts the mood of the nation[/h]Thursday 24 May 2012
- For Immediate Release -
A YouGov poll shows that 44.01 per cent of people across the nation value being listened to as one of the simple acts of kindness to brighten their day.
The poll, published this week by Samaritans, to coincide with National Volunteers’ Week (1-7 June), asked people in the UK to reveal the small act of kindness that brightened their day in the past year. Over half of people (53%) chose receiving a friendly smile, followed by getting a hug (51.94%), a compliment (51.64%), their birthday being remembered (46%), and someone saying good morning (44.41%).
Catherine Johnstone, Chief Executive of Samaritans said: “The results of the poll show how a very small gesture can have a really positive impact on someone. Samaritans volunteers spend their time listening to people, which clearly helps in making people feel happier. National Volunteers’ Week is a fantastic opportunity to thank the 20,665 volunteers at our branch for their dedication and support, they are truly inspirational.”
National Volunteers’ Week, which takes place from 1 to 7 June, is an annual celebration of the contribution of volunteers across the country.
Chair of Samaritans, Stephen Hoddell said: “Every year our volunteers give uncountable hours of their time to helping people struggling to cope, and without them we would not be able to answer millions of calls we receive every year. Thank you to each and every Samaritan.”

...............instead of taking everything for granted. Maybe we should all stand back and look at ourselves once in a while, and what we do/ how we act, instead of having tunnel-vision.
He prefers to dance to this when he feels down.

Goodbye Horses Q Lazzarus Music Video by Jessica Janos Q Lazarus - YouTube

Complete with cock tucked back.
Poor in comparison. But no matter.

What you have to do is put your cans on (neighbours can be a bit of a bore at this hour) get your best pants on and big it on, banging your gonads on the sink to the beat.

If you do this, you'll find no need for drunken 'goodbye' posts, or indeed any other theatre-related sadness.
Carm dan, carm dan. This is at most a virtual suicide, nothing more. But just for your conscience 3123, I m gonna give myself a .357 FMJ. You ll have to live with that.
'tis the booze talking. He'll be ok.


So will you be doing the piano wire around your neck with your hands glued to your head, and slam dunk your melon? Or is autoerotic strangulation a goer?
The cunt never gave me a mention so I hope he has a freak anal accident with a broken marmite jar and bleeds to death.

Black bollocks one out.
Numbers: you can lead a horse to water.....
When I were a lad I were apprenticed to a horrible old engineer (heavy mechanical) in a steel works. Old Ted (for that was he) was an old school Yorkshire cunt. A brass bound, gold plated, silver tipped, fur lined, ocean going cunt. He had a fund of useless sayings, one of which went like this: if you ever catch a weasel asleep, piss in its ear.

Black ball in off the cushion.

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