Help wanted!

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Tubbyboy, Mar 5, 2006.

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  1. I have a problem that I need help with and I don't know where else to turn.

    I recently got a puppy who is, on the whole, a pretty good dog. However, in the last couple of days he has started to show a very unhealthy interest in my leg. He doesn't go anywhere near Mrs Tubby's legs and he only plays with the more colourful and flamboyant toys.

    Does this mean I have a gay dog? Am I going to come home and find him listening to Barbra Streisand and wearing a bandana?

    Are there any suggestions on how I can "turn" him so that he might show an interest in the bitches again?

    Cheers for any comments,

  2. tubbs,
    first of all you need to know, your not alone, i to had a bufty for a dog, i know the fear of coming home and seeing mans "best friend" shaving his legs and dancing to the music off Ghost, on his own. A Dog who "quite likes cats" is a shame to his owner, try dressing in womans cloths to see if you can help him associate female and fcuk!
    if that fails, your going to have to do the right thing a stand by him!
    as the vet issues the fatal injection.
  3. Stop using Oil of In Season on your legs perhaps? :p
  4. To make things worse, he is French and ginger! If he hadn't cost so much money I'd do the decent thing and sell him to the nearest kebeb house or chinky restaurant.
  5. nope he is just pleasing his "daddy" it is well known that puppies can spot "the gay" so he knows you are one, even if you don't :wink:
  6. Are you saying that its wrong to smear peanut butter on my genitals? :wink:
  7. you bought a french dog and cant figure out why its bent???

    its cos its french matey.

    shoot it!
  8. I have posted on this subject before


    use marmite it sticks like a good un!
  9. 8O Bloody Hell, Tubby! I consider you my mate and all, but you deserve everything you get!
  10. the other option is of course to have the dog's balls chopped off! A couple of bricks should do the job nicely!
  11. I don't want to do that as he has a brilliant pedigree and I may want to breed from him, unfortunately, if he carries on the way he's going now, that may be a moot point. I might have to smear male dogshit around the females bits so he thinks he is doing her up the wrongun!
  12. Episode II of the gay dog saga:

    Just been sitting on the sofa with him next to me and the little bastard tried to jump on my face and stick his cock in my mouth. I wouldn't have minded, but he didn't even buy me a drink first!

    Are there any medications I can buy to up his male hormones and put him straight again? Would dry bumming him teach him a lesson or would that make the problem worse?

    The little twat is also showing an unhealthy interest in his own waste, is he also going to get into golden showers?
  13. as i have said in other threads.

    dip your dick in vasaline and then into cat litter, give him a sound seing to, hey presto , dog scared sh*tless of willy.

    this should solve your problem. thank you im here all night
  14. When I saw your post i thought it was going to be help wanted for charity or someone seriously needing help. I am finding your post rather offensive. Dog rape is a serious crime. If you carry on you might find yourself in the same position as Mr Glitter. I think this thread should be removed I happen to like dogs. Dog is mans best friend and this post is offensive.
  15. Nothing a size 10 will not sort out, on the other hand you could lend him to a mong for a day or 2, if that does not straighten him out, then I am afraid you will never see your potential puppies :lol: