Help - skirt needed for monday

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by vvaannmmaann, Feb 3, 2013.

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  1. Without wanting to go into the details, I need to borrow an blue skirt of someone for monday. I've recently passed out after two lager shandies. I'm meant to be in the dole office on monday. Last night I was out drinking and I lent my skirt to a mate to walk home in. He's lost it.

    I've also lost my oyster card the other night on the lash.

    I don't know what to do. But I know I can't turn up in a hoody, cos I'm a right shit cunt.

    So if you are in the south, please can I borrow an skirt please. You'd need to drop it of as I don't drive.

    • Like Like x 6
  2. FrosteeMARIA

    FrosteeMARIA LE Gallery Guru

    PM me your address, I'll be right over.........what size are you love?
  3. Slack, dole bludging individual. Harrumph etc.
  4. Size eight of course!
    • Like Like x 1
  5. Wot a coincidence-i lent my only shreddies to a mate who'd had a slight accident in his after 15 pints of stellar last night-ive got to go to an important meeting on mondays as well-if anybody has a spare pair can you get them to me asap. i'll undrstand if there not too clean as it is short notice and by the way can someone lend me the fare as its two weeks to payday and ive lost my bus pass ! if you can deliver them at the same time as vaaanmans skirt this would be a stupendous result !problem is i live in the north so you might have to make a slight 400 mile detour but i would be ever so greatful !!
  6. Brotherton Lad

    Brotherton Lad LE Reviewer

    What a coincidence! I've been looking for a spare bit of skirt as well. I'm halfway up the A1, so anyone en route from Winchester could drop it off. Ta muchly.
    • Like Like x 1
  7. Porridge_gun

    Porridge_gun LE Good Egg (charities)

    Ask one of the AGC lads, they'll lend you thier tights too.
    • Like Like x 1
  8. BL- if your half way up the m1 turn round-pick up the skirt for vaaanman - deliver that then come north and lend me your shreddies and job jobbed-oh and me and vaanman would be so so greatful !! and could a mod then delete this thread as it makes us all seem like fkcwits
    • Like Like x 1
  9. I found some MTP on the street in Winchester this AM. Bit of puke on it, but should still fetch a few quid on eBay.
    Result a MOD90 in one of the pockets too. What a Mong looking cunt.
    Do I get a reward if I hand it in? I'd settle for a letter of thanks and a PAYD voucher.
    • Like Like x 3
  10. FrosteeMARIA

    FrosteeMARIA LE Gallery Guru

    Only Eight? That's way too've got to be at least a ten.......
  11. EMERGENCY OVER-ive found my mates shreddies stuffed behind a radiator- once ive spooned the dried out shit off them and given them a good shake they will be right as rain !! so BL just turn around again and continue on your journey- forget vvannman's skirt as i think he was only winding you up and as such should be treated with the contempt he deserves !! oh and dont forget mods to delete this thread as i dont want to be regarded as some sort of retarded fuckwit tank driver like in another thread !!
    • Like Like x 1
  12. I've got one you can borrow - It belongs to an old RM mate of mine who lent to me to try to pull a bird - Anyhoo I'll be down the Carlisle tonight so pop in with 'all bikers are poofs' written across your forehead - also you can borrow my pinkie too.

  13. You've got to love a variation on a theme. :)
    • Like Like x 1
  14. Rather embarrassingly, I have lost my medals on a night out and need them for parade* on Monday.

    (*showing off down Yates's Wine Lodge).

    If someone can lend me theirs, I will even let you bring them to me (I can drive, but can't be f*cked).

    I've lost: QGJM, VRSM but I need to borrow: MBE, MC, NI GSM, Nato Kos, Nato FY, Iraq and Afghan as well. I can't tell you why - Data Protection Act, Human Rights and all that. But trust me, I'll bring them back.

    If one of you could also lend me a uniform to put them on, that would be smashing. Don't mind what reg/corp as long as it's RSM or Brigadier (again, DPA prevents me explaining that one).

    • Like Like x 1
  15. I hope nobody who knows someone who works at the dole office doesn't read this and grass you up.

    Size 8 you say?