How to pull. (Guys take note)

Discussion in 'The ARRSE Hole' started by scotlass, May 23, 2007.

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  1. I recieved this message on FP, and it made me chuckle, so for the benefit of Desktop and all the other guys struggling to find a female (well at least one with a pulse) a bit of humour goes a long way.

    "If your looking to find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will stay awake just to watch you sleep, who kisses your forehead when your feeling down, who wants to show you off to the world when you're having a bad hair day, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is, then I truly hope you find him. However while your waiting for him to appear why don't you pop over to my profile and chat to an idiot like me ! ! ! ! !"

    Oh and for the record, no i wont be going out with him...

    Anymore anyone?
  2. old_fat_and_hairy

    old_fat_and_hairy LE Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    Ah, lovely lady. I would hold open doors, walk on outside of pavement, hold your hand, send flowers, even lay a coat on puddles, just for you.

    And ask for no reward, other than a wan smile, and a fond glance.
  3. and a blowjob??? :D
  4. :wink:
  5. Well i would wipe the tagnuts from your bumhairs!
    Now ROMANCE!
  7. old_fat_and_hairy

    old_fat_and_hairy LE Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    Tut tut. Such philistines these chaps are. Ignore the rough boys, don't play with them.

    Let me take you away from all that coarseness, and ensconce you in my luxury apartment, where I would spoil you and pamper you.
    Bathe your body in sensual oils and unguents.
  8. old_fat_and_hairy

    old_fat_and_hairy LE Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    Dear legs! Such a card.

    Be sure to open the box that will shortly be delivered. Don't bother to call Felix or anyone. Just rip it open with careless abandon.
  10. No, but I'd drink your dirty bath water.
  11. :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: Forget the coat!!!We like getting wet :wink:
  12. The point was to show that humour, can be attractive, sometimes more than looks, and that the way to win a woman is not always by being good looking. Take Woody Allen for example, ugly as sin but had beautiful women dropping at his feet....why humour...
  13. I think wiping your cock on the curtains and stealing the Sky remote on your way out the door is the ultimate form of affection...
  14. old_fat_and_hairy

    old_fat_and_hairy LE Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    It should work for me then. Women have been known to point at me in street and laugh as I walk by.
  15. scaryspice

    scaryspice LE Moderator

    Worst of the drivel removed.. resisting the temptation to put the thread in the Hole where it probably belongs.

    Now carry on and see if you can play nicely.