How to beat your wife

Have I just woken up on another planet or in a fcuking timewarp????
I'd like to see him try that with some of the gentle ladies in my manor.
They'd feed him his bollox in a kebab.
Don't ask me where they'd put the chilli sauce!
I thought it was very informative.

I've often wondered how to do it without bruising showing. Dark glasses are soooo 1980s. I think I'll concentrate on her mid section from now on.
I've got a hose pipe filled with gravel in the shed (a tip I learned from Uncle Saddam ;)). It works wonders.

Take your point ref the midrif but the only time that is exposed is when she's bench pressing a Jag back axle. The rump in no good because she just thinks it's a bedroom game.

I'll stick to the back of my hand across the temple. She can wear a balaclava when out getting my dinner.
If he hits you and you bleed, its his fault. If he hits you and you don't bleed but subsequently fall on the corner of a table and bleed, it's your fault. You should have been more careful when falling over.
This is terrible!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No mention of hob nail boots!

No mention of a heaviy studded leather belt!!

No mention of auto asphyxiation!!

Muslims are f[/b]ucking fannies !!

No propper bird loves her bloke unless she is sporting the "love token" of a black eye administered during some "heavy petting"

cking homos

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