how bone is your missus.


"Many older properties have cold water storage tanks in the roof space or loft. In most cases thisstorage tank will provide cold water to upstairs bathrooms but in some properties all of the cold water taps may be fed from this tank."

"In older houses the kitchen cold tap maybe the only tap connected directly to the mains."

Every house I have lived in has been like that - 1950s, 1920s, 19th century, 16th century.

New properties tend to connect the mains feed up. I've seen two different reasons given for the usage of a water storage tank - 1) to cope during any supply issue and 2) to prevent impurities getting back into the main. No idea if either is correct.
My mothers house is 1950's and also has the bathroom cold taps on the mains. Mind you, it is a bungalow, so that might make a difference.
It definitely hasn't been re-configured since my parents bought it in 1982. Again, though, there is high mains pressure there.
 

Kirkz

LE
Used to be just one cold tap connected to mains with rest fed from tank but that's changed, I think getting rid of back boilers and emersion tanks might have something to do with it. Might be talking bollocks though.
 

anglo

LE

"Many older properties have cold water storage tanks in the roof space or loft. In most cases thisstorage tank will provide cold water to upstairs bathrooms but in some properties all of the cold water taps may be fed from this tank."

"In older houses the kitchen cold tap maybe the only tap connected directly to the mains."

Every house I have lived in has been like that - 1950s, 1920s, 19th century, 16th century.

New properties tend to connect the mains feed up. I've seen two different reasons given for the usage of a water storage tank - 1) to cope during any supply issue and 2) to prevent impurities getting back into the main. No idea if either is correct.
The tank system was used to stop the back boiler system from running out of water, if the main
water supply was lost and the header tank level dropped, the hot water the boiler would
remain full and not blow up, Edit the water tanks where in the roof space and the water cylinder on the first floor to make the system work
See diagram

linkup2.gif
 
We have a black Kia Carens. I've noticed that Kia's have a distinctive grill shape, which bit of trivia I've pointed out to her. Her reaction at the time? "Oh yeah, that's right!"

Picking her up from work tonight I parked next to a Kia Sportage, a reasonably similar looking vehicle to the Carens if you close one eye and squint a bit with the other one.

So she walks out of the building and comes towards the car. Only to try to open the passengers door of the Sportage parked next to me. Luckily there was no one in it and she only tugged at the handle 3 times before looking up to see me staring at her.

She then got in our car. Me? I said not a dicky bird. Suicidal Sid I am not. My grin was a bit noticeable though.

The Sportage? It was a white one. One can only assume she'd clocked the grill shape and blanked the rest.

I swear to god I have no idea how she gets through life.
 
We have a black Kia Carens. I've noticed that Kia's have a distinctive grill shape, which bit of trivia I've pointed out to her. Her reaction at the time? "Oh yeah, that's right!"

Picking her up from work tonight I parked next to a Kia Sportage, a reasonably similar looking vehicle to the Carens if you close one eye and squint a bit with the other one.

So she walks out of the building and comes towards the car. Only to try to open the passengers door of the Sportage parked next to me. Luckily there was no one in it and she only tugged at the handle 3 times before looking up to see me staring at her.

She then got in our car. Me? I said not a dicky bird. Suicidal Sid I am not. My grin was a bit noticeable though.

The Sportage? It was a white one. One can only assume she'd clocked the grill shape and blanked the rest.

I swear to god I have no idea how she gets through life.
Have you checked to see if any of her boyfriends have a Kia Sportage? :)

I walked out of a Restaurant slightly behind an ex-girlfriend once... she walked up to a red Ford Capri and tried opening the passenger door...I climbed into my Audi and left her standing there...my ex-mate owned a red Capri.
 
Have you checked to see if any of her boyfriends have a Kia Sportage? :)

I walked out of a Restaurant slightly behind an ex-girlfriend once... she walked up to a red Ford Capri and tried opening the passenger door...I climbed into my Audi and left her standing there...my ex-mate owned a red Capri.
She's too idle to have a boyfriend. Which all potential boyfriends can be very grateful for.
 
Yesterday sitting on the patio I asked if anything was on the cards for the day and received a negatory answer. "Okay Dokey, I'm going to hop on my bike and go up to the $$ store then."

"Oh, can you grab one of those cooked Chickens and some salad stuff for tonight...and a bag of milk?"

"That is NOT a simple one stop trip and I'm not carrying a chicken, salad stuff, and a bag of milk on my bike!!"

It fell on deaf ears, the list grew bigger. Car it is.

So after coviding the grocery store I return home with 6 bags of grocery stuff and my tiny bag which would have easily fit on the bike.

"What, No chicken??"

"Try opening ALL the bags before complaining bitch!!" Omitting the last word coz I don't want to die yet.

"Where's all the salad stuff I asked for?"

I grabbed the bags and started tossing items on the counter.

Spring Onions.
Salad dressing.
Cheese.
Beets.
Branston Pickle.
Sliced Turkey, Ham. Chicken, & Roast Beef.
Radish.
Tomatoes.
Spicy pepper Tuna.
From the fridge I tossed out
Lettuce.
Pearl Onion.
Red Onion &
More cheese.

THIS IS THE TOTALLY CRAP SALAD THAT I BOUGHT NOTHING FOR.
20200703_142722.jpg

All that effort was eaten in silence because of ONE sentence and ONE reply that was NOT said in jest and that was "Did you not get a Cucumber?"

and the reply.

"Buying Cucumber is a waste of time because they are not dildo's!"

Her red face was priceless.

Spanky patted himself on the back..Owned and smacked down bitch!!
 

CRmeansCeilingReached

ADC
Moderator
Mrs CR runs an online business selling cross-stitch patterns. She was telling me about an angry email received from a lady customer in the USA.

Mrs Angry wrote to complain that she has been waiting for her order to be delivered for two months. "I know you're in the UK but I bought stuff from [another UK company] only four weeks ago and they have delivered already." Terrible company, terrible service, complain complain, sort out your delivery!! etc.

Mrs Angry had purchased a digital .pdf download.

It states this very prominently about 9 times from webpage to basket to confirmation email. All she had to do was click on the clearly-marked link in the email sent back in May. She did feel a little silly and apologetic when her mistake was explained. :)
 

Tool

LE
HiD walked into the kitchen muttering under her breath yesterday. I took my life into my hands and asked what the matter was.
"The cat's poo'ed on the bathmat, and someone just folded the mat over without cleaning it up" she says.
We have a discussion about whether it was the sprog (more likely) or the sprogette, who worked a night shift and came in knackered at silly o'clock this morning. The discussion continues about why they do not clean up the cat poo, and just spray the bathroom with room freshener. This means that someone else has to clean up after the cat, who 'belongs*' to the family. The discussion continues in this vein for a few minutes.

"So", I say (the emperor Mong sitting on my shoulders made me do it, I swear), " is the mat in the washing machine that is running at the moment?"
"No" she says, "You know I don't like picking up cat shit".


* Everyone knows that you never own a cat - you are just their slaves...
 
Yesterday sitting on the patio I asked if anything was on the cards for the day and received a negatory answer. "Okay Dokey, I'm going to hop on my bike and go up to the $$ store then."

"Oh, can you grab one of those cooked Chickens and some salad stuff for tonight...and a bag of milk?"

"That is NOT a simple one stop trip and I'm not carrying a chicken, salad stuff, and a bag of milk on my bike!!"

It fell on deaf ears, the list grew bigger. Car it is.

So after coviding the grocery store I return home with 6 bags of grocery stuff and my tiny bag which would have easily fit on the bike.

"What, No chicken??"

"Try opening ALL the bags before complaining bitch!!" Omitting the last word coz I don't want to die yet.

"Where's all the salad stuff I asked for?"

I grabbed the bags and started tossing items on the counter.

Spring Onions.
Salad dressing.
Cheese.
Beets.
Branston Pickle.
Sliced Turkey, Ham. Chicken, & Roast Beef.
Radish.
Tomatoes.
Spicy pepper Tuna.
From the fridge I tossed out
Lettuce.
Pearl Onion.
Red Onion &
More cheese.

THIS IS THE TOTALLY CRAP SALAD THAT I BOUGHT NOTHING FOR.
View attachment 487323
All that effort was eaten in silence because of ONE sentence and ONE reply that was NOT said in jest and that was "Did you not get a Cucumber?"

and the reply.

"Buying Cucumber is a waste of time because they are not dildo's!"

Her red face was priceless.

Spanky patted himself on the back..Owned and smacked down bitch!!
Dude I hear and sympathize with you. But all that $h!t and hassle could have been avoided with a few simple words.

Which part of " I'm going to hop on my bike " didn't you understand? It's a bike, not a fecking car. You want it you go get it, I'm on my bike.
 
I have good news that herself has kept quite about until earlier this evening. Recently due to the Covid-19 outbreak she volunteered to come out of retirement and go back to work.

She received a letter last week (unbeknownst to me) asking if she would consider working two days a week at the local Indian reservation hospital because the doctor that was more or less qualified in the same field of medicine as her had flown the coop and gone elsewhere.

It doesn't involve her doing any surgical procedures. it's more her recognizing patients who need to be referred quickly for surgical treatment.

She informed me tonight that being back in the thick of things during the pandemic made here realize that she missed working and so she has decided to accept the offer of working the two days a week.

Oh please be still my soaring and happy heart. :boogie:
 
She's had an email from work with a PDF attachment that needs a password to open it. "They haven't sent me the password", she whined. So she's just rung work to ask for the password. Bloke at the other end said the password will have been sent in a separate email and to check her spam folder. "It's not there, I've checked, please send it again", she says and hangs up.

Two seconds later she pipes up, "Oh, it's here in the spam folder after all."

Women and technology. FS.
 
She's had an email from work with a PDF attachment that needs a password to open it. "They haven't sent me the password", she whined. So she's just rung work to ask for the password. Bloke at the other end said the password will have been sent in a separate email and to check her spam folder. "It's not there, I've checked, please send it again", she says and hangs up.

Two seconds later she pipes up, "Oh, it's here in the spam folder after all."

Women and technology. FS.
Password for anything in Spam folder is littlemetalkey
 
Ahh! the unmistakable smell and taste of hexi blocks.
I am convinced that the main reason the Army issued those things was so that recruits would have to scrub the shite out of their mess tins in basic. If I’m 18 years old and I’ve got a 30yr old Sgt screaming in my ear how much of a cnut I am because I have missed a little bit of the black shite all over the bottom of my mess tin, the only thing that is going to do is encourage me to eat the rations cold.

It did work, but in the same manner as an atomic demolition munition. I am sure the ADM would make short work of a bridge, but like fook do you want to use it.
 
It's her half day today. Picked her up from work to have her announce, "Drop me off at the hairdressers in town, I've got an appointment."
Me, "OK, when did you get that?"
Her, "Last week."
Well it's the first I've heard of it but hey-ho, off we go for the short drive into town.
"You might as well stay in town, I won't be long. I'm only having my hair cut and coloured."
So I'm thinking 40 minute round trip to home and back + "I won't be long" = an hour tops?
No worries. Off out of the car she jumps, happy as a pig in shit that she's getting her hair done for the first time since lockdown started.
Now where can I park in town for free as it's pissing down and I've no desire to wander around getting soaked for an hour? I know, Waitrose's car park. I can pop into the shop for a sandwich, surf ARRSE on the phone for a bit, job jobbed.

"I won't be long"? An hour? Nope.

An hour and 45 minutes before she rang to say she was ready to be picked up. That wasn't annoying to the point of wanting to chew the steering wheel. Was it?

She, like every woman, has no concept of time.

AT

FUCKING

ALL.

On top of that her hair costs her £100 or so a time.
Plus whatever "products" the hairdresser manages to con her into buying.
Every 5 weeks.
So north of £1k a year.
Now I'm not an unreasonable man, I don't begrudge her that.
What I do begrudge is the fact that she then goes and buys the hairdresser a fancy Christmas present every year, "Because she does my hair nice for me". Well for a grand a year I fucking well think she should but NOT get a present into the bargain my dear.
 
Not the missus but the daughter.
First of all I shit you not, this is true, she has just admitted it to me.

She has a house plant that needs re-potting and needing some guidance did the google thing, trouble was she couldn't remember it's name only that it had something to do with a religion/nationality.

All the time thinking it's a very weird name for a plant she spends ten minutes or so searching for How to repot a Creeping Muslim.

I was crying with laughter as she told me this on the phone.

The plant by the way(she eventually remembered) is called a Creeping Wandering Jew.
 
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Not the missus but the daughter.
First of all I shit you not, this is true, she has just admitted it to me.

She has a house plant that needs re-potting and needing some guidance did the google thing, trouble was she couldn't remember it's name only that it had something to do with a religion/nationality.

All the time thinking it's a very weird name for a plant she spends ten minutes or so searching for How to repot a Creeping Muslim.

I was crying with laughter as she told me this on the phone.

The plant by the way(she eventually remembered) is called a Creeping Jew.
Tell her to be careful or the internet police will be searching for her under the Radical and Religious Hatred Act 2006.

‘Or look for Spiderwort next time.
 
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