how bone is your missus.

A couple of cash ISAs are about to mature and I had to call the provider to make new arrangements.
Mine went OK and I asked the guy if I could sort my wife's as well as she hates doing that sort of stuff.
He wanted to speak to her for the security questions...... Oh dear! She turns on another phone.
Name, no problem. Address and postcode, no problem. Password 3rd & 4th character........ OK, Phew!
Security grid card. Fuckit!
"What is the number at A3?"
"Eh?" I point, she reads - she gets it right!
"What is the number at D2?"
She scans the card, looks blank, I point, she reads C2, I go "NOO! D2!"
"D2."
"Hold up, 4th column along, second down."
"Oh! 7, it's your fault, you've got fat fingers."

By this time the bloke at the other end is in fits, I told him 'We don't play Battleships, any idea why?'
 
Can someone tell me what the blinking flip my missus is doing in the bathroom.

A typical Monday night for us:
Circuit training 2000-2100, home, gym kit straight in washing machine, shower, soup & bread and relax in front of the box for a bit. Sounds easy.

Thefuckitis.

I'm in the shower by 2115 and out about 5 minutes after at which point the missus is still wandering around doing anything that doesn't need to be done still in her gym kit.

"Shall I leave the shower on, are you jumping straight in after me?"

"Yeah" she says still fully clothed disappearing downstairs.

I've been here before so off goes the shower.

2145 comes around & she's still in her gym kit faffing about with something else other than what needs doing, usually this task is done with her phone in her hand.

"Are you getting in the shower or are we having dinner at fcuking midnight?"

5 minutes later she's in the shower so I stick the soup on low.

2225 the soup is bubbling away to oblivion and she's still in the fecking bathroom.
It's taken her an hour and 10 minutes to come in & take a shower.
We do the soup as a quick and easy meal so we don't end up eating too late!

I despair I really do.
 
Can someone tell me what the blinking flip my missus is doing in the bathroom.

A typical Monday night for us:
Circuit training 2000-2100, home, gym kit straight in washing machine, shower, soup & bread and relax in front of the box for a bit. Sounds easy.

Thefuckitis.

I'm in the shower by 2115 and out about 5 minutes after at which point the missus is still wandering around doing anything that doesn't need to be done still in her gym kit.

"Shall I leave the shower on, are you jumping straight in after me?"

"Yeah" she says still fully clothed disappearing downstairs.

I've been here before so off goes the shower.

2145 comes around & she's still in her gym kit faffing about with something else other than what needs doing, usually this task is done with her phone in her hand.

"Are you getting in the shower or are we having dinner at fcuking midnight?"

5 minutes later she's in the shower so I stick the soup on low.

2225 the soup is bubbling away to oblivion and she's still in the fecking bathroom.
It's taken her an hour and 10 minutes to come in & take a shower.
We do the soup as a quick and easy meal so we don't end up eating too late!

I despair I really do.
I can't imagine what it's like post coitus.
 
You're not missing much, I just climb off, fart and find something to clean myself with before the rohypnol wears off.
That's what I like to hear, a couple with real chemistry
 
Our gas bill has gone down 20% since No.1 left home & went to uni.
Getting rid of No.2 (the female one) should being it down by another 25% at least
 
Our gas bill has gone down 20% since No.1 left home & went to uni.
Getting rid of No.2 (the female one) should being it down by another 25% at least
It's the biggest costs saving method known to man. When our two left we were suddenly very comfortable indeed. Food bills alone dropped by £50 a week. The taxi cars were very much cheaper to run and Fuel oil usage for heating dropped by a massive 33%. Other benefits include peace and quiet, a little unnerving at first, and internet access speed improvements.
 
Can someone tell me what the blinking flip my missus is doing in the bathroom.

A typical Monday night for us:
Circuit training 2000-2100, home, gym kit straight in washing machine, shower, soup & bread and relax in front of the box for a bit. Sounds easy.

Thefuckitis.

I'm in the shower by 2115 and out about 5 minutes after at which point the missus is still wandering around doing anything that doesn't need to be done still in her gym kit.

"Shall I leave the shower on, are you jumping straight in after me?"

"Yeah" she says still fully clothed disappearing downstairs.

I've been here before so off goes the shower.

2145 comes around & she's still in her gym kit faffing about with something else other than what needs doing, usually this task is done with her phone in her hand.

"Are you getting in the shower or are we having dinner at fcuking midnight?"

5 minutes later she's in the shower so I stick the soup on low.

2225 the soup is bubbling away to oblivion and she's still in the fecking bathroom.
It's taken her an hour and 10 minutes to come in & take a shower.
We do the soup as a quick and easy meal so we don't end up eating too late!

I despair I really do.
What sort of soup did you have?
 

Gout Man

LE
Book Reviewer
SWMBO came home from having her hair done and now I find I'm sharing my bed with a ginga or as she calls it a redhead
Oooo we have a thread already made for her.;)
 

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