Help Required for revenge

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by thebluemanc, Oct 14, 2010.

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  1. Last year on tour I received a parcel from a supposed friend, this contained things that were totally useless to me, IE Italian 6ft extension, 1 sock, some cat food etc, now the roles are reversed and I need some good idea of things to send him. The rules are simple nothing illegal or over 2 KGs, fire away lads.
  2. Bouillabaisse

    Bouillabaisse LE Book Reviewer

    The best revenge is send him something useful. He'll feel really shitty for doing you over last year
  3. Good parcels will also be sent, it will be like russian roulete with parcels, most bad but every now and again a good one :)
  4. a 32oz porterhouse steak, and a box of cornettos
  5. Ravers

    Ravers LE Reviewer Book Reviewer

    Send him an airmail bluey full of pube trimmings.
  6. What was bad about the cat food?
  7. Send him a sock full of stale spunk.

    I may add that I've never done this and any similarity to any other spunk type prank is purely coincidental.
  8. my pube trimmings :)

    I always found that the parcels I received with absolutely nothing of any use in, to be the best ones. Great for morale.

    I once got sent a flashing bow-tie, not to disimilar to thsi was excellent:

  9. maninblack

    maninblack LE Book Reviewer

    A picture frame from your local pound shop, a spark plug spanner and an ornament for an aquarium.
  10. Sympathetic_Reaction

    Sympathetic_Reaction LE Book Reviewer

    send him all the junkmail that arrives at your house addressed to "the occupier"
  11. Dead battery, panty liner (with wings if you're feeling adventurous) and an empty biro. Why not chuck in a Tour Guide to an odd country as well

    Not sure why those just popped into my head!
  12. Empty tictac box, last years diary, collection of navel lint, some dead AAA batteries, dried Prittstick.
  13. Sympathetic_Reaction

    Sympathetic_Reaction LE Book Reviewer

    encrypted USB stick without the password (as given to me last birthday by a mate)
    used stables.
    toilet roll inner
    the bits of paper from the centre of hole punches
    Used Train ticket
    Last weeks losing Lottery ticket
    Losing Lottery scratch card already scratched out

    Your mind goes down some very wierd directions with this doesn't it.
  14. Coupons for Morrisons

    Dried out lumo pens

    Your shopping receipt showing the purchase of:

    some hi tech gadget
  15. You sir, are legendary if you managed to send one those through in a bluey.
    Cap duly doffed.