How many does it take?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by planters, Mar 29, 2005.

  1. I need some more kokes that start:

    How many ........ does it take to change a lightbulb?

    What do you call a man/woman with a ..... on their head?
     
  2. How many Pioneers does it take to change a lightbulb?

    10

    1 To change it and 9 to grumble about all the s**t jobs they get.
     
  3. msr

    msr LE

    What do you call...?

    A man with a shovel in his head?
    Doug
    A man without a shovel in his head?
    Douglas
    A lady with a toothpick in her head?
    Olive
    A lady with one leg longer than the other?
    Eileen
    A Chinese lady with one leg longer than the other?
    Irene
    A lady with both legs the same length?
    Nolene
    An epileptic in a pile of leaves?
    Russell
    A man with a wooden head?
    Edward
    A man with three wooden heads?
    Edward Woodward
    A man with four wooden heads?
    I don't know, but Edward Woodward would
    A man with a rabbit up his bum?
    Warren
    A man with his legs chopped off at the knees?
    Neil
    A man who is being electrocuted?
    Buzz
    A man who sits at your front door?
    Matt
    A man who has his head stuck under your car?
    Jack
    A man who has no arms and legs who is nailed to the wall?
    Art
    The arms and legs of the above mentioned man?
    Pieces of Art
    A man with no arms and legs floating in the ocean?
    Bob
    A lady who is the stand-in for Polly in Fawlty Towers?
    Polly - filler
    A man with toilet paper in his mouth?
    John
    A man who has been buried for 2,000 years?
    Pete
    A dog with no legs?
    It doesn't matter what you call him - he still won't come
    A deer with no eyes?
    No idea
    A deer with no eyes and no legs?
    Still no idea
    A deer with no eyes and no legs who is chewing a razor?
    Still no bloody idea

    Lightbulb jokes:
    http://www.eyrie.org/~thad/strange/lightbulbs.html

    msr