How to humilate him..?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Squiggers, May 12, 2009.

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  1. Okay, got my best mate whos just broken up with a boyfriend.

    Now, hes a complete and utter penis, and is completely common as hell. Blonde, blue eyes, teenage, likes Indie, football, etc. etc.

    Thing is, hes just broken up with my mate, in quite a nasty fashion, and just before a gig she was playing. Nice.

    Anyway, this wouldn't be the NAFFI if it didn't involve something painful, or a request for deviancy, and this is no exception to that rule.

    Pretty much, hes hung like a mouse (Wee 4 incher, from what she said) and to boot, she snapped his banjo string. Yes, you read that right. His banjo string, while riding him silly. :roll:

    Now, how can we (Me and a few mates, including her) utterly, utterly humiliate the stupid tosser? Ideally, using the above information.

    Suggestions? (And no, no pictures of her, or the injured Banjostring for proof.)
     
  2. So he is RAF Regt. :twisted:

    Don't you think he has suffered enough.... :wink:
     
  3. I suggest printing a leaflet informing the local community that some nosh bag is trying to pull some childish prank on him and asking for help on the tinterweb to boot.
    To really rub the salt into the wound I would include some of the mind numbing dross typed maybe in this format.

    Just knowing that at one point in his life he has associated with this utter ballbag would be embarrising enough but for the world to know as well.

    Job done as far as Im concerned.

    Hope this was helpful.

    Regards.
     
  4. BrunoNoMedals

    BrunoNoMedals LE Reviewer

    More importantly, is your mate after a rebound shag?
     
  5. Well at least we have a heads up on whats shes into.

    And she likes a modest bobby too so I might be in here.

    Sounds like she has a tight hoop too judging by the banjo string, yes you read it right banjo string, incident.
     
  6. Give it time, he'll probably join... ;)

    Most likely, knowing her.... :twisted:

    ...Greg, is that you? :eek: Crap, I've been rumbled... :roll:
     
  7. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    Greg - you tiny-penised fcuktard - you're so busted!
     
  8. Well, that'll do for starters...
     
  9. BrunoNoMedals

    BrunoNoMedals LE Reviewer

    Sweet. And she's in a band too?

    I think we're on to something here, lads.
     
  10. Why is it that its too big to throw up their sh1tter but as soon as you split up its known for struggling to compete with a babies thumb in girth.

    :roll:

    Women (Simple Creatures).

    How about setting fire to all the congratulations cards he's now getting off his mates. When I binned my last bint (By asking her to get out of the C_J Mobile at a service station on the M62) my mates threw a good party for me. It was a pesh up with banners (Made out of kitchen roll but still banners) and a BBQ and I didn't even have to pay for any booze.

    If you find out where this party is and ruin it I'm sure it will scratch a 4/10 on the annoyance'o'meter before he probably spikes your drink and smashes your poo pipe in.

    Hope this helps!
     
  11. Your "best mate" is a girl and you sit around gosipping about her boyfriend's dick... Now he's pissed you off, and rather than give him a slap, you're going to gang up with a bunch of mates and 'humiliate' him.

    You fcuking woman.
     
  12. Err, is four inches not very big then? :oops:
     
  13. Seconded - fag hag!
     
  14. Do you discuss clothes and make-up as well, Sounds like your upset because he didnt try to shag you.
     
  15. Who gives a fuck. Write to Dear Deidre you sad cunt.