how bone is your missus.

Gabion Groyne

Old-Salt
They really don't do well with technology unless it's Facebook or Twitter do they. Herself is starting a new project soon, this will be the third in the past year because she's started and never finished the last two.

Well she was trying to describe my Oscillating tool and blades that would be brilliant for her new project because her pal Maureen said so. After trying to describe it for me and me pretending I don't know what she's on about, she phones Maureen to ask what it's called.

She comes back and tells me what it's called and asks if I have one. Nope sorry hen, never needed one.

She's meeting Maureen in town tomorrow and borrowing the one Maureen's husband has. If said husband of Maureen is too dumb to lock his tools away then more fool him.

The dopey mare isn't getting any of mine.
The Dyson may as well be the International Space Station.
 

unicorn77

War Hero
This morning I am asked, seemingly out of the blue, "what was Gary's Mum's name?". Bear in mind (a) we have two family ex-partners called Gary (b) my puzzlement at being asked as I don't have a scooby doo to either. So I take the fatal step of asking "which one, Gary X or Gary Y". To which the reply of course is "no, Gary Z" who is an ex-neigbour from 20 years back.

Apparently, I was supposed to know which one from "the context" which was her looking at facebook. It's possible there may have been some references emanating from her direction, and further possible that she mistook my noddings and mutterings as indications that I was paying some attention. But that's just guessing.
 

anglo

LE
A seagull put a hole in the hedgehog feeder, the feeder looked something like this,

Hedgehog_station_social.jpg


So, I said I will make another and tape it, so the seagulls can't see inside

No, no she said, I will fix it, she is right the seagull can't get into any more

P1690059.JPG
 

Kirkz

LE
A seagull put a hole in the hedgehog feeder, the feeder looked something like this,

View attachment 580348

So, I said I will make another and tape it, so the seagulls can't see inside

No, no she said, I will fix it, she is right the seagull can't get into any more

View attachment 580350
Don't be so sure they are tenacious buggers.
 
It has now become a regular thing that while herself is having treatment on a Friday morning, I leg it, complete with list, to do the shopping.
This morning we got back home and as I unpacked the bags became aware of a gimlet eye followed by: ‘You idiot! I didn’t put washing-up gloves on the list!’
‘Oh, but you did. Look!’
There it was, in b&w, in her own fair hand: ‘Marigolds’.
Now, I am naturally not good with pastel shades (assessed CP3), which also disqualifies me from the soft-furnishing department. She has now added flowers to that list.
But how the hell was I supposed to know?
 

potter

Old-Salt
It has now become a regular thing that while herself is having treatment on a Friday morning, I leg it, complete with list, to do the shopping.
This morning we got back home and as I unpacked the bags became aware of a gimlet eye followed by: ‘You idiot! I didn’t put washing-up gloves on the list!’
‘Oh, but you did. Look!’
There it was, in b&w, in her own fair hand: ‘Marigolds’.
Now, I am naturally not good with pastel shades (assessed CP3), which also disqualifies me from the soft-furnishing department. She has now added flowers to that list.
But how the hell was I supposed to know?
Ah yes, the ambiguous shopping list.

Early December. "Crackers", the next line after "Nice cheese". I came home with a lovely selection from the biscuit aisle. Supposedly I was not meant to use contextual inference, and instead should have inserted the word "Christmas" in front of "Crackers".
 

9.414

War Hero
Mrs B up early to answer phone causing much dog excitement which of course in turn forces me to get up.

Long story short: going to see mother who is "not well"

I indicated my belief that this was yet more manipulative BS but pausing only to accuse me of being nasty, off she goes.

Rotten journey & when she gets there astonished to find mother alive, well and fully dressed. And since all better now demanding to be taken to a retail park because her idiot husband had driven car into garden wall yesterday and knackered radiator

And so Mrs B calls me sniffing to say how unhappy, deceived and manipulated she feels.

From a retail park.
 

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ancienturion

LE
Book Reviewer
women and past.jpg
 
REO Speedwagon was just playing on't wireless. She comments that since Peter Cetera left, he did well in his solo career, and the band went on to bigger things because the other guy took over the drumming and main vocals. I do a quick Google, and Cetera was never in Speedwagon. As he is the only drummer/singer from that era that I can think of, I mention Phil Collins. Which is the person she was thinking of.

After some to-ing and fro-ing, we establish that she means Phil Collins taking over from Peter Gabriel in Genesis, but that she was actually thinking of Peter Cetera (who was replaced by Jason Scheff) when he left the band Chicago. None of which had anything to do with REO Speedwagon.

She then admits that she was confusing the issue....
(re: My bold)
Was it your fault? ;-)
 

ancienturion

LE
Book Reviewer
Neither did I. I will have to look tomorrow when I am in the car.

Actually, I did. and there is a symbol indicating the side the fuel filler cap is, which I had never noticed before. Being older I know where the fuel filler cap is and merely tend to look at the fuel gauge which gives me a clue as to whether I need to fill up today.
 
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It has now become a regular thing that while herself is having treatment on a Friday morning, I leg it, complete with list, to do the shopping.
This morning we got back home and as I unpacked the bags became aware of a gimlet eye followed by: ‘You idiot! I didn’t put washing-up gloves on the list!’
‘Oh, but you did. Look!’
There it was, in b&w, in her own fair hand: ‘Marigolds’.
Now, I am naturally not good with pastel shades (assessed CP3), which also disqualifies me from the soft-furnishing department. She has now added flowers to that list.
But how the hell was I supposed to know?
In fairness I use a shorthand to write shopping lists.

Nothing involving BATCO, just slight abbreviations.

First one to guess what " W' up liquid " is wins a prize.

Best be quick as she has a 7 year headstart on you.
 
In fairness I use a shorthand to write shopping lists.

Nothing involving BATCO, just slight abbreviations.

First one to guess what " W' up liquid " is wins a prize.

Best be quick as she has a 7 year headstart on you.
Likewise, but she made out the list sometime during the night because she couldn’t sleep!
 

ancienturion

LE
Book Reviewer
In fairness I use a shorthand to write shopping lists.

Nothing involving BATCO, just slight abbreviations.

First one to guess what " W' up liquid " is wins a prize.

Best be quick as she has a 7 year headstart on you.

Plenty of time then.
 
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