how bone is your missus.

We've been having the HOLIDAY DISCUSSION.
I don't like temperatures hotter than 25C and preferably 15C at night.

So far she has suggested Marbella 33/22C
Lanzarote 30/20C
Maldives 30/26C

Yes dear I say, please ensure that any hotel we stay at has air con in the bedroom.

Why? She says.
You are fast becoming a grumpy old Hector. May all your hotels have nothing on the menu save sausages and baked potato.

OZ
 
Doris has appeared on here on numerous occasions , but for once she is here for a very sharp observation she made on the way home last night

new pub in Kirkcaldy
,
27545323_2023063227942176_6978885909753561158_n.png



she instantly asked , " Is that the local NAZI pub?"
 
Doris has appeared on here on numerous occasions , but for once she is here for a very sharp observation she made on the way home last night

new pub in Kirkcaldy
, View attachment 346297


she instantly asked , " Is that the local NAZI pub?"
Just as long as she doesn't try and deny the alcoholocaust.
 
I was watching the launch of the NASA Parker Polar Probe with the current mrs_mush flicking through the papers beside me. I thought I'd try the old "Why don't they go at night when the sun's in" gag.

"I'm not falling for that old one. you must think I'm daft" says she.
"No flies on you", says I, "Mind you I can see why they're launching it now"
"Why's that?"
"Because it'll be winter when it get's there, a bit cooler"
"Hmmm, yes that makes sense", and with that she turned back to the papers as I stuffed my fist in my mouth to stop myself cracking up.
 
My youngest son, a few years ago, had an offer to play for Fife Flyers, we went to see what it was like there. There are not enough adjectives to describe how ugly the women are or how much of a shithole it is. Suffice it to say, no wonder their MP was Gordon Brown.
 
My youngest son, a few years ago, had an offer to play for Fife Flyers, we went to see what it was like there. There are not enough adjectives to describe how ugly the women are or how much of a shithole it is. Suffice it to say, no wonder their MP was Gordon Brown.
In that case, thank your lucky stars that you did not stray to Lochgelly.
On a positive note, Kirkcaldy has (or had) Jackie O's ;)
 
In that case, thank your lucky stars that you did not stray to Lochgelly.
On a positive note, Kirkcaldy has (or had) Jackie O's ;)
you haven't been there for quite a while have you
Jackie O shut down , probably 20 years ago
 
I make it a matter of principle to go there as little as possible. I didn’t think it was as much as 20 years, though.
they changed the name to mcsqintys,? And the candle rooms, which eventually closed in 2010
But if you want a name from the past , I give you.The Raith Ballroom.... God there's a rough place for a young innocent lad
 
they changed the name to mcsqintys,? And the candle rooms, which eventually closed in 2010
But if you want a name from the past , I give you.The Raith Ballroom.... God there's a rough place for a young innocent lad
*shudders*
I've only ever heard the stories.
 
Not a stupid comment but I still am left speechless at times.........
Mrs has a business that entails regular delivery's to our house by a supplier at 06.30 , she places the orders so she knows when they are due . We live in the middle of nowhere with a large totally private garden approached by a long drive with electric gate (this is relevant ).

I came back from walking the dog the other morning as delivery van drove down the drive ....helped him unload in the light drizzle and off he went .

Walked back into the house and no sign on Mrs G , not in bed , not in shower (normal at that time ) .
Mrs G then walks into the house looking a bit like a drowned rat wearing nothing but her bra and knickers and is swearing loudly .

Seemingly it is my fault that she nipped outside to put some rubbish in the dustbin forgetting that she had a delivery due..........it is also my fault that she spent 15 mins hiding behind the dustbins while I chatted to the delivery driver after unloading van while she got cold and wet .
 
In that case, thank your lucky stars that you did not stray to Lochgelly.
On a positive note, Kirkcaldy has (or had) Jackie O's ;)
In the late 80s a girl in Lochgelly asked me if I was a boy or a lassie, because I had an earring and she had never seen a boy with an earring before.
 
In the late 80s a girl in Lochgelly asked me if I was a boy or a lassie, because I had an earring and she had never seen a boy with an earring before.
I had an uncle_mush, not much older than me and now sadly passed away, but I remember in the early 70s' as a teenager he came home one day with an earring. Grandad_mush took one look at it and said "The only men who wear earrings are poofs or pirates, and I don't see any ships on the street"

It removed and not seen again for a good few years
 

Cutaway

LE
Kit Reviewer
In the late 80s a girl in Lochgelly asked me if I was a boy or a lassie, because I had an earring and she had never seen a boy with an earring before.
Did you know the answer ?
 
Worked with a guy and every morning he came in the chorus stared

You come fae Lochgelly,
yir awfi awfi smelly
And yi cannae afford a telly

His reply every morning

gettafuckyabastards
 
Worked with a guy and every morning he came in the chorus stared

You come fae Lochgelly,
yir awfi awfi smelly
And yi cannae afford a telly

His reply every morning

gettafuckyabastards
Wasn't that the chant of East Fife

they live beside Lochgelly
They havnae got a telly
they're dirty and they're smelly
the Cowden family

sung to the tune for the Adams Family
 

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