How bone are you?

Discussion in 'The ARRSE Hole' started by Social_Handgrenade, Oct 27, 2006.

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  1. Following on from the 'how bone is your missus' thread...

    Whats the stupidist thing you've ever said (and don't say "I do", that crops up all the time and stopped being funny a while ago :p ) mod edit - topic has been done to death as well

    I'll start the ball rolling by admitting the following:

    Upon arrival in the Balkans, having just received my opperational ammo, I turned to my section commander and asked
    "Are these tracers still gonna work then?"
    "Err, probably, why do you ask?"
    "Well most of the paint's come off mine" :oops: Cue six months of sarcy comments.

    Now this could go one of two ways. Either some outstanding examples of stupidity, or I'm setting myself up to have the sh-it ripped outta me. Ho hum lets see...
  2. I think you are right, you have left your self open to a good old Piss ripping.

    but to make you feel a little bit better I did do the following.

    When I was in N. Ierland in the 90's having been on duty for over 24 hours I was in my room getting my fat head down. my room mate decided to put the duty phone next to my bed. After a couple of hours the phone starts to ring and me being half asleep picked it up and started shouting down the phone telling the person to fcuk off wanker I am trying to get my head down, I then put the phone down and went back to sleep. About two hours passed the next thing I now is my SSM tipping my bed and starts kicking me all he said to me was "NOW CALL ME A WANKER TO MY FACE AND TELL ME TO FCUK OFF WILL YOU" in a really loud voice. Funny old thing for the rest of the tour every time the SSM would see me he would get his Pacestick and jab me with it for good mesure. It was the longest tour I ever did.
  3. terroratthepicnic

    terroratthepicnic LE Reviewer Book Reviewer
    1. ARRSE Runners

    Last week me and the bird went to fally to visit her sister. Driving down the road from the airport i see a sign saying ausfarht, didn't think anything of it and carried on monging out the window. A few minutes later i see the sign again, and i start thinking that it must be some town i never heard of. Anyway, it was only after seeing the sign another 3 times and thinking Fcuk me thats a huge town, did i realise that it ment 'exit'. The stupid thing is i was a pad brat who spent most of my early childhood in Germany and i studied German at school at GCSE level, i think i may have been monging a bit to much.
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