Hemel Hempstead conspiracy theories

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by cpunk, Dec 11, 2005.

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  1. cpunk

    cpunk LE Moderator

    OK, I reckon that Al Qa'eda have crashed the missing airliner from 9/11 - you know, the one that didn't hit the Pentagon - into the oil refinery to push up the price of oil and thus benefit the Bush family and their friends like Dick Cheney.

    Any advance on that?
  2. Were Lord Lucan and Elvis piloting it?
  3. cpunk

    cpunk LE Moderator

    Nope, Knights Templars.
  4. Are you sure it wasn't the captain of the Exxon Valdez?
  5. So no one else saw the fast moving silver disc that caused a pile up on the M1 then? They've closed the motorway due to "thick black smoke" Yeah , the smoke pots that THEY lit to cover the landing they mean . If news came out that the Greys had initated contact, it would send a shockwave round the world, not just 5 square miles of Hemel Hempstead.

    Watch the skies and deny everything.
  6. Ruth Kelly hasn't made a statement, so Opus Dei must be involved.
  7. cpunk

    cpunk LE Moderator

    I'll see your space aliens and raise you ancient inter-dimensional gods led by Cthulhu.
  8. We are prepared on my commune.


    Are you?
  9. She’s finally arrived, its was Amelia Earhart & Fred Noonan. His navigation has had them lost for a while. But like a homing pigeon she finally made it, although the landing was a bit rough.

    Either that or local nurses banned from smoking in thier NHS trust have found a new smoking area.
  10. Sounds more like a "Nyarlathotep" job to me
  11. omg, i'v misplaced mi tin foil hat.
  12. No conspiracy unfortunately, it would seem the explosion was the result of boredom in the early hours amongst the workers who took to having a fart lighting contest to pass the time until they clocked off. This was confirmed by a nurse at the local hospital who noticed several charred rectums amongst the survivors and the imprint of a BIC lighter on one workers arrse cheek :lol:
  13. Nah, all bollocks. It's obviously Xenu who has returned with L. Ron Hubbard's reincarnated self!
  14. It was two-jags Prescotts doing so he can raise fuel taxation in March.

    A mate's brothers uncles grandfather saw him somewhere near the scene trying to light a dodgy zippo.....
  15. The Freemasons are covering up the fact that the explosion was caused by a top secret American satellite death-ray weapon launched from space. It missed it's intended target, Paris, because of a data inputting error by a USAF Master Sgt. who also happens to be the Grand Master Elk With Golden Horns of No. 5604 (NSA) Lodge. A quick phone call to the Rotarians (oh yes, butter would melt in their mouths, it really would) of Hertfordshire led to a crack Masonic "Incident Denial" team swinging into action. They concocted this farcical story that this act of super-weapon folly was in fact a simple industrial accident. That the UK Media so slavishly tow the line on this one is a savage indictment of the fact that the BBC is led by morphing, mind-controlling psionic octopii who are also Masons.

    Does anyone also notice the so-called coincidence that this facility sits on a ley-line? The ancient sunken Roman temple of the demonic deity Xarg lies nearby, not far from Hemel Hempstead (a name which, if you run it through my special "conspiracy theory tracking software" actually means "Ancient and Evil Temple Devoted To Masonry"). Could it be that the "USAF Masonic Error" theory is in fact a cloak for a Black Op by the CIA (and the Masons) to bring back Xarg, using Dick Cheney as a willing avatar for this vile demonic entity to once again stride the earth?

    The complex web of lies that surrounds the tissue of deceit wrapped by a big golden bow of shiny misinformation surrounding this event is remarkable. The entire area needs covering in tin foil VERY URGENTLY. I am starting a website to alert others of the risk.

    This service is entirely free, gratis and for nothing.

    I remain your intrepid investigator into these fell conspiracies.