how bone is your missus.

Fang_Farrier

LE
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So are you saying it's a no no and should vanish from my house?
You can use it as varnish if you want

(Cetyl ammonium fluoride is used as a wood preservative)
 
Last night - Panzer is in dock for MOT & services, so I'm using her car, as she has gone off in the Suzuki to give daughter some driving practice.

Me: Which car do you want in the morning?
Her: I'll take the Suzuki
Me: OK fine, I'll leave my work stuff in the boot of your car

I have just watched her drive off in her car.
 
Last night - Panzer is in dock for MOT & services, so I'm using her car, as she has gone off in the Suzuki to give daughter some driving practice.

Me: Which car do you want in the morning?
Her: I'll take the Suzuki
Me: OK fine, I'll leave my work stuff in the boot of your car

I have just watched her drive off in her car.
I just read this to mine and although I thought what you wrote is crystal clear, I had to damn near resort to flowcharts and reconstructions using corgi toys to get what happened across. I despair.

However, she did amuse me earlier today. She'd just got into the passenger seat of her Skoda and the wind was blowing a hoolie, stopping her from shutting the door and pulling the door from her grip. She's as weak as fuck anyway, so I was about to get out and go around to shut it when she told me to hold her arm. She then leaned right out, grabbed the handle and shouted "PULL!".
It worked.
 
It gets better.

Having gone to the office in the Suzuki, the sun is blinding me so I reach for the moderately expensive pair of Ray-Bans that I left in the Suzuki for the occasions when I drive it. But they are not there. Nor are there any other sunglasses.

I text her "where are my sunglasses?"
Her: "I think no.2 sprog has them"
Me: "That's useful --- not"

I cannot figure why No.2 sprog (female) has taken my sunglasses out of the car.

It's obviously hereditary on the female side.
 
It gets better.

Having gone to the office in the Suzuki, the sun is blinding me so I reach for the moderately expensive pair of Ray-Bans that I left in the Suzuki for the occasions when I drive it. But they are not there. Nor are there any other sunglasses.

I text her "where are my sunglasses?"
Her: "I think no.2 sprog has them"
Me: "That's useful --- not"

I cannot figure why No.2 sprog (female) has taken my sunglasses out of the car.

It's obviously hereditary on the female side.
Some days it just flows from them.
 
EB snoozing away in the morning
Mrs EB - EB my cars broken down at the gym had to get friend to give me a lift home
EB - what wrong with it?
Mrs EB - when I put the key in no lights came on the dash, must be a flat battery
EB - Oh shit, then as I wake more - that's odd a flat battery in an hour, methinks
Mrs EB - and when i tried turning the steering wheel it wouldn't move
EB - Ok Ok - still waking up

Little while later

EB - say again about the steering wheel?
Mrs EB - when i tried to turn it it was stuck!
EB - um did you try that with the key in and turning both
Mrs EB - No why
EB - Well sounds like you got the steering lock on
Mrs EB - whats that?
EB - well it stops the steering wheel moving and wouldn't allow the ignition to start unless its turned off
Mrs EB - whats the point of that? stupid idea!
EB - yes my dear

A Little while later, after traveling all over town to drop kid off, travel to the Gym, jump in her car turn wheel and key and surprise surprise the car starts.

EB - there you go my dear
Mrs EB - oh it must have fixed itself

EB walking away muttering - of course it fucking did - 30 years driving ffs
 
EB snoozing away in the morning
Mrs EB - EB my cars broken down at the gym had to get friend to give me a lift home
EB - what wrong with it?
Mrs EB - when I put the key in no lights came on the dash, must be a flat battery
EB - Oh shit, then as I wake more - that's odd a flat battery in an hour, methinks
Mrs EB - and when i tried turning the steering wheel it wouldn't move
EB - Ok Ok - still waking up

Little while later

EB - say again about the steering wheel?
Mrs EB - when i tried to turn it it was stuck!
EB - um did you try that with the key in and turning both
Mrs EB - No why
EB - Well sounds like you got the steering lock on
Mrs EB - whats that?
EB - well it stops the steering wheel moving and wouldn't allow the ignition to start unless its turned off
Mrs EB - whats the point of that? stupid idea!
EB - yes my dear

A Little while later, after traveling all over town to drop kid off, travel to the Gym, jump in her car turn wheel and key and surprise surprise the car starts.

EB - there you go my dear
Mrs EB - oh it must have fixed itself

EB walking away muttering - of course it ******* did - 30 years driving ffs
We have a really stupid automatic that will not start if the selector lever is in D or R.
 
I shit you not, she did. I'm not supposed to know this but the service manager "mentioned" it when I took the motor in for a recall job.
How big was the grin on his face?
 
We have a really stupid automatic that will not start if the selector lever is in D or R.
Dunno how that ever comes up. The last ooh, I dunno, say 15 cars we've had with auto boxes, you can't turn the engine off or remove the key (for those with physical keys), unless it's in P or N. Once it's in P or N, and engine is off, you can't move the shift into D, R, or 1/2 etc. So the "problem" never comes up.

You'd have to defeat the interlock that stops this from happening. Not saying the truly determined couldn't find a way to do this, but it's not going to be straightforward. At least on the Fords, Chevys, Dodges, Mercs, VWs and Jags we've had over the years with autoboxes.

Current vehicles (RAM truck, Merc GLE) go one better. Stop the car, foot on brake, still in D. Open the door. Both put themselves in P and engage the parking brake. Fire it up, foot on brake and select D. Parking brake automatically disengaged. Not rocket science, but certainly a handy feature.
 
Dunno how that ever comes up. The last ooh, I dunno, say 15 cars we've had with auto boxes, you can't turn the engine off or remove the key (for those with physical keys), unless it's in P or N. Once it's in P or N, and engine is off, you can't move the shift into D, R, or 1/2 etc. So the "problem" never comes up.

You'd have to defeat the interlock that stops this from happening. Not saying the truly determined couldn't find a way to do this, but it's not going to be straightforward. At least on the Fords, Chevys, Dodges, Mercs, VWs and Jags we've had over the years with autoboxes.

Current vehicles (RAM truck, Merc GLE) go one better. Stop the car, foot on brake, still in D. Open the door. Both put themselves in P and engage the parking brake. Fire it up, foot on brake and select D. Parking brake automatically disengaged. Not rocket science, but certainly a handy feature.
Errrrm, I was being sarcastic/humerous.
 
Errrrm, I was being sarcastic/humerous.
I thought you were saying Mrs R had complained about it. I'm sure some bird has at sometime, as they try and force it into D :)
 
Errrrm, I was being sarcastic/humerous.
I hired a car in the States once and got seriously pissed off with the safety features. Get in the car, put the key in the ignition start it up and drive.
Not being told to put on safety belts, lock the doors, put your foot on the brake before you put it into drive.
Plus many other ones that i cannot remember.
 
I hired a car in the States once and got seriously pissed off with the safety features. Get in the car, put the key in the ignition start it up and drive.
Not being told to put on safety belts, lock the doors, put your foot on the brake before you put it into drive.
Plus many other ones that i cannot remember.
Objects in the rearview mirror etc
(Call myself a meatloaf walt for that!)
 
I am a mechanic and was doing some work on a brand new Bentley once.
I was unfamaliar with the type as it was new.
I nearly ripped the gear selector off as I tried to move it, pushing it down and trying to shove it into gear.
After a while it dawned on me that if you gave it the lightest of touch, you pulled it up and it smoothly moved into position.
 
I am a mechanic and was doing some work on a brand new Bentley once.
I was unfamaliar with the type as it was new.
I nearly ripped the gear selector off as I tried to move it, pushing it down and trying to shove it into MY ARSE
After a while it dawned on me that if you gave it the lightest of touch, you pulled it up and it smoothly moved into position.
FOC
 

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