I am a twin should I be worried?

should I take to the hills

  • yes your going to get your just deserts in a hail of machinegunfire

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • no woodys slow and would run out of ammo before he reached brighton anyway

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    0
#1
after Whitehaven got me thinking
my twin is inherently evil took part in telic and committed war crimes admittedly crap ones (suspending haribo on fishing line out of reach of iraq kids) among others but still I'm sure phil could get a claim out of that :twisted:
he has access to firearms in fact he has keys to the armoury.
on the plus side he's crap at shooting without a c2 sight he's pretty hopeless and moves slightly faster than a tortoise although not with the tortoises determination and drive :evil:
so should I be worried about 40 odd years of resentment driving him into an insane killing spree of truly random shooting much like his apwt or chillax as I'm 50 miles away and I lost his gps :twisted:
 
#3
Did you ever shag one of his birds? If yes, start worrying.

He's probably drawing a weapon as I type.
 
#5
Markintime said:
How does he know you're not the potential killer?
Reverse psychology, I like that. :D


Right, Hippy Nutter dude, step away from the incense stick and the sharp pointy pencil.
 
#8
First we need to establish what sort of twins you are.

Danny Devito and Arnie? The bad tempered small man and the psychotic cyborg death machine. Potential for one or both to be homocidal

Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. Stick thin, pox ridden crack whores. A certainty for both to be cockacidal.

Gabriela and Monica Irimia. See above.

Matt and Luke Goss........er, see above.

Do you have a psychic bond? If you cut your finger, does your twin wince in sympathetic pain?

Have you ever hung around at the end of a hotel corridor scaring the f*ck out of a small boy on a tricycle?

The chances are one of you is a f*ckin' nut case. May I suggest that you elimanate all doubt by lopping off his head the instant you see him next. That way you can be sure he's not going to go postal at a later date.
 
#9
he has already threatened me about my grammar and did once brand me with a hot spoon for not making him a brew :(
 
#11
Why don't you pip him to the post ... and kill him first. That way you've got no worries.
 
#12
I'm the father of twins, and am looking forward to trying to guess which of my boys will turn into a pyscho. I'm already pretty sure it will the youngest (by 3 minutes). The eldest is always giggling and smiley, the youngest is always watching and seems to be plotting. He reminds me of Stewie Griffin from Family Guy. Although if he does try to kill his mum (my wife), I'll give him an alibi and destroy any evidence if required.
 
#13
You shouldn't be worried that you're a twin. The rest of us should be, though.
 

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#14
Miner said:
I'm the father of twins, and am looking forward to trying to guess which of my boys will turn into a pyscho. I'm already pretty sure it will the youngest (by 3 minutes). The eldest is always giggling and smiley, the youngest is always watching and seems to be plotting. He reminds me of Stewie Griffin from Family Guy. Although if he does try to kill his mum (my wife), I'll give him an alibi and destroy any evidence if required.
And if he tries to kill his father you will still be safe. :p :twisted:
 
#15
smartascarrots said:
You shouldn't be worried that you're a twin. The rest of us should be, though.
:D
it gets worse I've succesfully bred :twisted:
 
#16
Did you ever refuse to give him a reach around?

That could well have triggered it, in which case I'd recommend buying a new wardrobe of items beginning with 'Kevlar'.
 
#18
If your an identical twin, murder him, and then just simply take his place. You can bone his missus and get to razz about in his motor, clocking up parking fines and speed tickets as you go.

You could get up to alsorts of shenanigans whilst your giving it " Tisk ... that brother of mine eh?".
 
#19
I would but he's too fat :x
"its not fat its body armour"

soooooo you wore cba even under tshirt and shorts :twisted:
 
#20
Miner said:
I'm the father of twins, and am looking forward to trying to guess which of my boys will turn into a pyscho. I'm already pretty sure it will the youngest (by 3 minutes). The eldest is always giggling and smiley, the youngest is always watching and seems to be plotting. He reminds me of Stewie Griffin from Family Guy. Although if he does try to kill his mum (my wife), I'll give him an alibi and destroy any evidence if required.
Easy. The evil twin will have a goatee beard.


It's amazing what you can learn from films.
 

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