How long on the job?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by old_bloke, Apr 7, 2009.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Why would you want to take longer it only cuts into sleep
  2. Waste of fucking time.
  3. You still shoot in your pants then?? Nevermind :D
  4. You speak from experience I take it.....

  5. I see what you've done there :roll:
    I wonder what the pay is for an official time keeper? Have to be salaried, you'd never fill your time sheet on an hourly rate.
  6. I only need a minute to feel satisfied, so why the fcuk do I need to get the spray??? If the bint has a problem getting off then tough titty's!
  7. Personally, I was impressed by their performance before the spray. Half a minute? Wow...
  8. hah!

    i wish the was a premature ejaculation spray. too much like hard work already when i'm tired/pissed up already if you ask me!
  9. i believe in 8 pints of stella makes me hard all night
  10. It's a rare occasion I've ever lasted less than twenty minutes unless circumstances dictated otherwise, on a train for example.
    I might not be able to repeat the feat of holding off for nine hours that I achieved in my twenties (recovered yet Anne Marie?) but less than twenty minutes? Ridiculous!
  11. Any more than 30 seconds is a waste of energy.

    Would you really want to feel like you had just finished an ICFT just to watch a perfect impression of a foaming bulldog walk off to the kazi with hand cupped over said impression?

    A birds clout after sex is indeed a frightful thing. An exploded fish spewing porridge. On top of that, if you flip em over to do the doggie doggie, you also have to watch a starfish expanding and contracting during the event.

    As long as we unload, who gives a fcuk about them?
  12. Not this call sign. I've got a clout like a wizard's sleeve and my arrse is the size of Brum.
  13. :glomp: :excited: :drool: