Army Rumour Service

This is a sample guest message. Register a free account today to become a member! Once signed in, you'll be able to participate on this site by adding your own topics and posts, as well as connect with other members through your own private inbox!

HMS Queen Elizabeth's captain sacked - for using his official car at weekends

Apart from the fact that Southern Rail and London generally were not as nice as now
I did a lot of duty travel on Southern at the turn of this century, and as Field rank was entitled to ride 1st class. I gave it up after a couple of times, when I realized it was costing the taxpayer £20 more for me to have a paper antimacassar on my headrest and access to tea that tasted like lukewarm boiled socks.

Musta been fvcking grim in your day
 

ugly

LE
Moderator
I did a lot of duty travel on Southern at the turn of this century, and as Field rank was entitled to ride 1st class. I gave it up after a couple of times, when I realized it was costing the taxpayer £20 more for me to have a paper antimacassar on my headrest and access to tea that tasted like lukewarm boiled socks.

Musta been fvcking grim in your day
The tea has stopped now
 

Cromarty

Old-Salt
Way back in the 1970s I was issued with a travel warrant for my leave in the North West.
In those days the warrants had a First Class/Second Class section which had to have a pen strikethrough on the First Class bit with me being a filthy f*ck all Gunner.
Sadly our BSM forgot to strike through the First Class bit so I did it for him.
Unfortunately my pen slipped and I did the strike through on the Second Class bit.
Sadly this only happened about 5 times and I was never pulled up about it.
Another way to travel First Class was to book a meal in the dining restaurant and stay there for the entire journey which was way cheaper than upgrading to First Class and the food was surprisingly good.

While on my first leave i got recalled to the ship, but instead of going back to WA i was to meet the ship in Sydney. It costs a lot less to fly from Melbourne to Sydney than it does from Melbourne to Perth. I got the refund.
 

Sexton Blake

War Hero
I did a lot of duty travel on Southern at the turn of this century, and as Field rank was entitled to ride 1st class. I gave it up after a couple of times, when I realized it was costing the taxpayer £20 more for me to have a paper antimacassar on my headrest and access to tea that tasted like lukewarm boiled socks.

Musta been fvcking grim in your day

Just as I was promoted to Major around 2010 they then changed the rules on first class travel and that particular benefit of being an ‘hofficer’ was cruelly ripped away from my tiny, grabbing hands.

However, vengeance was still mine.

As I sat in the flea bitten 2nd class shunter, rattling my way to Kings Cross and onto MB, there was I, smug and with a wry smile on my face. Secure in the knowledge and able to reflect on all those 1st class train journeys I had taken as Pte SB during the heady days of the 80’s.

Yes, that’ll teach em. The bloody MOD bean counters. And I effing double dare the RMP or SIB to even try to get me to pay it all back now.

Oh yes, I would fight it in the highest courts in the land. I still recall those cheese toasties that........hang about, time for my LE nap I think.

Goodnight.

SB
 
Last edited:

ugly

LE
Moderator
The rear 1st class on Thameslink stock is permanently declassified to standard class and the antimacassers have gone but live on with Southern
 
I was there when she decided that the Guardsmen must have no pictures of naked women on or in their lockers. There were rumblings. But being Guards, they did what they were jolly well told to do.
Were you there when a roller and fingerprint ink was purchased to erase Page 3 from all copies of The Sun that were delivered?
 
Were you there when a roller and fingerprint ink was purchased to erase Page 3 from all copies of The Sun that were delivered?
Don't remember that - I was in the Portakabin next to the Bde HQ, not, thankfully in the bn. One of the Bde Int Sect clerks - tiny and ginger, but with enormous assets and a bubbly personality - managed to infect most of one of the CG companies with an unfortunate ailment; she was a lively lass, indeed.
 

overopensights

ADC
Book Reviewer
Ahh, the good old days . . . . .

They'd still be with us, were it not for Maggie's moratorium in the early 1980s, IMHO.

I'm 110% certain most of my COs up to 1991 would have loved the opportunity, at the taxpayer's expense, to unleash their wive's inner Lady Of The Manor on us underlings of the yeoman and serf classes . . . . . ^~
I never perceived you 'stonker' to be of the Serf or Yeoman class, I always thought of you as one of those types who wear Red cords almost washed pink, and speaks rather loud and posh in the pub?
 

overopensights

ADC
Book Reviewer
When Margaret Thatcher decided to come to NI all planning was going well, until it became known from HQNI that she wished to visit a soldiers billet. The question of which billet and what Company, Margaret Thatcher was not one to be led by the nose. So all Billets had to be sorted. There was a big argument from the OC's of Companies when orders came out to remove pinups. 'Let her see how soldiers live' was the argument and rightly so. However finally the CO gave in and made a temporary pinup rule. 'No genitals to be visible on pics, and pics to contain only one person and without implement. In the end I think she entered a Green Jacket Billet. She stood for a moment and studied the various pinups, then remarked; "It seems one needs a pair of shears to enter a modern soldier's billet"
 
I never perceived you 'stonker' to be of the Serf or Yeoman class, I always thought of you as one of those types who wear Red cords almost washed pink, and speaks rather loud and posh in the pub?
I have good friends who resemble that description, but I'm confident I've never managed in 65 years to completely expunge my dodgy suburban vowels.

Don't let the vocabulary fool you :thumleft:

ETA: @overopensights - it occurred to me over the weekend to add this:

In person I'm pretty sure I sound more Elton John than Eton College​
 
Last edited:
When Margaret Thatcher decided to come to NI all planning was going well, until it became known from HQNI that she wished to visit a soldiers billet. The question of which billet and what Company, Margaret Thatcher was not one to be led by the nose. So all Billets had to be sorted. There was a big argument from the OC's of Companies when orders came out to remove pinups. 'Let her see how soldiers live' was the argument and rightly so. However finally the CO gave in and made a temporary pinup rule. 'No genitals to be visible on pics, and pics to contain only one person and without implement. In the end I think she entered a Green Jacket Billet. She stood for a moment and studied the various pinups, then remarked; "It seems one needs a pair of shears to enter a modern soldier's billet"
There was a Parachute battalion from 1st Airborne Division stationed at Grantham before Arnhem, so who knows? That might not have been the first time Maggie entered a soldiers billet.
 
Was that issued on commissioning?
I aquired most of my English vocabulary by voracious reading before I left skule.

Since commmissioning I've become pretty sure that an extensive English vocabulary is cause for suspicion in the orrsifer's messes of most infantry mobs.

A smattering of Greek might still go down well in some of the more expensive capbadges, but my skule wasn't pricey enough, and my Latin master (a role model for the Centurion in Life of Brian) died of leukemia when I was in First Form, and I seek no forgiveness for being glad for the departure of the bullying little shoite.

Most of the Anglo-Saxon came later (Cadets/TA/Regulars), and later still the odd fragment of craic.

The getting of that vocabulary was a whole lot more fun :thumleft:
 

GDog

Old-Salt
I aquired most of my English vocabulary by voracious reading before I left skule.

Since commmissioning I've become pretty sure that an extensive English vocabulary is cause for suspicion in the orrsifer's messes of most infantry mobs.

A smattering of Greek might still go down well in some of the more expensive capbadges, but my skule wasn't pricey enough, and my Latin master (a role model for the Centurion in Life of Brian) died of leukemia when I was in First Form, and I seek no forgiveness for being glad for the departure of the bullying little shoite.

Most of the Anglo-Saxon came later (Cadets/TA/Regulars), and later still the odd fragment of craic.

The getting of that vocabulary was a whole lot more fun :thumleft:

 

overopensights

ADC
Book Reviewer
I aquired most of my English vocabulary by voracious reading before I left skule.

Since commmissioning I've become pretty sure that an extensive English vocabulary is cause for suspicion in the orrsifer's messes of most infantry mobs.

A smattering of Greek might still go down well in some of the more expensive capbadges, but my skule wasn't pricey enough, and my Latin master (a role model for the Centurion in Life of Brian) died of leukemia when I was in First Form, and I seek no forgiveness for being glad for the departure of the bullying little shoite.

Most of the Anglo-Saxon came later (Cadets/TA/Regulars), and later still the odd fragment of craic.

The getting of that vocabulary was a whole lot more fun :thumleft:
I once listened to an old BBC crackly sound recording of Sassoon and Robert Graves in conversation, both were classical scholars in Greek etc. The recording was 1922/3 era. Talk about posh, it is a wonder the Tommy's could understand them. You could actually hear the G in the word strength and the H in the word white.
 
Last edited:

Grownup_Rafbrat

LE
Book Reviewer
My wife was known as Wife of, and that seriously pissed her off!
On admission to BMH Wegberg in 1973 my name was D/O Chief Tech C....
 
I wonder whether Captain Edward V. Kinross RN ever had a problem with transport.

In Which We Serve screen capture.jpg


 
Last edited:

Latest Threads

Top