How do you kill 160,000 turkeys?

BBC News

If you ask me, gassing is for poofs and nazis, so the situation is:

You, 160,000 turkeys and the weapon of your choice, what do you use to get the job done?

My vote goes for one of these with thermobaric warheads. Has the added bonus of wiping Bernard Fcuking Matthews off the face of the earth :plotting:


a very blunt butter knife and a hand powered food whisk.
Liberal dose of anthrax in the next Liabour Party member's newsletter? Always aim to exceed your target.
Get Chubb, Blondebint, bettymoo, Sven, SLRboy, Chief Two and Dogface to eat them all.

Kills two birds with one stone so to speak.


Could always send them to sely oak where they would catch something really nasty.
I have always been of the opinion that mass raised birds, pigs, cattle etc using p1ss poor but barely legal husbandry is the biggest cause of animal health scares going!
You will need the following,

conveyer belt
swimming pool
27.5 KVA

Bzzzzt... then heat the swimming pool and make a couple of million gallons of turkey soup.
They can always gobble each other to death, come to think of it....Or as Mrs Driver said after our wedding when discussing the gift of a teasmade machine, 'there's nothing like starting the day with a nice goblin'.
Put the Home office in charge of it,that should solve the problem
Aren't the Turkeys overcrowded enough already - that is just plain cruel Rhodie!!!!

I'd like one of these please:

And a very very big truckload of ammo!


War Hero
Teach them to draw pictures of Mohammed?


Book Reviewer
Increase the number of virgins on offer to those that successfully do it themselves.
I don't know, but someone told me they thought all their christmases had come at once!

I know, I'll get my coat.


War Hero
pffft, and the government employs thinktanks why?

personally i'm tempted toward something involving my shed and either ANFO or a simple weedkiller and sugar mix....


I think the recipe for chicken curry can be altered here!

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