how bone is your missus.

Yokel

LE
I overheard this earlier today. A (supposedly intelligent) woman had got two new kittens, and took them to the vet to be neutered. She later phoned the practice to see how the kittens were doing. The receptionist asked for a name, so she gave her the kitten's names. No, the receptionist explained, she meant what surname. The reply was she did not know the surname of her new kittens as she had never asked.
 
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We're in COVID lockdown at the moment.

Her: "Do you want anything from the shops"
Me thinking my diet has been going well "How about a block of chocolate?"
Her: "Oh FFS, that means I have to go inside! I'm not doing that!"
Me: ?????????????????

For some reason, she was going to get cash out from an ATM which is outside the shopping centre. Not sure how this translates into "going to the shops" and why she would bother asking in the first place if she didn't want to go in.
 
What a nice hot sunny had here in our part of Aberdeenshire. Mrs WW hates the heat and has air con in the sitting room for her comfort, I popped in to see her about her new phone trouble ( to follow ) , the thing is thundering a way on full chat blowing a bit of cool air about. However I just had to ask why the doors and and windows are open, SWMBO in a mocking tone tells me its to let the breeze through, "Oh I say just like when you heat up the county in the wintertime... silence, for a while.
Back to the new phone, "Its very quiet I have the volume on full" , a cursory look reveals the screen protector is on upside down covering the speaker aperture. More silence.
Bliss
You have air-conditioning in Aberdeenshire? How often do you use that? Maybe wee Greta has a point after all.
 
Brilliant. She takes a bottle of orange juice out of the fridge, holds it up and peers really closely at the plastic seal around the top to see if it's broken and then asks me, "Have you opened this?". Why yes I have babe - as evidenced by the fact that the f*cking thing is half-empty.
 

miner69er

War Hero
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Apparently there is going to be a huge spike in Covid due to.

"All those idiots going to Wimbledon to watch the football"


Me.. Ummmmm

Her.. Oh **** off.. You better not put that on Arrse.



Me... Evil smile....
 
The other half brought the Grandson's new water guns that she'd bought them inside this afternoon.

It looked like rain & she "didn't want them to get wet".

After 40 years I'm still trying my utmost to make sense of some of the things she does.
 
Shoes. We are two in a fairly large house. There is a car port/shelter. Then an extension/annexe, then you enter the main house. The main house is open plan thanks to a previous owner. So loads of space to divest yourself of overcoats, umbrellas, shoes etc.
No. She enters the house, steps out of her shoes and walks on. The shoes remain where she left them, and can stay there for some time if I don’t tidy.
Perhaps she was a princess in an earlier life.
And I was a butler in another
Yair, late, I know … but, how far down the back yard would they get if they were to be, say … thrown … individually, hmmm?
 
She's finally decided we need to clear out the conservatory, AKA the dumping ground. It's about waist high in books, old toys, bits of crockery and other assorted tat. Some of the ARRSErati (no names) would **** their pants to see the amount of junk in there.

So she ordered some boxes from Amazon, the idea being that the British Heart Foundation will come and collect, thus saving me a trip or two in the car. That's fine by me. I've been assembling the boxes and passing them through to her, as I'm not allowed to sort through the crap in the conservatory. That's fine by me 2.

Imagine my befuddlement to observe her just now taking some books out of a box that's been in the conservatory for over a decade into one of the new boxes. I don't think I'll bother asking her why she's doing that, because the answer will only befuddle me even more no doubt.
 

Fang_Farrier

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
She's finally decided we need to clear out the conservatory, AKA the dumping ground. It's about waist high in books, old toys, bits of crockery and other assorted tat. Some of the ARRSErati (no names) would **** their pants to see the amount of junk in there.

So she ordered some boxes from Amazon, the idea being that the British Heart Foundation will come and collect, thus saving me a trip or two in the car. That's fine by me. I've been assembling the boxes and passing them through to her, as I'm not allowed to sort through the crap in the conservatory. That's fine by me 2.

Imagine my befuddlement to observe her just now taking some books out of a box that's been in the conservatory for over a decade into one of the new boxes. I don't think I'll bother asking her why she's doing that, because the answer will only befuddle me even more no doubt.


We are sorting stuff out prior to a house move.

Things are coming out of cupboards and the attic to be sifted into various piles.

Things that have been kept in boxes and not accessed in over a decade are being classed essential and consigned to the storage container
 
We are sorting stuff out prior to a house move.

Things are coming out of cupboards and the attic to be sifted into various piles.

Things that have been kept in boxes and not accessed in over a decade are being classed essential and consigned to the storage container

Let me guess. The Mrs.
In a few years time when you're finished in the Falklands you'll end up fetching it back again.
 

Fang_Farrier

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
Let me guess. The Mrs.
In a few years time when you're finished in the Falklands you'll end up fetching it back again.

Don't even get me started on the stuff we have sent South
 
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