How To Fix 'The North'?

[armchair_ninja]

Viz walt...

I am a Geordie...

 

[CptDanjou]

Theres a lot of talk about the North needing a better public transport system to be able to catch up with the South , with the exception of home counties dwellers travelling into London are there that many high flying business types who use the train ? a big Merc / BMW or flying seems to be the way for many I`ve seen , would HS2 really make a big difference ? I cant see it .

 

[Toastie]

A train nerd? You mean he should be on a certain register...

Relax.

I signed on schedule only last week.

 

[Speedy]

Theres a lot of talk about the North needing a better public transport system to be able to catch up with the South , with the exception of home counties dwellers travelling into London are there that many high flying business types who use the train ? a big Merc / BMW or flying seems to be the way for many I`ve seen , would HS2 really make a big difference ? I cant see it .

Very much so. We've been crying out for a good trans-Pennine route for a long time now.
A few years back I had to make regualr business trips to Leeds from Preston. On the (very old and tired Pacer) train it took two hours. It takes an hour and a half to drive, even on a packed M62.
As regards HS2, not one person I know thinks it is needed. The money could have been much better spent on laying fibre to build a better internet backbone.
Not to mention that, as per currently, train ticket prices for any distance are stupidly high unless pre-booked (and even then, still far, far higher than using your own vehicle) and deterring many from using the service. I can't see HS2 being any different. But this is a discussion for the HS2 thread I think.
These days it is quite rare for me to go on trips thanks to Skype, Teams etc. and I don't miss them one bit. Getting myself and my business partner to London for a meeting would cost over 1k for travel and hotels + expenses and that meant that any money to be made was already cut into. Yes, there are times that we still need to go and see potential clients, but they are very rare these days.

 

[CptDanjou]

Very much so. We've been crying out for a good trans-Pennine route for a long time now.
A few years back I had to make regualr business trips to Leeds from Preston. On the (very old and tired Pacer) train it took two hours. It takes an hour and a half to drive, even on a packed M62.
As regards HS2, not one person I know thinks it is needed. The money could have been much better spent on laying fibre to build a better internet backbone.
Not to mention that, as per currently, train ticket prices for any distance are stupidly high unless pre-booked (and even then, still far, far higher than using your own vehicle) and deterring many from using the service. I can't see HS2 being any different. But this is a discussion for the HS2 thread I think.
These days it is quite rare for me to go on trips thanks to Skype, Teams etc. and I don't miss them one bit. Getting myself and my business partner to London for a meeting would cost over 1k for travel and hotels + expenses and that meant that any money to be made was already cut into. Yes, there are times that we still need to go and see potential clients, but they are very rare these days.

Yep technology is changing business , spend your money on a Zoom studio instead of a motorway cruiser ,need to demonstrate products? courier them to your client the day before then go through the product on Zoom and so on.

 

[supermatelot]

I think @Toastie has more than revealed his true colours on this thread:

 

[HCL]

Theres a lot of talk about the North needing a better public transport system to be able to catch up with the South , with the exception of home counties dwellers travelling into London are there that many high flying business types who use the train ? a big Merc / BMW or flying seems to be the way for many I`ve seen , would HS2 really make a big difference ? I cant see it .

HS2 will suck more business into London and widen its commuter belt for the well heeled.

 

[History_Man]

I think @Toastie has more than revealed his true colours on this thread:

That sketch always makes me think of ex-Mrs_HM's late parents.

 

[miner69er]

Speedy, about 20 years ago they relocated the Scottish office from the centre of Edinburgh to Leith. AM not sure if you have seen Trainspotting but Leith - was (and in some areas still is) a sh!thole of the first degree. Howls from the Civil Servants but they were told your going - it was part of the gentrification process. Day one over 200 cars were broken into and by the end of the week that car park looked like Stalag v, completely surrounded by barbed wire . Leith is still struggling but look what happened in Manchseter as a result of the BBC reloacting. I think the same might happen in Leeds when Ch 4 moves there. The upshot is if you want to get things moving drop a load of CS or equivalnet in a sh!thole and they will soon have it punching above its weight. Move em out of London - the money will soon follow

 

[Speedy]

HS2 will suck more business into London and widen its commuter belt for the well heeled.

Yup, when various spokes-people and supporters talked about it, it was always about how much it would improve travel time to London. Never any other benefit.
It just seems to be all about making parts of the UK a commuter belt for the capital and seeing as it was in planning since the noughties I can't help but think it was the London centric Labour party that thought it was a good idea.

 

[HCL]

Speedy, about 20 years ago they relocated the Scottish office from the centre of Edinburgh to Leith. AM not sure if you have seen Trainspotting but Leith - was (and in some areas still is) a sh!thole of the first degree. Howls from the Civil Servants but they were told your going - it was part of the gentrification process. Day one over 200 cars were broken into and by the end of the week that car park looked like Stalag v, completely surrounded by barbed wire . Leith is still struggling but look what happened in Manchseter as a result of the BBC reloacting. I think the same might happen in Leeds when Ch 4 moves there. The upshot is if you want to get things moving drop a load of CS or equivalnet in a sh!thole and they will soon have it punching above its weight. Move em out of London - the money will soon follow

Think you're a bit late with the idea that Leeds needs Ch 4. Harvey Nicks opened in Leeds in 1996 and that's its been the money shop and gay centre for the North for several decades.

 

[TheSockPuppet]

Surely the only feasible option is to nuke Liverpool and London. Twice, just to be sure. The third world shit holes.

Then, once the dust has settled, rebuild our capital in the north (north of the River Tees) using slave labour from the south (south of the River Tees).

 

[Harry Skinters]

At EMA there's a petrol station on the perimeter. Countless people have incurred a fixed penalty which prevents people being dropped off there to avoid similar eye watering drop off charges.

Green excuse? my arse, the only public transport access to EMA is a 2 shuttle buses an hour to nottingham that calls at every god forsaken suburb on the way making it a 1hr journey. to cover what takes 20 mins in a car

I've travelled on that ridiculous bus.
I was all suntan shorts and t shirt and the bus went through shit bits of Derbyshire and Nottingham with all sorts of Midlands monsters getting aboard on their way to sign on.
An obese bitch dressed head to foot in baby pink sat next to me and I was treated to the stench of her BO until Nottingham train station.
As far as I'm concerned, the north begins at the South Downs and the lot of you can die in poverty.

 

[dragon825]

I know they're talking of opening a line from north wales to Liverpool, rather than going via chester

Trying to drive in is painful, so faster train times would be nice

@lokiuk I thought they were reopening the Halton curve, ridiculous situation crying out to be used for passenger service I believe it went from freight to a parliamentary service ie 1 train a week just to keep the line open

 

[lokiuk]

@lokiuk I thought they were reopening the Halton curve, ridiculous situation crying out to be used for passenger service I believe it went from freight to a parliamentary service ie 1 train a week just to keep the line open

Currently via Chester or Wrexham, they're also talking of making the Holyhead to London line be able to run there as well, which will make the rest of the main line in North Wales commutable to Liverpool

 

[TheSockPuppet]

Currently via Chester or Wrexham, they're also talking of making the Holyhead to London line be able to run there as well, which will make the rest of the main line in North Wales commutable to Liverpool

Don't bother:

North Wales = Southern cnuts - cleanse them with fire
Liverpool = 3rd World Shit Hole , Southern cnuts - cleanse it with instant sunshine

Spend the money on the North instead (North of the River Tees).

 

[LeoRoverman]

I think @Toastie has more than revealed his true colours on this thread:

They’d be ripe for takeover by Ryanair, just the kind of no frills set up they like.

 

[Mike Barton]

Thinking more on this:

Now: Fred crawls out of bed at 0600, puts on a clean shirt that his Mrs has had to iron, ponders on waking the kids to say goodbye and drives to the station, parks and pays his daily £10. The train is late and when it comes in it‘s rammed, £5,000 for a season ticket to stand for 90 minutes with someone else’s armpit in his face.

The open plan office is just one big distraction whilst he’s got a lot on, ringing phones, people wandering about and just a dull place when he gets a slack day but he’s still got to look busy because there’s always some turd snooping about, checking on the drones. Tina from accounts looks fit but oh shit, here comes Bob, no doubt he’s buggered up the contracting for that latex consignment needed for the outsize dildo contract that’s overdue. Again. They try to sort it but everyone else is chipping in, secretly happy that it’s not them on the rack. The boss is gonna be pissed.

Lunch. Yay. Walk down the street in the noise and dirt, jostled in the queue for £8 of sarnie which tastes of ingredients he’s never heard of and back to the office for the afternoon which is a repeat of the morning.

The train home is a repeat of the train in. He gets home and the kids are in bed and the Mrs has a load of shirts to iron so Fred microwaves the food his Mrs did for the kids as she isn’t cooking twice and ate with them. Everyone is tired so a petty squabble kicks off so a sneaky w%nk it is then.

Next day, Fred crawls out of bed at 0600.....

The future?: Fred gets out of bed when he feels like it, based on how much he’s got to do today. He sees the kids off to school, maybe even takes them in himself. He’s got no zoom meetings today so shorts and yesterday’s T shirt will do, save on the washing for the Mrs. She’s in a better mood these days what with him helping around the house when he’s got a slack day and what with the kids being at school, maybe a “back to when we first met” style quickie is on the cards? Tina from accounts may be fit but she’s thick as shit and a one off with her would be talk of the office inside 5 minutes and divorce / financial ruin sure to follow and anyway, I’m getting plenty at home now so why bother?

Oh, it’s Bob on the phone. Yep, he’s cocked it up but Fred is sat in the garden with a brew and no distractions so they can have a proper chat and get it sorted, save the deal and the boss will be impressed.

Lunch is a couple of sausages he’s found in the fridge and maybe a bit of her mother’s fruit cake. Proper old trout she is but she’s mellowed now Fred and her daughter are getting on better. Hey, quiet afternoon, so maybe take the kids out for a walk after school and have a chat about a holiday? Fred is looking to push the boat out as £10 a day on parking, £5,000 season ticket and £8 on a sarnie each day adds up to some serious spare cash.

Maybe teach the kids a bit about cooking something other than spaghetti hoops tonight and have a meal together, bit of play afterwards, help them with homework. “My dad’s the best dad” never gets old. Not got to get up early tomorrow so perhaps a pint or two with the lads tonight?

It’s got to be a no brainer.

An excellent synopsis Toastie, of the current situation.

The current situation.

A year or two down the road however there is this scenario. Fred gets urgent email sent to him and his team at 5pm, calling them all for a Zoom meet the next morning with HR at 9am. At the meeting the HR director reads out a statement, Fred hears words like "efficiencies", restructuring", "current economic climate", "redundancy packages".

Next morning at 8am, Dinesh rolls out of his bed in his apartment in Bangalore, charges up his laptop and starts his new job.

It won't happen to every job, but as I have said many times before, if you can do your job from home, there's a good likelihood someone in India can do your job just as well from his home for a tenth of the cost.

We are in a transition phase at the moment, but we'd be kidding ourselves if we didn't realise that as well as those expensive offices our employers are currently offloading, there are a lot of other costs they are figuring out that they don't need to pay.

 

[Tricky1982]

There's always these lot who are trying to campaign for an independent Northumbria, they're basically a load of labour nutjobs looking to copy Wee Nicky

The Northern Independence Party

 

[theinventor]

Next morning at 8am, Dinesh rolls out of his bed in his apartment in Bangalore, charges up his laptop and starts his new job.

It won't happen to every job, but as I have said many times before, if you can do your job from home, there's a good likelihood someone in India can f&#k up your job just as well from his home for a tenth of the cost.

Perhaps. Most days I roll into my spare room office at 0730 and spend the first few hours un-f#&king whatever Dinesh and his mates have been doing for the last 4 hours. Then in the afternoon we get on with some proper work before going to bed and letting the offshore team rinse & repeat for the next day.