How was it for you Darling?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Mexeman, Dec 25, 2012.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. When I asked this towards the end of this wonderful day full of love, forgiveness and goodwill, I was told in no uncertain way to " fuck right off"
    This was a surprise to me as I thought that I had kept out of her way all day and by staying out of "her kitchen" I was observing the Christmas Day Protocol.

    How fucking wrong can a bloke be?
  2. I don't remember marrying you.
    • Like Like x 1
  3. If it was you that I had married it would have been me saying fuck right off!
    Having said that, it was nice of you to think of me as a potential life partner.
  4. Ahhhh yes. Married life. I remember it well.
    • Like Like x 2
  5. I remember it too well never again.
  6. Builders-Shovel_large.jpg


    Sure about that?
    • Like Like x 5
  7. As far as women are concerned, the measure of 'How Wrong Can A Bloke" starts with:

    'TOTALLY' (equating to just a little bit in reality) at the top of the scale right through to
    "Just Fuck Off You Fucking Bastard while I sulk for a few days" (worst) at the other end.

    There are many grades in between but due to the way and the ever changing manner in which women measure "Wrong" they are currently undocumented.

    It's fair to say that whatever you did / didn't / said / thought / intended you was "WRONG"

    Hope that helps
    • Like Like x 1
  8. Potential 'lifestyle' partner.
  9. Stop bluffing, it won't put me off now.
    I can feel a future with a woman who can lay a patio that neat. Besides, I can be your feeder....
  10. Ive got a major crush on Miranda Hart now, Kirsty Allsopp just doesnt do it for me anymore.
  11. You've been offshore too long, your standards are slipping...
  12. Noo, i think she is lovely
  13. Noooooooooooo, you have been offshore too long. Trust me, I'm an Engineer (not one of those Sapper ones) a marine one.
  14. You'd be looking at the patio from the underneath. With the rest of the bodies.
    • Like Like x 1
  15. Are you one of those dirty people we see at mealtimes in the Galley?