Hours of fun!

#21
TheWarden said:
Lord...........Its a load of bowlocks............They don't stick properly and they took ages to warm up after taking them out of the freezer. Then when I got bored with the lack of thrust I just played crash and burn with the match head as the point of impact. The heat warmed up the glue, the flies happily pi$$ed off and I was left with a burning pair of thin sticks and no cooked meat. Mind you It did burn a wing off one of them and I took great delight in seeing it spin itself to death.

Thanks for nuthin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You should apply for the chief designers job at Westland.

Youre probably over qualified though. :)



It does work, trust me.

You just need to get a few key things right.

1. Correct propulsion. This time of year doesn't produce very good flies unfortunately. Better off to wait til the summer and place some dog shit outside the back door. You will then have uber flies.

2. Cooling the propulsion. Dont put them in the freezer. It will kill them. Better off to put them in the fridge. Even better would be to place the dog shite with flies on in fridge. If you place them towards the back, its usually the coldest part but not too cold to actually kill them. 20-30 minutes. If some of the flies have stuck to the dog shite, just chip them out of it carefully usuing a tiny Action Man ice pick.

3. Positioning the propulsion. Once the flies are out cold (literally), take them out of the fridge. You need to work fairly quickly positioning them on your pre made fuselage otherwise they'll just wake up and fuck off; all be it, a bit confused. The best adhesive I have found is super glue. Its light, strong and quick to dry. Make sure the surface you are going to attach them to isn't too pourous. If need be, drill tiny little holes to place the legs of the flies in.

4. Ground running. As with any new aircraft, you'll need to ground run it.
Bringing them out to room temperature usually wakes them up but they'll still be a bit groggy. Ensure they are all positioned in the same direction otherwise you'll get a hell of a vibe once they all start flapping. Once they are all positioned and up and running, blow on them. This will get them up to flight idle temp.

Don't let them go yet! You'll need to ground run them for a minute or two. It helps them to synch thier wings and get used to being glued to a small match.





Next week - Flying a tethered Bumble Bee in three easy steps.
 
#22
Best thread on arrse for weeks :D
 
#24
As there is currently a seasonally-induced lack of suitable propulsion I think that this is the time to be thinking about possible design improvements before serious testing begins. Flash has comprehensively pointed out the avoidable hiccups so my thoughts are turning to things which will give a better return for the time I will be investing in this. Main headings are:

Flying controls. Necessary to improve flight duration because without them we are just leaving elevation and heading up to the flies. Flies are not known particularly for teamwork so perhaps wasps would be the better option here. I'm thinking about attaching a single 'engine' to one side of the tailplane to act as a vertical aileron. This would enable circles to be flown which in turn would increase flight duration but I'm a little worried about the negative effects of having an insect flying in that attitude for prolonged periods.

Some kind of airport. This would need to be stocked with sweets for energy and a piece of sh#te and/or flowers for the female engines to unload unnecessary ballast (eggs).

That's the extent of my research at the moment. Is there anything else we need to consider?
 
#25
Stained_Eligius said:
As there is currently a seasonally-induced lack of suitable propulsion I think that this is the time to be thinking about possible design improvements before serious testing begins. Flash has comprehensively pointed out the avoidable hiccups so my thoughts are turning to things which will give a better return for the time I will be investing in this. Main headings are:

Flying controls. Necessary to improve flight duration because without them we are just leaving elevation and heading up to the flies. Flies are not known particularly for teamwork so perhaps wasps would be the better option here. I'm thinking about attaching a single 'engine' to one side of the tailplane to act as a vertical aileron. This would enable circles to be flown which in turn would increase flight duration but I'm a little worried about the negative effects of having an insect flying in that attitude for prolonged periods.

Some kind of airport. This would need to be stocked with sweets for energy and a piece of sh#te and/or flowers for the female engines to unload unnecessary ballast (eggs).

That's the extent of my research at the moment. Is there anything else we need to consider?

Some very good ideas there, Stained.

You could train 1x Wasp or fly seperatly. You'll need some sort of selection process so you find the better insect with the required skill. Get him up to solo standard and the others will follow his lead. He could be your 'test pilot'.

I think the airport idea is very good. It gives the insects an incentive and direction to fly to.


I'm going to chat to QinetiQ and the chaps at Boscombe to see if I can borrow their wind tunnel to do some further testing. I'm going to try out a swept wing version. My thoughts are that if the insects can see one of their mates in front of them, it gives them an incentive and something to follow. Obviously, the test 'pilot' will be at the front showing the ab-initios what to do.


I've even fashioned a tiny log book for them;




Just trying to get them to claim for aircrew rations now.
 
#26
What about going even bigger and get four 2nd Lt's , two on each wing. They flap a lot and will more than likely go around in circles, but with a little bit of coaching could go far.

Plus side you can get them out the office and from under your feet and be able to nail them without getting into trouble (especially the females).


ok back into the straight jacket and eat a few moe of those pretty coloured pills. :roll:
 
#29
Round our way a month ago we had a load of dragon flies.

Might need something bigger to make the body out of but I reckon it just might work.

I'll have forgotten all about this in a month so can somebody please remind me.

Just write to
Bobath
C/O the Wasp Factory.

It'll get there.
 
#30
You see the problems you get when you let a test-pilot get board. Please someone, give him some work.

On the other hand, would geese be the best for the D-wing version; pre-trained propulsion and at this time of year, if you know where they started, you will know the direction of travel?
 
#31
What if you stick a spider on the tail, then when the flies warm up and look behind......instant after burner!
 

Attachments

#33
just tried four buzzards on a cricket bat and piece of 4X2 (bat as fuselage of course) and it was a little too successful, just rang sally traffic to ask people in the Falkirk area to watch the skies around the M9-A876 Jcn.

(gutted-it was an SS Jumbo too)
 
#34
Why not glue a similar configuration of power plants under the wing on the same axis?, power/weight ratio might be an issue, but would prevent assymetric thrust problems in case of a fly failure, which could be catastrophic due to the absence of a ruddder. By applying grease to the backs of the lower tier, you also have a rudimentary landing gear, or could glue two dedicated flies onto the undersurface by their wings, and do the job properly (screen for fast runners).

A piece of sh1t impregnated string is being tested with a view to developing an inflight refuelling capability, progress is hampered as flies do not understand the concept of 'wait your turn'.

Strategically placed closed windows could be deployed as a nav system similar to Loran, as any fly can find a closed window, yet automatically disregard open windows.
 

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