Hes a better man than me luv.

Discussion in 'Blue Jokes' started by oldpara, Jul 3, 2013.

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  1. Took the wife out to a dinner dance the other night. I'd been catching up with some mates from my local alcoholics anonymous, at the bar. when I got back to my table the wife says "while you were at the bar,that bloke over there asked me for a dance - while we dancing he said to me - I'd like to turn you upside down,hold you by the ankles,fill your vagina full of Guiness then slurp it all down in one gulp !! Are you going to have a word with him ?" Am I fuck I said, any man who can drink 5 pints of Guiness in one gulp is a better man than me !!
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  2. Answered a knock at the door last night. Two cops were standing there. One of them was holding up a picture of my wife. Is this your wife Sir, he said. Yeah I said, what of it ? Looks like she's been in a car crash, he said ? Well I fuckin know that, I said. But she's got a nice personality and she's a damn good cook !!
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  3. My wife always keeps her eyes shut while we are having sex ? You know why ? Cos she fuckin hates to see me enjoying myself.
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  4. I think my wifes ill. Sex is the same, but the washing is building up.!
  5. The Lord be praised!!

    Les Dawson is alive after all
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  6. Tell OP Yewtree then that death ISN'T the end.
  7. LOL