Hetrosexual Gayness

#4
Gay as a daisy. You're one step away from cramming man meat up your hoop. Kill yourself.
 
#5
You sound like you have been compensating for being in the closet your whole life.

Accept it, embrace it, shout it from the roof tops you like chugging cock and your back "veeting" girlfriend is called derek

Even if there is the faintest chance you actually like fucking women your faux rockstar/teenage behaviour is woefully sad and laughably to all but the most retarded of women

I bet you do those metal devils horns hand signals and try to high-five young people

You come from the midlands and see yourself as a "Fun guy" don't you?

Kill yourself immediately
 
#7
I can totally relate, Mog. I'm partial to the odd meaty treat and the feeling of a prolapsed rectum... Oh, and I moisturise after showering.


Sent from my iPhone using ARRSE app with my weiner fingers.
 
#9
Now I class meself as a real bloke - ride a 1600cc motorbike, do shedloads of x/c mountain biking, at 49 years young I am still moshing and slamming me head into huge speakers at my local rock/bikers pub as the live bands play very, VERY loud Sabbath/Maiden/Dio/Motorhead/AC/DC etc, done a few tours, drink beer not lager, wear proper Wrangler straight leg jeans with piss/beer stained trainers and black T-shirts. ( never in a million years would I wear fcuking shoes with jeans ), hate tucking in C95/wearing of belts over smocks, do not say partner or say other leftie phrases blah blah

However, every now and again I like to scrub me feet with one of those ped egg things-a small gauge cheesgrater ( you'd be surprised at how much dead skin comes off ) and then put some of me birds body butter on them-it makes me want to prance around the lounge on me tippytoes waving my arms about in a Peter out of Family Guy type way.

Anyone else have similar things we shouldn't really share.

I for one refuse to buy me mate his beer as he drinks lager tops

I accept I might get some shite for this but hey ho ( me bird also immacs/veets me back every few months-daren't get waxed )

You are queer as a nine bob note.

Suggest you start pm`ing Jarrod for advice and help on how to be a good queer.

Is your birds name Cecil?
 
#10
Now I class meself as a real bloke - ride a 1600cc motorbike, do shedloads of x/c mountain biking, at 49 years young I am still moshing and slamming me head into huge speakers at my local rock/bikers pub as the live bands play very, VERY loud Sabbath/Maiden/Dio/Motorhead/AC/DC etc, done a few tours, drink beer not lager, wear proper Wrangler straight leg jeans with piss/beer stained trainers and black T-shirts. ( never in a million years would I wear fcuking shoes with jeans ), hate tucking in C95/wearing of belts over smocks, do not say partner or say other leftie phrases blah blah

However, every now and again I like to scrub me feet with one of those ped egg things-a small gauge cheesgrater ( you'd be surprised at how much dead skin comes off ) and then put some of me birds body butter on them-it makes me want to prance around the lounge on me tippytoes waving my arms about in a Peter out of Family Guy type way.

Anyone else have similar things we shouldn't really share.

I for one refuse to buy me mate his beer as he drinks lager tops

I accept I might get some shite for this but hey ho ( me bird also immacs/veets me back every few months-daren't get waxed )
So much over compensation can mean only one thing, you are gayer than a gay thing! You'll never settle down and find the inner you until you've had your back doors kicked right off the hinges!

Cue Jarrod!
 
#11
Now I class meself as a real bloke - ride a 1600cc motorbike, do shedloads of x/c mountain biking, at 49 years young I am still moshing and slamming me head into huge speakers at my local rock/bikers pub as the live bands play very, VERY loud Sabbath/Maiden/Dio/Motorhead/AC/DC etc, done a few tours, drink beer not lager, wear proper Wrangler straight leg jeans with piss/beer stained trainers and black T-shirts. ( never in a million years would I wear fcuking shoes with jeans ), hate tucking in C95/wearing of belts over smocks, do not say partner or say other leftie phrases blah blah

However, every now and again I like to scrub me feet with one of those ped egg things-a small gauge cheesgrater ( you'd be surprised at how much dead skin comes off ) and then put some of me birds body butter on them-it makes me want to prance around the lounge on me tippytoes waving my arms about in a Peter out of Family Guy type way.



Anyone else have similar things we shouldn't really share.

I for one refuse to buy me mate his beer as he drinks lager tops

I accept I might get some shite for this but hey ho ( me bird also immacs/veets me back every few months-daren't get waxed )
Man up FFS !! You will be going for a back, sack and crack next !! let the klinkers alone, Put me right of my breakfast.
 
#12
You can always mix the bikes and rock music with the gay thing - just listen to this band and you've covered all the bases



Rodney2q
 
#13
/images/misc/quote_icon.png Originally Posted by moggly /images/buttons/viewpost-right.png
Now I class meself as a real bloke - ride a 1600cc motorbike, do shedloads of x/c mountain biking, at 49 years young I am still moshing and slamming me head into huge speakers at my local rock/bikers pub as the live bands play very, VERY loud Sabbath/Maiden/Dio/Motorhead/AC/DC etc, done a few tours, drink beer not lager, wear proper Wrangler straight leg jeans with piss/beer stained trainers and black T-shirts. ( never in a million years would I wear fcuking shoes with jeans ), hate tucking in C95/wearing of belts over smocks, do not say partner or say other leftie phrases blah blah

However, every now and again I like to scrub me feet with one of those ped egg things-a small gauge cheesgrater ( you'd be surprised at how much dead skin comes off ) and then put some of me birds body butter on them-it makes me want to prance around the lounge on me tippytoes waving my arms about in a Peter out of Family Guy type way.



Anyone else have similar things we shouldn't really share.

I for one refuse to buy me mate his beer as he drinks lager tops

I accept I might get some shite for this but hey ho ( me bird also immacs/veets me back every few months-daren't get waxed )"





He`s even deleted his post so that confirms it 100% but he cant delete this copy see above ,Puffta!
 
#14
So you've got a bird but you think you might be gay. That makes you, at best, bi-.

To confirm what you are one way or the other, get the bird to ram a cucumber up your hoop. If you like it a lot, ditch the bird and shack up with a gibson called Erol, because you are gay.

Oh, and post some photos of your bird ramming the cucumber up your hoop as well.
 
T

trowel

Guest
#15
So you've got a bird but you think you might be gay. That makes you, at best, bi-.

To confirm what you are one way or the other, get the bird to ram a cucumber up your hoop. If you like it a lot, ditch the bird and shack up with a gibson called Erol, because you are gay.

Oh, and post some photos of your bird ramming the cucumber up your hoop as well.
The problem there,CS, is that there is no such thing as a gay Gibson. This must be true, because a mini cab driving Nigerian told me so.
 
#16
That wouldn't be the Nigerian mini cab driver who is a former finance minister would it? I think I know him. Small world or wot?
 
T

trowel

Guest
#17
That wouldn't be the Nigerian mini cab driver who is a former finance minister would it? I think I know him. Small world or wot?
No, this one was some sort of trainee vicar. I showed him a Jamaican tranny who minced about nearby selling his scrawny black arse whilst dressed in mini skirt and high heels. The Nigerian still wouldn`t believe me. He was certain that the black tranny was a "fallen woman".
 
#18
As a qualified Coroner I can safely state that Mr Moggly died of ARRSEicide, a very painful and drawn out method of self inflicted demise, on or about the 14/7/12.
God rest his soul, the big flouncy gayer.
 
#19
Oh Mog. Why have you edited your opening thread post? Stick by your pink guns, brother.


Sent from my iPhone using ARRSE app with my weiner fingers.
 
#20
Now I class meself as a real bloke - ride a 1600cc motorbike, do shedloads of x/c mountain biking, at 49 years young I am still moshing and slamming me head into huge speakers at my local rock/bikers pub as the live bands play very, VERY loud Sabbath/Maiden/Dio/Motorhead/AC/DC etc, done a few tours, drink beer not lager, wear proper Wrangler straight leg jeans with piss/beer stained trainers and black T-shirts. ( never in a million years would I wear fcuking shoes with jeans ), hate tucking in C95/wearing of belts over smocks, do not say partner or say other leftie phrases blah blah

However, every now and again I like to scrub me feet with one of those ped egg things-a small gauge cheesgrater ( you'd be surprised at how much dead skin comes off ) and then put some of me birds body butter on them-it makes me want to prance around the lounge on me tippytoes waving my arms about in a Peter out of Family Guy type way.



Anyone else have similar things we shouldn't really share.

I for one refuse to buy me mate his beer as he drinks lager tops

I accept I might get some shite for this but hey ho ( me bird also immacs/veets me back every few months-daren't get waxed )
Why did you think this was a good idea with that line?
 
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