How bone are your kids?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by B_AND_T, Feb 14, 2009.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. B_AND_T

    B_AND_T LE Book Reviewer

    Just sat with wifey and kids, enjoying a post swim drink.

    Son pipes up (fucking random I know)

    "Dad"
    "What"
    "Dad, Have you ever had chocolate, chlli and Coca Beans together?"
    "What do you think chocolate is made of"
    "uuummmmm"
    "TWAT"
    "Your always picking on me"
    "Grow a set"
    "Fine, I will"
    "Can I have a Euro"
    "Why"
    "Cus I can"


    Christ I wish I had understood what birth control was.
     
  2. "Post swim drink"? Not another bottle of voddy......
     
  3. B_AND_T

    B_AND_T LE Book Reviewer

    Not yet, but heading that way!
     
  4. Thats verbal abuse. You should have your kids taken from you and placed with a nice pakistani family who will nurture their individuality
     
  5. B_AND_T

    B_AND_T LE Book Reviewer

    Only if they are gay:
     
  6. My little darlings are trying to set up Mousetrap. Its a fcuking nightmare, and they keep bothering me to help.

    DO NOT buy this game for your kids.
     
  7. B&T u nasty pasty! The child has seen it somwhere, I think it might be M&S that do chilli and cocoa bean chocolate and the other day someone on the telly was making their own version, its got bits of cocoa bean in it.
     
  8. Have Walkers not just brought out chilli and chocolate flavoured crisps?
     
  9. Dont know about bone, but,

    Out sledging wth my boy dand he decided to have a crack at the biggest, steepest hill, in the local area.
    Hes nearly four, and most kids dont try it until they are at least 7-8.

    Mrs Skjold ripped me a new one :x , and although I had to take the boy in for his own safety. I am proud as punch for him, because, as I informed Mrs Skjold.
    "I refuse to wrap him cotton wool, and I WOULD OF DONE THE SAME THING".
    SK
     
  10. Well, this is how bone I was as a kid. My must asked me to go close the front door before a draught got in. She found me two minutes later slowly edging towards the door, terrified of the giraffe who was trying to get into the house any second. I still remember the fear :oops:

    edited for shite spelling
     
  11. Yes, they are fcuking disgusting.
     
  12. Could be worse,he could have just fathered a child.
     
  13. My ex had a large reptile collection. Mainly large boas and pythons. To provide them with wholesome food required keeping around 400 breeding rats as comfortably as possible in the shed. Consequently much sawdust was used. This arrived from the pet shop in huge packs. As a young kiddie, my daughter was used to sawdust.

    When she was around 9 or 10 years of age, I got the tree surgeon round to remove a tree for me.

    She came home from school and asked, "Why has the man put sawdust all over the garden?"
     
  14. we were out near charleville , staying with the kids for a few days, my nearly 4 year old grandson came in crying , said god had made a big Bumburp and the sky had started Leaking :p it was the first time he had ever seen rain :) look what happened to his sister
     

    Attached Files:

  15. seaweed

    seaweed LE Book Reviewer

    Small cousin of mine aged about 3 (this is way over half a century ago), puts his hand down the back of his shorts, 'There's a hole in my bottom!!!!'