how bone is your missus.

Indeed if we can't trust the postie then who can we trust. I am aware of the odd postie gone bad.
Good and bad in every sort, thankfully there seem to be more good posties than bad and the bad ones are usually caught pretty quickly.
One gripe I do have though is that the leaflets we deliver are classed as first class post by the company as they have been paid to be delivered, so when the news says a postie was caught with 5 thousand items of mail at home it's usually mostly leaflets and not parcels or birthday cards, though it will be the few parcels and cards they've nicked that gets them caught.
 
Or any flat surface
I'll take her a cup of coffee and then stand there holding it out of her reach until she makes some space on the table at the side of her. Every. Fucking. Time. And, no, I won't simply hand it to her :twisted:
 
Was sat watching Remembrance Ceremony on the TV with her indoors and it got to the bit where Charles and his brothers and a few more Army officers were laying wreaths. Cincnaghome says "Look they are wearing spurs, why haven't the Navy officers got them?" I just replied " Can't get horses on ships" "oh" she says and goes back to playing candy crush on her tablet I just sit there shaking my head. At least she's a good cook.
 
Why do women try to use the stairs as storage space?:-?
If we were to divorce I'm certain this would be one of the reasons, I cannot understand the motivation behind putting piles of objects at the top of the stairs leading to the basement, glossy magazines, balls of yarn and anything that would present a trip hazzard. The excuse from SWMBO is that she is piling it up to take down stairs all in one go regardless of the fact that no human would be capable of carrying all of it, let alone down a set of stairs.
Don't start on flat surfaces, the new kitchen completed a couple of months ago has three 9ft runs of clear work surface (as per her request) I now struggle to find a clear area to butter a crumpet, it is absolutley beyond my understanding. All future flat areas will have a 30% slope.
 
On the way to a follow-up appointment for a kidney stone I had a few weeks back. Stuck in heavy traffic a car is trying to pull out from the kerb.
Her: "He's pulling out, are you letting him?"
"Yes." He pulls out.
"Was he black?"
"No."
"Well, he's got black mans hair."
"That's the headrest."
Think this from the back


Then on the way home. The consultant said the ultrasound hadn't detected the stone that a few weeks back was 1/3 the way down from kidney to bellend and widening of the tubes above the last position means I've got to have another CT to see if it's still there, although I'm feeling fine. Therefore more faffing about.
Her: "I dunno, perhaps it would be better if they'd just found the stone on ultrasound."
"Then I'd have to go in and have a drainpipe and grapple shoved up my todger. If it's not there on the CT, I don't need it done. Cheers!"
"Oh! I know what I mean, sometimes it doesn't come out how I want it to."
"Sometimes it doesn't need to come out."
 
I'll take her a cup of coffee and then stand there holding it out of her reach until she makes some space on the table at the side of her. Every. *******. Time. And, no, I won't simply hand it to her :twisted:
Mine has a slight variation, I take the drink to her, she doesn't clear a space, I clear a space with the cup. Clutter crashes to the floor off the other side of the table.
Been doing the same for years, never gets the idea.
 

Auld-Yin

ADC
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
Reviews Editor
If we were to divorce I'm certain this would be one of the reasons, I cannot understand the motivation behind putting piles of objects at the top of the stairs leading to the basement, glossy magazines, balls of yarn and anything that would present a trip hazzard. The excuse from SWMBO is that she is piling it up to take down stairs all in one go regardless of the fact that no human would be capable of carrying all of it, let alone down a set of stairs.
Don't start on flat surfaces, the new kitchen completed a couple of months ago has three 9ft runs of clear work surface (as per her request) I now struggle to find a clear area to butter a crumpet, it is absolutley beyond my understanding. All future flat areas will have a 30% slope.
If you catch her looking at you as you walk past the pile of stuff with a copy of your life insurance policy in hand you will know you have a slight issue. :cool:
 

Similar threads


Latest Threads

Top