how bone is your missus.

[721CXT]

In the early days of my relationship with my future wife I initially made the mistake of taking notice of her road skills.

While I was driving, waiting to pull out at a junction she would say "It's clear on the left".
My mistake was listening to her and not actually looking as once I was half way across the junction she would add "If you're quick".
I hasten to add that this mistake was only made a few times before I learnt the error of my ways.
I suppose it could be said that I was the bone one for taking notice.

Not the wife, but.. When we were at college, one of my friends had an Escort Mexico. He'd often ask me if it was clear my side and every now and again I'd add an unnecessary "If you're quick" for a laugh, just to get him to screech out.
The same friend also had a Beetle and one day took his Mum to a nearby town to drop her off to shop. I was in the back.
He braked quite sedately for a zebra crossing and I added a realistic oral tyre screech (I can get people to jump spectacularly by doing it when they're crossing the road).
His mum went apeshit at him, which caused him to call me a cunt, at which point his mum went apeshit again and I got an over the seat dead-leg.
Oh to be young.

 

[NSP]

In that case do not try being a rally driver.

Somewhat different scenario to pulling out onto the public roadway, I feel.

 

[ExREME..TECH]

In the early days of my relationship with my future wife I initially made the mistake of taking notice of her road skills.

While I was driving, waiting to pull out at a junction she would say "It's clear on the left".
My mistake was listening to her and not actually looking as once I was half way across the junction she would add "If you're quick".
I hasten to add that this mistake was only made a few times before I learnt the error of my ways.
I suppose it could be said that I was the bone one for taking notice.

I'm impressed. Your wife knows left from right

 

[ancienturion]

Somewhat different scenario to pulling out onto the public roadway, I feel.

Motor sports association provides all the details and regulations for road rallying, all of which were upgraded back in 1988 in order to somewhat mollify the police. Many rallyists start with road rallying before progressing to stage rallies.

 

[Civvy Scum]

Just picked her up from work and come home. There's a letter waiting for her, which she reads and then puts down on top of her Kindle. She then immediately asks, "Have you seen my Kindle". At which point I look across at her and the table next to her with the Kindle and the letter on top of it and simply say, "Yes".

Situational awareness?

 

[Robbo_72]

Ex missus......

Ex: "Im going to look at a new car"

Me: "Oh yeah, I didn't know you were looking"

Ex: "I just seen this one and it LOOKS excellent"

Me: "This is the only one? Make sure you check xyz and shop around"

Ex: "yeah blah blah, i know what I am doing, blah blah Its been MoT'd bla bla, you sexist, etc"

Two days later, taking our son to parent-teacher night

Me: "ahh I see you have a new car"

Ex: "I'll drive us all down to the school"

Me: "Whats that noise?"

Ex: "Not sure its been doing it all day"

Must add, While we were talking to the teacher she said my son was top of the top set and "exceeding", I'm knocked back a bit and then the ex chirps in "He definitely has your brains"

Stange old world.

 

[Kirkz]

Ex missus......

Ex: "Im going to look at a new car"

Me: "Oh yeah, I didn't know you were looking"

Ex: "I just seen this one and it LOOKS excellent"

Me: "This is the only one? Make sure you check xyz and shop around"

Ex: "yeah blah blah, i know what I am doing, blah blah Its been MoT'd bla bla, you sexist, etc"

Two days later, taking our son to parent-teacher night

Me: "ahh I see you have a new car"

Ex: "I'll drive us all down to the school"

Me: "Whats that noise?"

Ex: "Not sure its been doing it all day"

Must add, While we were talking to the teacher she said my son was top of the top set and "exceeding", I'm knocked back a bit and then the ex chirps in "He definitely has your brains"

Stange old world.

What was the noise then?

 

[Civvy Scum]

What was the noise then?

She's the ex, why should he care?

 

[beefer]

What was the noise then?

It was his marriage collapsing.

 

[SONAR-BENDER]

Or Limmy's show.

Nope, sorry.Just not hitting the spot! Only 25 minutes until Still Game though!!

 

[Kirkz]

She's the ex, why should he care?

I was just wondering how expensive it was going to be to be put right.

 

[Robbo_72]

I was just wondering how expensive it was going to be to be put right.

Not my problem.
Old habits still active I suppose by attempting to pass on some advice before she splashed.
Her new habit is very much the independent woman thing, Fair enough I suppose.

Sounded like power steering whine (kicks in while turning), could do with a bleed possibly, It's an Astra so any work should be cheap enough for her, even if it's a pump job.
Of course, I know fuck all so she can go and pay for a diagnosis since it might be detrimental to my well being to pass her a courteous "told you so".

We have not been apart long enough for me to acquire the art of silent nodding a.k.a faux approval

 

[NSP]

Motor sports association provides all the details and regulations for road rallying, all of which were upgraded back in 1988 in order to somewhat mollify the police. Many rallyists start with road rallying before progressing to stage rallies.

I suspect that the roads they rally on are closed to other traffic at the time. Still apples and oranges...

 

[Kirkz]

Not my problem.
Old habits still active I suppose by attempting to pass on some advice before she splashed.
Her new habit is very much the independent woman thing, Fair enough I suppose.

Sounded like power steering whine (kicks in while turning), could do with a bleed possibly, It's an Astra so any work should be cheap enough for her, even if it's a pump job.
Of course, I know **** all so she can go and pay for a diagnosis since it might be detrimental to my well being to pass her a courteous "told you so".

We have not been apart long enough for me to acquire the art of silent nodding a.k.a faux approval

I was hoping for something more terminal like a big end knocking.

 

[wheelchairwarrier]

I was hoping for something more terminal like a big end knocking.

Or Knocking her big end !

 

[kiwidoug]

Just bought a replacement microwave.
I unpacked, set it up and spent 5 minutes reading the instructions.
Pretty straightforward, apart from the occasional Chinglish phrase (Inquiring Function)
Me: Seems straightforward my Love, all you have . . .
SWMBO: Don't bother me now, I'll try it and work it out from the buttons.
Me: Sure, my Sweetheart . . . Runs for fire extinguisher to place nearby.

 

[CaptainRidiculous]

MrsRid excelled tonight.
Decides that omelettes and toast was a good idea.
So she shoves the bread in the toaster, and the eggs into a jug.
Gets the electric whisking thing out, and plugs it in.
Unfortunately, the wire for the whisk goes over the top of the toaster.

 

[ExREME..TECH]

MrsRid excelled tonight.
Decides that omelettes and toast was a good idea.
So she shoves the bread in the toaster, and the eggs into a jug.
Gets the electric whisking thing out, and plugs it in.
Unfortunately, the wire for the whisk goes over the top of the toaster.

Women and cooking /ironing don't go

 

[CaptainRidiculous]

Women and cooking /ironing don't go

Later, I'm going to have to find one of those bizarre torxx bits to open the fecker up and put on a new cord.
Oh, and scrape the gunk off the toaster.
Otherwise it'll be 'your fault'.

 

[ExREME..TECH]

Later, I'm going to have to find one of those bizarre torxx bits to open the fecker up and put on a new cord.
Oh, and scrape the gunk off the toaster.
Otherwise it'll be 'your fault'.

Send it here and I will fuck it up for you... I mean try to fix it