How to Deal with an NCO

[Kroneit44]

Definitely a job for the reserve CoC not the PSIs, although I’d be surprised if they haven’t already made their opinions known. Ours don’t usually hold back, which is how it should be.

I don't agree. The reserve CoC in the unit I served in was tonk. You would only get something done if you went to the PSIs. I would advise the OP to assess the ground first and decide who to go to. Who is go to process the conversation in the most professional manner etc. This might be the reserve CoC.

 

[Mrsheeny]

That sounds like some progress. Stay cool.

This was last year, so I had my opportunity then but didn't want to throw anyone under the bus.

 

[retread2]

The above said, try the old 'wait till he is asleep in billets, take a bucket of quick setting cement and gently dip his hand in it'. He will swamp the bed. Replace hand, remove bucket and extract the michael mercilessly for being a pitswamper. He may leave from embarrassment.

Or this.

 

[SONAR-BENDER]

@Ravers you little ******* beauty.
Crickets.

Another idea COULD be either placing small bits of bamboo root into his lawn and/or borders, or chucking some mushroom spores onto his lawn*.
Both will literally see results soon!



* For an added bonus, use the loose spores to spell out 'KNOB' on his lawn - to be read from the house obviously!

 

[JAD]

I knew some regulars who took pride in swamping out.

I recall a few midnight firemen too that had orientation schisms on the way to the heads.

I knew some regulars who took pride in swamping out.

 

[JAD]

Another idea COULD be either placing small bits of bamboo root into his lawn and/or borders, or chucking some mushroom spores onto his lawn*.
Both will literally see results soon!



* For an added bonus, use the loose spores to spell out 'KNOB' on his lawn - to be read from the house obviously!

Do you have, how you say...., "prior" of this practice per chance SONAR? My cress seeds sketch on a freshly sprinkled anti static carpet seems very Rymans League in comparison. Custodian of the carpet in question, on the floor of a one man grot of a universally disposed tube who had managed to wangle 2 weeks of compassionate leave (later to be confirmed as boll@cks btw) whilst we were all gearing up for pre deployment beat up. His carpet was in full bloom upon his return; the d1ck head concerned was mighty pished off, (bonus) however this had to be relayed to us by the rear party as we'd all gone on an intensive drinkin... errr range camp to Sennelager.

 

[Just_plain_you]

That sounds like some progress. Stay cool.

CO's office? Sounds like there is more to this tale...

 

[SONAR-BENDER]

Do you have, how you say...., "prior" of this practice per chance SONAR?

Sadly no...... but there may have been a small weedkiller spillage (same results!) at a house nearby.........

I believe an old washing up liquid bottle can be a very effective delivery device. Obviously told by a mate.

 

[Accidental_discharge]

The above said, try the old 'wait till he is asleep in billets, take a bucket of cold water and gently dip his hand in it'. He will swamp the bed. Replace hand, remove bucket and extract the michael mercilessly for being a pitswamper. He may leave from embarrassment.

Why bother with the bucket? Just whip out your old man, and swamp him yourself.

 

[Dwarf]

Why bother with the bucket? Just whip out your old man, and swamp him yourself.

Were you in the Mortar Plt with Wor Kid?

 

[JAD]

Sadly no...... but there may have been a small weedkiller spillage (same results!) at a house nearby.........

I believe an old washing up liquid bottle can be a very effective delivery device. Obviously told by a mate.

Got love a top tip like this on a Friday afternoon.

 

[Accidental_discharge]

Why bother with the bucket? Just whip out your old man, and swamp him yourself.

If he woke up one day thoroughly swamped, and "someone" had taken a shit in his Pringles tube, possibly, however this is not an admission of guilt.

 

[arcticfox042]

I have had to referee/mediate or clear up the wreckage of more than a few of these in the project world and it's very easy for it to get out of control rapidly.
From my perspective as a manager it's far, far better if it's brought to me in advance so a friendly word or a careful eye can be kept on the situation.
I'm sensitive to the fact you're reluctant to be seen by him or others to have gone over his head, but in the case of someone acting all superior and being a donkey cock it's really your best option, especially if his behaviour is apparent to other folks.

I've had plenty of serving folks working for me and it's not unknown for some jumped up arrse to put other people's backs up I deal with it the same as I would with suppliers and civ staff.

Bollox.... just drop the ******............!!!!!

 

[bob_the_bomb]

The above said, try the old 'wait till he is asleep in billets, take a bucket of cold water and gently dip his hand in it'. He will swamp the bed. Replace hand, remove bucket and extract the michael mercilessly for being a pitswamper. He may leave from embarrassment.

Tried it. Doesn’t work.

 

[Accidental_discharge]

Tried it. Doesn’t work.

Then bash his head in with the bucket.

 

[Dwarf]

Tried it. Doesn’t work.

Doing it wrong then. I took it from Milligan in his first book.
Partner's son went to do his National Service (Spain) and I told him about it in case there were any arrseholes that get them all in trouble.
There was, he did, it worked. Pit swamped, job jobbed.
He said thanks, partner was horrified.

 

[Cutaway]

Correct. It all has a slightly different dynamic which requires a nuanced approach.

Bet you appreciated Brotherton Lad's advice and assistance.

 

[overopensights]

Jumping in here, as I don't know where to ask this! Please see a really well made cutting tool Its about 150mm long and indeed extremely very well made.

Does anyone know what it's for? Please tap to enlarge.

 

[anglo]

Jumping in here, as I don't know where to ask this! Please see a really well made cutting tool Its about 150mm long and indeed extremely very well made.

Does anyone know what it's for? Please tap to enlarge.

It's for trimming nose hair.

 

[A signaller]

Jumping in here, as I don't know where to ask this! Please see a really well made cutting tool Its about 150mm long and indeed extremely very well made.

Does anyone know what it's for? Please tap to enlarge.

Its for cutting plugs of tobacco. My grandfather (1897-1967) had a similar tool, he got his tobacco from the london docks, wrapped up , sausage shaped about 12 in long.