I am a hero, and you WILL recognise that fact.

Been kicking this idea about ever since the Danny Nightingale affair.

What we need is to compile the definitive "I have served, and you will recognise and acknowledge the fact" list.

I'm talking about a sliding scale of service/heroism v slack-cutting, if that make sense? For instance, 3 year Pvt with no tours gets let off a drunk & disorderly, through to a VC-holder gets to murder hookers with a hammer and all points of crime & justice in between.

Gents, fill in the gaps, please. This document will eventually be enshrined in law and will allow every single tom to avoid jail if he polish's his collar dogs often enough, so keep it real.
 
Put me down for a £20mil bank fraud then.
 

Dread

LE
A VC gets to twat brass with a ballpein hammer? FFS. Why wasn't I told when serving? I would have slaughtered the Serbs if I'd known that, rather than running back to the EFI at Trogir and leaving them to do their ethnic cleansing.

1 x 6 month peacekeeping tour = 1 drunk driving or drunk fight get out of jail free card.
1 x 6 month 'high intensity' tour = 1 rape (2 if the girls/boys involved are ugly and therefore grateful for the attention)get out of jail free card.
1 x war (longer than 6 months, including transport to and from) = 1 manslaughter get out of jail free card.
1 x MC = all of the above benefits, irrespective of when/how the MC was awarded.
1 x DSO = 20 rapes get out of jail free card.
 
Dog fouling fine (see avatar).
 
A VC gets to twat brass with a ballpein hammer? FFS. Why wasn't I told when serving? I would have slaughtered the Serbs if I'd known that, rather than running back to the EFI at Trogir and leaving them to do their ethnic cleansing.

1 x 6 month peacekeeping tour = 1 drunk driving or drunk fight get out of jail free card.
1 x 6 month 'high intensity' tour = 1 rape (2 if the girls/boys involved are ugly and therefore grateful for the attention)get out of jail free card.
1 x war (longer than 6 months, including transport to and from) = 1 manslaughter get out of jail free card.
1 x MC = all of the above benefits, irrespective of when/how the MC was awarded.
1 x DSO = 20 rapes get out of jail free card.

I see your plan, A+, the execution will be an F though. Let's face it, do you have it in you?
 

cymraeg

War Hero
Im good for getting done for vagrancy
 
I reckon I'm good for nicking a few collection tins.

I've been doing that in the run up to remembrance, you wont believe the amount of foreign coins in the tins, its outrageous that some people could be so dishonest.
 
... so keep it real.

In the NAAFI? Seriously?

While it's all very well allowing military heroism to get one off scot-free from criminal behaviour, what'll we do if a group of A&E nurses or Paramedics cut loose and go on a killing spree. And what about those bastards in the RNLI, stone cold killers to a man and woman.

Personally speaking, spitting on the street would earn me a severe telling off from the bench and a sound thrashing afterwards. But who was your greatest military hero? I heard of a lad who was caught nicking a junior officer's rank markings. When they searched his locker they found a general's collar tabs. Definitely deserving of a promotion at least.
 
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A VC gets to twat brass with a ballpein hammer? FFS. Why wasn't I told when serving? I would have slaughtered the Serbs if I'd known that, rather than running back to the EFI at Trogir and leaving them to do their ethnic cleansing.

1 x 6 month peacekeeping tour = 1 drunk driving or drunk fight get out of jail free card.
1 x 6 month 'high intensity' tour = 1 rape (2 if the girls/boys involved are ugly and therefore grateful for the attention)get out of jail free card.
1 x war (longer than 6 months, including transport to and from) = 1 manslaughter get out of jail free card.
1 x MC = all of the above benefits, irrespective of when/how the MC was awarded.
1 x DSO = 20 rapes get out of jail free card.

So presumably, a CGC would be okay for ten rapes?
 

Legs

ADC
Book Reviewer
I'm such a hero I might just (possibly) get away with telling one of the Eastern European tramps on Prince's Street in Edinburgh to '**** Off'.









If I do it Sotto voce.
 
Civvy. But I have a medal! For overtaking fat people and skipping over the lame whilst dodging their manky, blistered feet for four days on a row.

I'm allowed to cry on a bus because a random squaddie was refused at Tesco's and I get to write outraged letters to the Guardian whenever a War Hero is charged with the rape of a minor.
 
In the NAAFI? Seriously?

While it's all very well allowing military heroism to get one off scot-free from criminal behaviour, what'll we do if a group of A&E nurses or Paramedics cut loose and go on a killing spree. And what about those bastards in the RNLI, stone cold killers to a man and woman.

Personally speaking, spitting on the street would earn me a severe telling off from the bench and a sound thrashing afterwards. But who was your greatest military hero? I heard of a lad who was caught nicking a junior officer's rank markings. When they searched his locker they found a general's collar tabs. Definitely deserving of a promotion at least.

good point, but they can workout their own scales, I'm really only interested in us, the Senior Service & the 100 year experiment.

Test case scenario.
12 year served, attached arm full screw brays a taxi driver following a vomiting incident in the back of a Skoda Octavia. The 'screw has medals for 3 op tours (one of which involved staying drunk for 6 months in Cyprus) and has also ran a half marathon for H4H.

What punishment should our hapless hero get?
 
Shoplifting, but maybe only from the likes of pound saver, Aldi or Lidl. Up to and including anything to the value of £4.63. If wearing my medals at the time I could maybe get away with parking across two disabled spots in the town centre.
 

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