Humerous Demise

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Blackrat, Oct 22, 2007.

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  1. Have just heard on the radio that the Mayor of Delhi has passed away the day after being attacked by a troop of monkeys. I s*it you not. I have to say, i laughed my c*ck off. What the f*ck was he up to? I'd love to read the head stone on that one. Can anyone think of any other classic demises such as this?
  2. Didn't realise the RMP were posted to Delhi.
  3. If my experience is anything to go by, he'll be the only person in history to die after being attacked by Monkeys. Except from laughter.

    I've heard of a chap who was crushed by a piano at the bottom of a mine-shaft.
  4. quality :)
  5. A flat minor Perhaps :eek:
  6. There was the picture on t'internet a while ago of the bloke who had a huge boulder fall on him while he was shagging a chicken.
  7. I've always had this vision of Rod Hull being attacked by his own Emu on the rooftop he fell off whilst trying to fix his TV antenna.
  8. I always thought Parkinson had something to do with that death.
  9. the headstone should have a small extract at the bottom

    spanking the monkey could lead to an early grave!
  10. Darwin awards are full of deserved ends.

    My favorite is the lawyer in Toronto who would regularly (party trick)demonstrate the strength of the safety glass in his 24th floor office by running into it. During his last demonstration, the frame gave way.

  11. I wonder how they killed him? Something to do with bananas i hope, that would be funny.
  12. My sources say that to combat this pestilence of cheeky thieving and aggressive monkies the local authorities are bringing in.................

    more agressive groups of larger predatory monkeys

  13. Try these for size:

    The Jockey died but the Horse kept going... and WON!
    Frank Hayes, jockey, suffered a heart attack during a horse race. The horse, Sweet Kiss, went on to finish first, making Hayes the only deceased jockey to win a race. (1953)

    Teenager killed by a MiG-23 fighter jet
    A Belgian teenager was killed by a crashing soviet MiG-23 fighter jet, which escaped from Poland on autopilot after the crew ejected over a false engine failure alarm. (1989)

    Don't touch the animals you freak!
    Kenneth Pinyan an Enumclaw, Seattle WA. man, died of acute peritonitis after submitting to anal intercourse with a stallion. The man had done this before, though apparently this time his partner was a little too keen, and delayed several hours to visit hospital wishing to avoid official cognisance. The case may lead to the criminalization of bestiality in Washington. (2005)

    Distracted by his wife, in the middle of World War I
    François Faber, Luxembourgean Tour de France winner, died in a trench on the western front of World War I. He received a telegram saying his wife had given birth to a daughter. He cheered, giving away his position, and was shot by a German sniper (1915).

    The politician shot himself during a TV conference
    R. Budd Dwyer, a Republican politician, committed suicide during a televised press conference. Facing a potential 55-year jail sentence for alleged involvement in a conspiracy, Dwyer shot himself in the head with a revolver. (1987)

    Assassinated with an Umbrella
    Georgi Markov, a Bulgarian dissident, was assassinated by poisoning in London by an unknown assailant who shot him in the leg with a specially modified umbrella that fired a metal pellet with a small cavity full of ricin poison. (1978)

    Brandon Lee and the magic bullet
    Brandon Lee, the son of Bruce Lee, was shot and killed by a prop .44 Magnum while filming the movie The Crow. The scene involved the firing of a full-powder blank (full charge of gunpowder, but no bullet) at Brandon's character. However, unknown to the film crew/firearms technician, a bullet was already lodged in the barrel. (1993)

    He swallowed a toothpick on a party
    Sherwood Anderson, writer, swallowed a toothpick at a party and then died of peritonitis. (1941)

    A foil pierced his eyeball and entered his brain
    Vladimir Smirnov, an Olympic champion fencer, died of brain damage nine days after his opponent's foil snapped during a match, pierced his eyeball and entered his brain. (1982)

    "Are we boring you, Mr. Rodale?"
    Jerome Irving Rodale, an American pioneer of organic farming, died of a heart attack while being interviewed on the Dick Cavett Show. When he appeared to fall asleep, Cavett quipped "Are we boring you, Mr. Rodale?". The show was never broadcast. (1971)

    And this is Live News...
    Christine Chubbuck, an American television news reporter committed suicide during a live broadcast on July 15th. At 9:38 AM, 8 minutes into her talk show, on WXLT-TV in Sarasota, Florida, she drew out a revolver and shot herself in the head. (1974)

    Wasn't that just part of the act?
    Tommy Cooper, British magician, died on stage at Her Majesty's Theatre during a live television routine. Most of the audience and viewers believed it was part of his act. (1984)
  14. Well, the 13th Duke is going to take some beating.