how bone is your missus.

DK27

Old-Salt
Mrs DK27 spent many years working in the electronics trade. This included aerospace, defence systems and commercial jet comms and radar systems.

Not too long after I installed SKY, I got a phone call, a panicked phone call when I was on night shift. Transcript as best as I can remember;

Starts;

Mrs: You have to something! The TV has packed up! (What was I supposed to do, tell my boss I had to go? I worked 25 miles away from my home.)
Me: Packed up as in blank or anything at all?
Mrs: Just says no signal.
Me: Are you on AV1?
Mrs: Yes.
Me: Is the SKY box switched on? (followed by long pause so I know the answer.)
Mrs: Yes, oh its OK now it has just started working. Sorry to have troubled you even though you were of no help. I have sorted it now.

Ends:

No wonder the UK electronics industry went down the pan...

At least there was a beacon butty waiting for me when I got in.:)
 
Herself told you she was going to use the mower
you knew there was a recurring problem with it running out of fuel, and potentially oil and air
you didn’t immediately stop and check these things, despite having been told of her intentions

not really seeing much of a defence for you here, it’s obviously your fault

If showing her fecks knows how many times how to first parade it doesn't get through to her then to hell with her. I have plenty to do without having to micro manage everything she does.

If she screws up the engine because of something she didn't do then she can cut her grass with the walk behind mower.
 

Helm

MIA
Moderator
Book Reviewer
Mrs DK27 spent many years working in the electronics trade. This included aerospace, defence systems and commercial jet comms and radar systems.

Not too long after I installed SKY, I got a phone call, a panicked phone call when I was on night shift. Transcript as best as I can remember;

Starts;

Mrs: You have to something! The TV has packed up! (What was I supposed to do, tell my boss I had to go? I worked 25 miles away from my home.)
Me: Packed up as in blank or anything at all?
Mrs: Just says no signal.
Me: Are you on AV1?
Mrs: Yes.
Me: Is the SKY box switched on? (followed by long pause so I know the answer.)
Mrs: Yes, oh its OK now it has just started working. Sorry to have troubled you even though you were of no help. I have sorted it now.

Ends:

No wonder the UK electronics industry went down the pan...

At least there was a beacon butty waiting for me when I got in.:)
A light in the darkness no doubt.
 
Mrs DK27 spent many years working in the electronics trade. This included aerospace, defence systems and commercial jet comms and radar systems.

Not too long after I installed SKY, I got a phone call, a panicked phone call when I was on night shift. Transcript as best as I can remember;

Starts;

Mrs: You have to something! The TV has packed up! (What was I supposed to do, tell my boss I had to go? I worked 25 miles away from my home.)
Me: Packed up as in blank or anything at all?
Mrs: Just says no signal.
Me: Are you on AV1?
Mrs: Yes.
Me: Is the SKY box switched on? (followed by long pause so I know the answer.)
Mrs: Yes, oh its OK now it has just started working. Sorry to have troubled you even though you were of no help. I have sorted it now.

Ends:

No wonder the UK electronics industry went down the pan...

At least there was a beacon butty waiting for me when I got in.:)

That would have been a light snack, then.
 
Certainly light me up when it was early December and I could smell it walking down the road. A beacon home so to say. Hence, beacon sandwich....
Jamaican walt
 

wheel

LE
Mrs DK27 spent many years working in the electronics trade. This included aerospace, defence systems and commercial jet comms and radar systems.

Not too long after I installed SKY, I got a phone call, a panicked phone call when I was on night shift. Transcript as best as I can remember;

Starts;

Mrs: You have to something! The TV has packed up! (What was I supposed to do, tell my boss I had to go? I worked 25 miles away from my home.)
Me: Packed up as in blank or anything at all?
Mrs: Just says no signal.
Me: Are you on AV1?
Mrs: Yes.
Me: Is the SKY box switched on? (followed by long pause so I know the answer.)
Mrs: Yes, oh its OK now it has just started working. Sorry to have troubled you even though you were of no help. I have sorted it now.

Ends:

No wonder the UK electronics industry went down the pan...

At least there was a beacon butty waiting for me when I got in.:)
The UK electronics industry is strong and well. I take it she has left the industry.
 
I went over to a mates place earlier today to give him a hand cutting up wood and herself tells me that while I'm gone she's going to cut the grass around the house on the riding mower. I get to my mates place and we have just started cutting wood when his phone rings.

He hands it to me and tells me it's herself on the phone. I ask her what she wants and she tells me all huffy like that the riding mower won't start. I ask her if it's turning over and she tells me it is but I need to come home to fix the mower.

I tell her it will be a while as we've just started work and I'm not going to leave before the job is done. She gets all stroppy about it and hangs up on me, when I get home she's still in a huff about it.

I go out to the shed to have a look at the mower and see what the problem is, well it took me all of thirty seconds to find the problem. I went back into the house and told her it works just fine and there is nothing wrong with it but yes there was a problem and if she will follow me I'll show her what it was for future reference.

We go out to the shed and stand by the mower and she asks me what the problem was when I say nothing, I tell her it was a user error. She asks me what I mean by user error and I tell her the user made the error of not checking to see if there was any gasoline in the fecking tank before trying to start it.

Feck knows how many times I've showed her how to check the oil and told her to check it every time she goes to use the mower as well as checking the petrol and the tyre pressure.

She just stood there looking at me like a stunned Knut, I could see my words going in one ear and out the fecking other one.
Sometimes I think they do it on purpose. They can't be charged with murder if you have a rant and die of a stroke. Therefore they get to keep the insurance money. How much has she got you insured for?
 
Sometimes I think they do it on purpose. They can't be charged with murder if you have a rant and die of a stroke. Therefore they get to keep the insurance money. How much has she got you insured for?
Nothing to do with insurance mate, in her case it's just being bone at times.
 
Nothing to do with insurance mate, in her case it's just being bone at times.
You're among friends here.
You can tell the truth.
It's 24/7, isn't it.
I know it is with mine.
Before setting out today for a trip to see the youngest grandson, "Have you closed the windows, locked the back door, turned off the iron, got your tablets, locked the front door, put your coat in the car, unplugged the iron, put the cases in the car". Not all said at once. Oh no. Each said individually at roughly 45 second intervals as the various things fluttered across the air gap between her ears. My silence to each bone question probably didn't help her mood but we all need a hobby, eh?
 
You're among friends here.
You can tell the truth.
It's 24/7, isn't it.
I know it is with mine.
Before setting out today for a trip to see the youngest grandson, "Have you closed the windows, locked the back door, turned off the iron, got your tablets, locked the front door, put your coat in the car, unplugged the iron, put the cases in the car". Not all said at once. Oh no. Each said individually at roughly 45 second intervals as the various things fluttered across the air gap between her ears. My silence to each bone question probably didn't help her mood but we all need a hobby, eh?

That's the thing mate, she's a very, very smart lady but at times she is as bone as feck. Now I don't mind her being like this because it's helped me dodge incoming in the past.

However even explaining to her that even though the riding mower is not a car engine and it's smaller it is nonetheless still an engine that needs petrol, oil and also needs servicing. Alas nothing I tell her sticks in her brain until something fecks up then it's all "I didn't know...it's not my fault" BS.

Fortunately I'm not the shouty type, I usually just walk away chuckling to myself which she absolutely hates me doing because she says it makes her feel stupid.
 
This morning.Episode 438.
We have come away for a few days. We turn our house phone over to redirect to her mobile. She decides to test it to see if it is working. “It’s not working, you need to call BT to get it fixed”
Now of course, I could have mentioned that calling from her mobile to redirect her call to her mobile was not going to work. Despite the prospect of a 700 mile drive in total silence being appealing, I thought better of it and suggested she used my phone to check.
And for the time being peace has been restored.

If she rang the landline from her mobile and the landline was diverted to her mobile then she should get her voicemail or an engaged tone. Either of which would have told her it's working.
 
The shining light of my life has had a new idea, she suggests that we join the AMA and discontinue any maintenance and only repair the vehicles when they breakdown. She is a genius I can’t understand why doesn’t everyone run their vehicles her way, I’ve told her that there are no more doctors appointments for her, we will fix her when she stops functioning.
 
Over the last few days she's started retelling me something that she's already told me, which is a pain in the arrse if it's something topical. She then gets angry when I try and work out wether or not this is new news and I need to do something about it or old news and she's repeating it. Happens monthly. I think I should just ignore everything as that is generally what I'm accused of.
 

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