How do I get rid of whiskey breath?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Devil_Dog, Nov 26, 2008.

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  1. A couple of weeks ago, I was riding with a collegue to work and he remarked that I reeked of whiskey. No big deal since I know him and he knows me so no embarrassment there. But I spent the rest of the day avoiding all the usual people like my boss.

    The next week, somebody else pointendly asked (for everyone else within earshot to wonder) if somebody in the room had been drinking. She then shot me a withering glare.

    Last Sunday, I was sitting in church minding my own business when some guy behind me made some comment about over indulging in holy wine never mind the fact that they don't serve that stuff in my church. And if they did, I assure you, I would probably sneak in a small thermos flask of 40 proof to "fortify" said wine.

    Long story short, I have come to the realisation that while it never used to be the case, I seem to be retaining the smell of alcohol longer than most people. Sometimes I can still taste it in my mouth more than 24 hours after I wake up with a blinding hangover.

    I of course brush my teeth and take a shower every morning but it does not seem to help. A pal told me that it may not necessarily be my breath but that the stuff is actually oozing through my skin.

    So without lecturing me on the vices of drinking, how do I rid myself of the foul odors of the spirits that I sometimes ingest?
  2. Do what Hemmingway did and suck on the barrel of a shotgun with your toe on the trigger.
  3. QUIT drinking? sweat it out of you?
  4. Change your tipple mate, try for me, then you smell of apples! :)
  5. Drink vodka...... works for me then you smell of cheap Russian whores...... :roll:
  6. Shithouse, do what Texas does. Have somebody strap you to an electric chair then have them throw the switch.

    Fecking mong.
  7. Devil Dog:

    You have recognized that you have a problem, That is a great start. There are 12 steps to solving the problem.

    We admitted we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable.
    Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
    Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
    Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
    Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
    Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
    Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
    Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
    Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
    Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
    Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His Will for us and the power to carry that out.
    Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

    If you go to you can find a place near you where people can help you deal with this problem.

    Best of luck my friend. I wish you well with this
  8. Sounds a bit fecking dull to me :D

    Try heroine or methamphetamine instead, don't smell and you'll loose your job soon enough
  9. Well that explains a lot of your bollix, you're a soak.
    The rest of your tripe must still however be attributed to your psychosis.
    • Funny Funny x 1
  10. Whoa! First of all I am not an alcoholic. Alcoholics go to rehab. And miss work.

    Which reminds me of the old saying that goes something like: work is the curse of the drinking classes.
  11. Hmm sounds like you have quite the predicament there.

    Oh I haven't got a solution, just like to point out things. :D
  12. Drink more water - at least a pint - before you go to sleep on nights when you have been boozing.

    Use Dentyl Mouthwash before you sleep and in the morning and REALLY gargle with it. It takes all the boozy film out of your mouth and palate.

    If it's strong whiskey sweat, not just whiskey breath, you might have a problem - I'm not saying you are an alchy, but that your liver function might be weak. Drinking more fluids and taking Milk Thistle (one tablet ONLY) before you go to bed will help a lot. You can get it from Holland an Barrett and it's not hippy bollox - it's such a powerful anti-toxin it's injected as an antidote to snakebites.

    Or it could just be your personal hygiene isn't up to scratch, of course.
  13. I don't think I'll bother to plug in my givafuckometer.
  14. You could use fire.

    Torch your head, the smell of burning flesh and cow-shit will hide the scent of an alcohol dependant old septic.
  15. There is a regular poster on the Int Corps board called Whiskeybreath. Are you trying to tell us you are having some sort of relationship with him and reek of his manly stuff, must admit he never seemed the sort to me to be into mano-a-mano.

    However, if it really is the alcohol, get off the nectar of the gods and move to wine, it doesn't linger as badly, but if drinking the red stuff watch out for the curse of the purple tongue.