How do astronauts wank?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by fairy_nuff, Feb 14, 2011.

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  1. Just been on the news that a group of blokes, would be astronauts or cosmonauts as the Russians call them, have been locked up for a year in Moscow. This was an experiment to see if they could stand the trip to Mars. So on Valnetine's Eve, I thought I would ask the Master Baiters there opinion on how they manage
     
  2. maguire

    maguire LE Book Reviewer

    frequently, I would think.
     
  3. rampant

    rampant LE Reviewer Book Reviewer

    I wonder how quickly the act of ejaculation would propel you backwards & how far. I mean if you managed to line yourself up with the hatches a long the length of the space station, could spaffing propel you from one end to the other?
     
  4. Ewwwwwwwwwww at all the man fat just floating about after a year.
     
  5. They don't have to wear the full gear on the trip, only on the surface, if they make it there. So basically, if they can take a shit, a wank is no problem.

    Anyway raise your thoughts to a higher plane, like how to make me spaff by internet.
     
  6. Carefully, or its huston we have a problem
     
  7. Like all the rest of us, just with one hand mostly.
     
  8. Well I think they have a 20 minute delay on 'radio' communications so it would be a while before you knew you'd been caught, although the 50000000 cameras might put you off a bit (depending on your preferences). The zero-gravity and radiation implications of trans-Martian onanism doesn't bear thinknig about though!
     
  9. In a real spacecraft that would be very dangerous. Given that they don't even use pencils in space because loose graphite could short circuit something important. So they probably have a waterproof wank sock issued.
     
  10. Why you can't tell the difference between a fanny and the wall
     
  11. On the other hand if you wore one of these bad boys it would probably feel like someone else was doing it, turn it around on completion and you have a handy receptacle.

    [​IMG]
     
  12. Sometimes the wall is preferable when you see next morning what you've picked up whilst pissed.

    Fuckin' excuses, always excuses.
     
  13. 3 years' supply of bromide.

    And a dozen hookers working round the clock when they get back.
     
  14. Complete with nobbly bits,, 24 min to cum up with the solution!!!! You are highly commended for STAFF college and a RISE. Or does that just deserve a big HAND??
     
  15. No need any more just post them to Palace Barrack!